


Come Morning Light

by Lexilindale35



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Kings & Queens, Royalty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-21
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-05 09:09:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 56,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4174212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexilindale35/pseuds/Lexilindale35
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every dawn brings horror to a different family in a land ruled by a killer. Bellamy, the seventeen-year-old king of Arcadia, takes a new bride each night only to have her executed at sunrise. So it is a suspicious surprise when seventeen-year-old Clarke Griffin volunteers to marry Bellamy. </p><p>But she does so with a clever plan to stay alive and exact revenge on the king for the murder of her best friend and countless other girls. Clarke’s wit and will, indeed, get her through to the dawn that no others have seen, but with a catch. . . she’s falling in love with the very boy who killed her dearest friend.</p><p>She discovers that the murderous boy-king is not all that he seems and neither are the deaths of so many girls. Clarke is determined to uncover the reason for the murders and to break the cycle once and for all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm in love with this story. I recently finished The Wrath and the Dawn and it's an amazing book. So I took the basic story for that and threw in my favorite couple. 
> 
> I changed a few things, took a few liberties with the story but the things I changed work better. Can't wait to post an update and move the story along!
> 
> I hope you guys like it, because it's been a blast to write =)
> 
> As always comments are appreciated.

Harper was dead. My best friend, my cousin, gone. We all knew this would happened, the moment the king summoned her to become his bride she started to count down the days. I just didn't realize how quickly it would happen. I didn't realize how hard it would be to breathe when the word finally reached us. She was gone, she would never come home. I would never hear her laughter or see her smile at my stupid jokes.

The one person who had always been there for me was gone. My uncle would never get to walk his daughter down the aisle and watch her become a wife. He would never have grandchildren, my children will never have cousins. All because this monster had decided she was his next victim. There was no pattern to his madness, he chose each girl without warning or reason. He just needed a wife, there were plenty of young girls to choose from down here.

I knew what I had to do. I stepped up and volunteered to become his next wife. Harper wouldn't die for no reason. I would find out his secrets, I could kill the son of a bitch for taking away my family. I would ensure that my little sister would never have to fear the reaper that was our king.

The maids dressed me in their finest silk gown. It was white, but not ceremonial white. It was a creamy color, that made my bright blue eyes pop out. They were the only colored accessory I had one. The dress clinched at the waist, tied together with a cold chain. The gown reached my feet, they were bare. Apparently the king hated shoes, my feet would be bare for the ceremony. My stomach was in knots as I watched the brown haired girl do my hair. She pulled it up into a bun, her eyes avoiding mine in the mirror.

I guess they knew they couldn't get close. I wasn't supposed to live past dawn. 

I bit my lip, pushing away the tears. I wouldn't cry, I had made this choice. I would make the king pay for Harper and all the other innocent lives he took. No one understood why he killed his wives, but I would find out. I would find a way to make his monster stop.

Even if I did it with my last breath.

"Clarke," my dad’s voice shook me as I heard the door open. I fought off even more tears,  when I saw him enter the room. I wanted to do this alone, I hadn't wanted anyone to follow me. I shouldn’t have been surprised he didn’t listen. I got my hard headiness from him, "what are you doing?”

My hair was finished and I turned around to face him, "dad I told you not to follow me.”

The maid walked away from my chair as my dad came to hug me. I stood up, feeling the lump in my throat as his strong arms pulled me close. My dad was always there, he had chased away every single monster. He was the one person who always promised me things would be okay. He couldn’t chase away this monster, it had gotten too powerful.

There were tears in my eyes, sparkling as I tried to speak to him in an even tone, "I have to do this. I have to make things right, Harper—”

My voice broke as he nodded. Harper was his niece, he knew how broken his brother was losing his only daughter. Now he was facing the same fate. He didn’t realize I had a plan, "I know sweetheart. She didn't deserve to meet her end that way. But neither do you. You don't deserve to die at the hands of a monster. Please reconsider this Clarke.”

I shook my head, "I won't let Octavia grow up fearing him. I won't let her wonder if she's his next bride, his next victim. This has to stop.”

My dad put his hand against my cheek, his eyes soft as he sighed, "you're so much like your mother sometimes it kills me. You've got her fight, her spirit. She would be so proud of you.”

I smiled for a brief moment, hoping he was right, “dad.”

I didn’t know what else to say. There was so much we were leaving unsaid, so many things we were supposed to have done together. He was my dad, he held me when I was born. He wasn’t supposed to see me die, I wasn’t supposed to be buried before he was. I closed my eyes as he pressed his lips against my forehead.

He knew exactly what I was thinking, “I can't lose you too, Clarke.”

I was doing this for my mom, for the fight that had taken her away from us. She was so strong, so beautiful even in her last few hours. I missed her, I knew she would understand why I had to do this. She always understood me.

A tear slipped down his cheek as I hugged him tightly, "you won't lose me. I promise. I will survive him," I pressed my lips against his cheek and pulled away, "just keep Octavia safe. Wells will take you out of the city.”

He nodded as a knock sounded, the maid who had done my hair cleared her throat, "it is time my lady.”

I nodded, "I love you," I whispered letting his hand go before he pulled me out of the room with him.

"May we meet again," he whispered, his hand over his lips as they opened the door and I made my way towards my king. My heart was pounding, my feet barely made a sound against the floor as I walked. I thought about running, not that I would get far. I’m sure there were guards station all around this place. They would all laugh at me, why would I run when I was the one who asked for this? I volunteered, of course I knew the price of becoming his bride.

I let out a slow breath, feeling the butterflies in my stomach as I got ready to give myself away. I was about to become a wife, the man who I married was a stranger. Worse he was a monster.

I couldn't lose my nerve. I took in a deep breath as we stood there for another second. Then the maid put a veil over my face, and then two large doors opened.

He stood at the end of the aisle, there was an audience already gathered. His guards, family, I'm sure. Of course my family wasn't invited. A part of me was glad that my family wasn’t here to see me walk towards my death. The other part was sad, because they would never get to see me walk down the aisle towards the man I would marry. Maybe it was for the best, maybe they didn’t need to see this moment.

They should remember me for the girl I was, the girl who kept them laughing and always thought on her feet. I wanted them to remember my laughter, my drive. The same way we remembered my mother.

I swallowed the lump as I held onto the flowers, my hands shaking. I started to walk slowly, his back was towards me. I kept my eyes on him, wondering if he was numb to this experience now. He had to have been through so many ceremonies it wasn’t like this was the most important day of his life. Not like it was supposed to be, not like it was for me. This was the biggest thing I had ever done.

Even if the man at the end of the aisle was a stranger.

He didn't turn around, his shaggy hair the only feature I could make out. He was wearing black pants and a jacket, his sword hanging low on his belt. He was tall, taller than I expected. The muscles pulled against his jacket, if this had been another time another place, I would’ve found him attractive. I had never seen our king in person. I only heard rumors. He was young, handsome, but a monster hid behind his guise. 

He was soulless, he proved that every dawn.

I stopped at the alter as the minister held his hand up. I was still behind him, his shoulders broad, his stance stiff. He stood so still, he didn't even try to turn and look at me. Of course he was used to this by now. He had been to more than fifty weddings at this point. He was only seventeen, the same age as me. He had more partners than someone my father’s age. It would’ve been comical if it wasn’t sad.

After a moment the music stopped and he turned to face me. I gasped, his big brown eyes were hard, but they were beautiful. His hair hung just above his eyes. There were more than a dozen freckles lining his handsome face. His jaw was clenched, his eyes searching mine for the answer to the question every single person in this room was asking.

_Why did she volunteer? Surely she knows her fate._

He offered me his hand, the maid slipping in to take the flowers from me. I took his hand, surprised at the warmth it offered me. His big fingers curled around mine, his body turning back towards the minister. His features never faltered, no expression filled his eyes. He cleared his throat as I stepped forward and took my place beside him. 

A place Harper had once stood, knowing exactly how she would end up. My hate for him was fueled by the grief I still held for my cousin, my best friend. 

I looked over at him out of the corner of my eyes. His hand still held mine, his eyes were staring straight forward. His lip twitched, like he felt me watching him as the minister starting talking. I didn't listen, this was my last day on earth. I didn't know how I wanted to spend it, but I knew it wasn't with this swine.

Finally we bowed our heads in prayer. After he blessed us and our marriage, we said the vows every marriage ceremony ends with. The king faced me, his expression just as hard as it had been when he saw me that first day when I volunteered. I took in a deep breath, repeating after the minister slowly. His brown eyes held secrets he wasn't willing to share.

I knew a way to keep those secrets from getting me killed. 

We didn't kiss. We did however drink from the same wine glass. Then we were ushered out of the church, the sun setting behind the big window of the castle. My new husband let go of my hand, my maids showing me to my room. 

It was huge, glamorous and more than I could've ever dreamed to have. Except it didn't matter, because come morning this wouldn't belong to me anymore. I pulled off my veil, remembering back to when I was a child. I used to think my wedding night would be amazing, it would be as exciting as my wedding. Now here I was, in a castle far away from my friends and family, standing all alone in my wedding dress.

I was staring down the grim reaper, I wasn't sure I was really ready for this.

I sat on the bed, waiting for him. Every guy wants to claim their prize right? Even if he never has to see me again, surely he would consummate our marriage. I had to find his weakness, I had to find a way to take down the beast who had killed so many girls who were just like me.

He didn't come for a long time. The maids came and went, bringing food and wine. I didn't eat, I just stared at the table like it would all disappear if I tried hard enough to will it away. I wasn't hungry, facing death made me lose all desire to eat. 

The moon was high in the sky, I looked at it through the doors that led to the balcony. I swallowed the pain, pushing away harpers memory. Maybe she sat here, wondering if she could make a run for it. Maybe she just accepted her fate and went to sleep. Either way it didn't matter, I would be his first bride to put up a fight. I wouldn't die easily.

My mom’s face entered my thoughts as I turned towards the door. It was strangely quiet in the castle, you would think a wedding called for a celebration. Of course this wedding would be followed by a funeral, no one wanted to celebrate those two things together. I closed my eyes, wondering what my mother would say if she could see me now.

Before the killings started my mom would bounce me on her knee and tell me someday I could marry the prince. Someday I would live in a castle and have lots of babies who would run around wearing their own little crowns. No one knew this monster would hide behind the walls. No one knew our friends, our daughters would start disappearing at the hands of the ruler we were supposed to follow.

"I'm sorry mama," I whispered to the empty hair, "I had no other choice.”

"You always have a choice my dear," her voice was soft in my ear, "you can take the easy way out or you can fight. You're my fighter, the spark within the flames.”

I wiped away a tear, scolding myself for crying. I couldn't show any weakness, not when I was so close to death. I took in a deep breath, praying that my family had made it out alive. I wanted Octavia to grow up with a chance at a life outside these walls. I wanted her and Lincoln to have babies with our blue eyes and his stubborn jaw. I wanted her to live, to become the woman I always knew she could be.

She was the reason I was doing this. She was the one thing that helped me through our mothers death, she held my hand and I made sure she had all the love our mother had given me growing up. She was my other best friend, the one I would never let him get his hands on.

I played with a thread from my dress, the minutes ticking by. The food had grown cold, the soft music stopped playing. Finally, when the clock struck half past midnight the knock came. I sat up straighter, my stomach filling with butterflies. This was it, my king had finally come.

The door opened and he stood there in all his glory. The same look on his face as he had during the wedding. He looked at me, his mouth forming a thin line. He closed the doors behind him, no one else followed him.  

I bowed my head, "my lord.”

He didn't answer, instead he stepped forward and put his hand against my cheek. His other came to rest on my hip. His eyes were bright, they were hiding all the answers I wanted to know. My heart stopped as we stood there staring at each other.

"You have no idea what you've done," his voice was deep, it was hard. I would've jumped away from him if he hadn't been holding me so tightly. 

I felt the air leave my lungs as he pushed me backwards, towards the bed. I was right, this was what he wanted after all. I swallowed my pride and my fear, his hands unzipping my dress. He didn't kiss me, for that I was glad. My hands were shaking as he laid me down on the mattress.

I closed my eyes, reminding myself again. I wouldn't suffer, I wouldn't die. I would see another sunset and another sunrise. This monster wouldn't be the death of me, neither would this dawn. I would beat him at his own game, no matter what it took.

This monster was done ruling our kingdom. He had no idea that he'd finally met his match. I might be little, but I was strong. I had been given everything I needed by the woman who raised me. I would prove them all wrong, I would see my family again. I would see them in this lifetime not the next.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night of their wedding should've been special. Instead Clarke's counting down the minutes until her execution.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh so this chapter really sets up the story. I hope you're confused (as was I went when I read this book) because it makes the ending SO MUCH BETTER! I'm so excited to post.

I pulled on the silk robe that was beside my bed once we were finished. He didn’t say anything, he pulled his pants on and walked towards the table filled with fruit. I felt the heat against my cheeks as I took in a deep breath, the moon still high in the sky. I had five hours until the sun broke the horizon. I have five hours left of life, five hours to find a way to make this monster pay.

I was nervous, he didn't seem like the type who wanted to have a conversation. That wouldn't stop me, I would die trying. I wouldn't be afraid of him or his kingdom. I was taught to be brave, I would die brave. I was doing this for something bigger than myself. I was going to bring justice to Harper’s death. I took in a breath and sat down across from him at the table. He watched me eat a grape, I smiled.

I leveled my gaze towards his, watching as he took a bite of the strawberry in front of him. He wasn’t what I thought he would be. He wasn’t dark and broody. He was quiet and mysterious. He was a monster disguised behind a mask that told me nothing useful. I had to find his weakness, I had to figure out why he killed his brides before they even had a chance.

"So my lord, come here often?" the words were out before I could really think through what I was saying. One of my many problems was that my tongue was faster than my brain.

He sighed, "don't call me that.”

I noticed him avoiding my question, "fine then what should I call you? My king? My husband? Or maybe the most fitting title, my executioner.”

His eyes got narrow, "you knew the consequences when you volunteered," his voice was clipped and I felt my cheeks blush at his anger, "no one asked you to be my wife.”

I shrugged, "well maybe I just saw all the girls doing it and I decided it looked like fun.”

I saw the corner of his mouth twitch, he was trying to hide a smile. He didn't do a very good job as he looked down at his hands. I took another grape, watching as he sat there stoically. He was barely a person, he couldn't have a soul. 

Or maybe the killings have made his this way.

No, I scolded myself. I will not feel something for this evil monster. He killed Harper, he was going to kill me. I wouldn't even think about giving him a chance.

"Aren't you scared?" he asked quietly, his hands playing with the corner of the table cloth. I swallowed the lump in my throat and studied him closely. How would I find a weakness when he didn't give me anything to go on?

I shook my head, "you said it yourself, my life was forfeit the moment I volunteered. Tell me, my king, should I be scared?”

He brought his eyes up to mine and held my gaze. I shivered, his brown eyes were hard and full of pain. He was a haunted man, I could see that even from a distance. Was he haunted by the wives he's killed? Did he fear the dawn like I was supposed to?

Or was he pretending? Was this all a show for me?

"Bellamy," he said quietly. I raised an eyebrow, realizing he was answering my earlier question, "call me Bellamy.”

I nodded my head slowly, "King Bellamy," I said with a steady voice, "so tell me how this works. Do I get to ask you questions? Will you answer them? Seeing as I'm a dead woman walking, you might as well give me peace of mind.”

The calm was gone, "I don't answer questions. We aren't even supposed to be here, together," he closed his eyes hard. He was fighting himself, there was a battle going on behind his eyes.

I nodded, "so then we just wait? If we can't talk do we just watch the sunrise?”

His eyes glossed over, "you do realize I'm the king. Has no one taught you how you speak to a king?”

I smiled, the smile Wells used to tell me brought all the boys to their knees, "oh of course my king, I know how to speak to you. But you are also my husband, I don't obey without reason.”

He nodded his head, running his hand through his curls. He drew in a breath, his jaw clenched, "you are not what I expected.”

"What did you expect? A scared little girl who didn't question you or your actions? A wife who would go silently to the gallows when the sun comes up?”

He shook his head, bringing his eyes to mine, "you aren't making this easier. I shouldn't have come, Finn was right. There's too much at risk.”

He didn't move, but he kept staring at me. It was like he was waiting for me to cower, waiting for me to beg for my life. I wouldn't beg, I would stay strong. Because I wouldn't let him take me down. 

I raised an eyebrow at him, "why does a powerful King such as yourself enjoy this game?”

He shook his head, "please don’t."

He looked hurt, like I had said the wrong thing. He started to stand up but I grabbed his hand before he could move, "please forgive me, Bellamy. I just, I'm nervous," I saw his eyes light up as I touched his hand, "please stay."

He stood there staring at me, his eyes lingering on our hands touching. I wondered if he felt the spark I had when I touched him. Of course I pushed the feeling down. I was doing this for one reason and one reason only.

Harper.

I let out a breath and watched his face go back to the stoic expression he always wore. He was thinking it through, he was deciding my fate as he stood there. I could tell, I could see it all playing behind his eyes.

"I actually have a story I wanted to share with you. Do you like stories?"

He sat back down slowly. I could see something in his eyes, he was remembering something. Did this creature have a childhood? I never realized that maybe he was surviving the only way he knew how.

No he killed Harper and he would kill me if I didn't bide my time right. Finally he nodded his head, his hand pulling away from mine, "proceed."

I smiled and then sat up straighter, folding my hands in front of me. My mom used to tell me stories, Octavia said I had her ability to weave tales easily. Hopefully that was true. I needed the king to be interested. I needed him to want to hear the end so badly, he would wait until the sunset tomorrow.

Bellamy pulled his hand away from mine, the warmth leaving my skin. I felt my heart sink as he readjusted his position. I shook my head, I wouldn't feel anything for this monster. I had a duty, a plan I had to carry out. This wasn't going to be easy, not if I let him get to me.

"I've been told I'm a pretty good storyteller my king," I took a sip of wine, "the children in my village loved when I gathered them around the fire.”

He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, "do you want children?”

His question took me by surprise, "it really doesn't matter now does it? I mean after all come morning I wouldn't really have the chance for children.”

He looked hurt, "I suppose that's true."

"Now can I share my story with you?" He nodded, pretending to zip his lips closed and leaned back into his chair, "my mother used to tell me the story when I was a child. It's always been my favorite.”

He nodded his head, telling me to go ahead with the story.

"The earth couldn't hold human life anymore, so the surviving people created a space craft. They formed a race within themselves and lived on the vessel, hoping to come back down one day. This vessel was huge, they called it the ark. Thousands of people lived within the ark, many generations passed through the halls. They all had one dream; to be the generation to set foot back on the ground.”

I swallowed, pausing for measure as I took a grape. My eyes went towards the blinds. I couldn't help but wonder how much time I had left. It's true what they say, if you know you're about to die, every single second counts.

I leaned back in my chair, well aware of his eyes on me, "so close to one hundred years pass and the ark is stable, the people are healthy and alive. They're thriving, even if they are only allowed one child. They created an order, they've got a chancellor and a counsel. They have structure and even their own form of judicial system. If you commit a crime under the age of 18 you are locked in a cell until your case is reviewed when you're an adult.”

"Very generous," he says raising his eyebrows, "all crimes? Even murder?”

I nodded, "yes. Most crimes are punished by death, but only if you're over 18. The children should get a chance to survive the ark. They believe in second chances.”

Bellamy was quiet, clearly thinking about my story. He sighed, “interesting."

"It gets better. After years of orbiting the earth, one of the engineers finds a flaw in their precious ark. They have only a few months of oxygen left before the system fails. They are on a sinking ship, if you will. Everyone will die, if they don't make a decision. They have two choices. Collect over two hundred and fifty people, innocent people, to die without reason," I raised an eyebrow as he fidgeted in his seat, "or find a way to the ground.”

He was staring at me, the light catching my eye under the blind. I had made it, the dawn had arrived. I smiled, my story still unfinished, "so what did they do?”

My eyes sparkled as he waited, the sun rising, the light shining through my window. The light told me I had a glimmer of hope left, "they're on the titanic and there aren't enough lifeboats to save them all.”

"So they killed innocent people for more oxygen?”

I shook my head, "there's more," there was a knock on the door, it was time, "but I'm afraid it is my time.”

He shook his head, "no you have to finish the story.”

"Give me one more night," I looked at him, I looked right into his eyes. I wouldn't beg him for my life, but I wouldn't go quietly either, "one more dawn and I will finish the story.”

Bellamy's jaw was stiff, his eyes hard. He knew what I was doing. He clasped his hands into fists as he stood up, his chair scraping loudly against the marble floors. His shirt was unbuttoned, his pants hung low on his hips. Again if this was another time, another place I might find the monster handsome.

But most venomous creatures were.

"Bellamy," I said his name as he stood there, the knock getting louder. 

His nostrils flared out as he nodded. He turned away from me, walking towards the door. His eyes were hard as he looked back at me, "fine. Just one.”

He threw open the door and just like that he was gone. I had survived the wrath of our king, for one more dawn.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke is granted one more day. Can she find a way to see yet another one?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS! Your comments are making me smile and these updates are so fast because I can't stop obsessing with this story. Like I said it's based off the wrath and the dawn, which is based off of one thousand and one nights. The stories of Aladdin and such can be found in this awesome tale.
> 
> As you can see I changed a few things in my story. I loved the idea of making the 100 the story Clarke tells. So hopefully this update will help you all. the chapter got really long so I had to split it up. Just means more updates for you beautiful readers =)

I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew the sun was high in the sky. I was exhausted, my eyes swollen from crying. I didn’t normally let myself cry, but this morning had been emotional. I had survived, Bellamy called off the execution. It was a little easier to breathe knowing I had twenty four hours left on this earth. Somehow that granted me access to my tears and they wouldn’t stop once they started. I pulled the covers closer, a countdown already starting in my head.

I had been granted one day, twenty four hours. I had to use them wisely. I had to find a way to take down the monster before he executed me. He had been entranced in my story, but that wouldn’t hold him for long. I ignored the image of him and his tired eyes, the soft light they held as he watched my mouth form words. I wouldn’t feel soft for him, he was a monster. A monster who must be stopped.

I opened my eyes slowly, a brown haired girl staring back at me. She had huge brown eyes, her hair falling down her shoulders. She was smiling, watching me as I took in her presence. There were secrets hidden behind her eyes, those secrets made her strong. She held herself upright, her gown a hand me down I'm sure. Still she was a survivor, I could see that in one glance. Something about her reminded me of Octavia, a pain hitting my heart. I missed my sister, I wondered if she would ever forgive me for leaving the way I did.

“Hi,” her voice was cheerful given the circumstances we were meeting, “I’m Raven. Bellamy asked me to be your handmaid.”

She was tidying up my room, my cheeks flushing as I realized she saw Bellamy’s belt on the floor. He must have forgotten it last night. I cleared my throat, about to tell her my name, but she kept talking, “I have to say I was excited that he chose me to meet you. It’s not every day that the queen survives the night. When we heard the news, that you were still here sleeping, we all wanted to meet the amazing woman who survived the king’s wrath.”

My blush got darker as I sat there staring at her. I pushed my hair out of my face, her hands busying grabbing one thing or another, “I’m Clarke,” I finally said as she set a dress down on the end of the bed. I assumed it was for me, “where is my husband?”

The word felt weird on my tongue, like a spicy food my mouth was rejecting. My heart picked up speed though, something I took note of. I wouldn’t let him get under my skin, I wouldn’t care about anything other than taking him down. Someone had to answer for the deaths of his former brides. Harper deserved justice, even if I had to die giving it to her.

She smiled again, coming to stand beside the bed, “he has business to attend to.”

“Right,” I nodded feeling stupid for asking the question. He had left this morning, I shouldn’t have expected him to be here when I woke up. He probably didn’t expect me to be here either, “I’m sure there’s a lot of business to go through since his guards didn’t get to strangle me this morning.”

Raven’s face paled as she took in a breath, “like I said the castle has been buzzing with the news of you since Bellamy charged down the steps with Finn on his heels telling him this was a bad idea. We haven’t had a real queen in a very long time.”

I groaned, standing up so she could make the bed. I knew that’s what she was waiting to do. I rubbed my eyes, grabbing the dress and heading for the changing curtain. I took in a deep breath, trying to form a plan in my head as to how I would find a weakness when my husband wasn’t around to watch. I pulled the dress on, leaving my robe on the floor.

Raven was finished making the bed, she followed me to the vanity. I sat down in front of the mirror and her eyes met mine, “you know he’s never actually spent a night with any of his brides,” she weaved her fingers through my blonde hair, “he’s never touched them, never cared enough to get to know them. That’s what made this all so easy.”

I raised an eyebrow as she looked away, her voice was soft, “is that so? Well maybe he wanted to know why I volunteered. I mean, no one has done that either. Not when they know becoming Bellamy’s wife means certain death.”

She nodded, “this is true. Still, he’s never looked twice at the brides, it’s like he’s trying to forget it happens after the wedding,” she shook her head, “I’ve known the king for a long time now, I’ve never seen him ask the guards to leave him alone in the room of a stranger.”

“Really?” that was interesting. The guards would’ve been in our room last night had Bellamy not told them to stay put, “so do you know why he kills his brides?”

She shook her head again, "I said I’ve known Bellamy a long time, that doesn't mean I understand him. I just know that whatever his reason is, it's not what you think it to be. He has been through a lot, but that doesn’t mean he’s lost his soul."

I had to hold back my snide comment. Bellamy couldn’t have a soul, because a person with a soul couldn’t watch his brides die every single morning without caring that their families would mourn long after they were gone. I bit my lips, realizing I needed to use my extra time to study my husband. Maybe he wasn't the monster I thought he was. Then again most of them were good at camouflaging or blending into their surroundings.

Raven was watching me process what she said. I thought about to this morning, he hesitated when the guards knocked. Even before I asked him for another day, he didn't want to let them inside. My heart sank, my brain pushing out the logical reasons. He didn't hesitate for me, he hesitated because he knew what was to come. He knew he would have to do this all over again. I wondered how many times it would take until he would finally be satisfied enough to stop. 

"You said he doesn't usually come to his brides," she stopped short of the vanity and turned back to open the blinds, letting the warm sunlight into the room, “why?"

She sighed, "he hates what happens," her voice was hard, "I know you think that he's this king locked away behind the castle doors murdering innocent young woman for fun. But that's not true, it's taken a lot out of him. He shuts himself behind these doors because he can barely stand to look at his reflection.”

I nodded slowly, "he seemed pretty okay with himself last night.”

Her eyes were narrow, "he likes honesty, he always has. You're the most honest, quick tongued person here. I can see why he broke the rules for you.”

“He broke the rules for me?" The question came out slow, I raised an eyebrow at her. 

She shook her head, putting her hands in the air, "I don't know anything. All I know is that I'm usually not cleaning the queen’s room while having a conversation with her. Usually I'm getting it ready for the next girl.”

I turned to face the mirror. Raven clearly knew more than she was letting on. Or else she knew the right things to say to make it seem that way. Whatever the reason, I wasn’t going to get the answers I wanted and so desperately needed from her.

I let out a slow breath. I took a different approach, "how many wives has he had?”

She clicked her tongue hard, "I haven't been keeping track. Around sixty or so.”

I nodded, "right. Okay. So the rules state he must kill each one.”

"There are no rules!" She raised her voice pulling the brush out of my hands, "Clarke Griffin you are going to get yourself tortured before they finally string you up if you keep up this questioning. I thought this would be easy.”

“Nothing worth having comes easy my dear,” her eyes lined up with mine in the mirror. She shook her head, trying her hardest not to smile as she sighed loudly. She was trying to look angry, but it wasn’t working.

I laughed, her anger subsiding, "I understand now, after this conversation, why the king likes you. Obviously he's found a match in someone as frustrating and stubborn as you.”

I wondered if she was right, maybe the monster had finally met his match with me. I liked to think that was the case. I was still making up the plan as I went, but I knew that when the time came I would take him out. I would make him pay for all the girls, even the faceless nameless ones he had long forgotten by now, got their justice.

Raven was brushing my hair slowly now, all the anger and tension gone from both of us. I had no reason to be angry with her, but I could tell she was afraid. I knew she would face punishment of some sort if she gave me the answers I wanted. That’s why I couldn’t just ask Bellamy himself. Although I knew if I did ask him he wouldn’t answer me anyways. Just like I wouldn’t answer him as to why I volunteered.

“How did you do it? How did you get him to agree to another day?”

I looked at this girl who had been suddenly thrusted into my life, my heart racing. This could be a trick, Raven could’ve been chosen for a reason. He might have done his research and found out about Octavia, whom I sent far away. She was with Wells, she was safe with him and my father outside of the kingdom. 

Still, no matter what she says, she might be a spy looking for my weaknesses to report back to the king. He might have a plan just like I did. I wanted to trust her, but there were so many reasons I couldn’t. I was in his house, the house of the monster. 

He took away my cousin, I couldn’t trust anyone here.

“A lady is allowed to have secrets too,” I smiled, watching as she started to braid the front of my hair. I saw her give me a smirk, her eyes telling me she understood my hesitation, “so what do you suggest we do on my very last day?”

Raven bit her lip as she worked on my hair, “let me show you around the castle. Maybe we’ll run into your husband and I can see how adorable you two are together,” she smiled brightly as she tugged a band into the end of the tiny braided headband, “I think he’s already pretty taken by you.”

I rolled my eyes. Raven was clearly a romantic at heart, “I doubt he is capable of any form of love. He’s a monster.”

She looked at me surprised, her hands running down the rest of my hair, brushing it off my shoulders. The dress I was wearing was a light blue, it brought out the color of my eyes. Even without makeup I didn’t look half bad, I wondered what Bellamy would think. I pushed that crazy notion out of my head before I thought about it too hard. He didn’t care about me, there was no way he cared about anyone but himself.

What kind of man killed innocent children? The children who were supposed to population his kingdom. He was supposed to care about his people, not slaughter their daughters before their very eyes.

“If you think the king is such a monster, then why did you volunteer to marry him?”

I turned around in the chair and looked at her, my silence stretching for a moment too long. She had finished my hair, her brown eyes searching mine for her answer. It was the same question Bellamy had asked me time and time again last night. I refused to answer him, because my reason wasn’t one he wanted to hear. But I wanted to believe I could be honest with Raven. I was desperately clinging to the idea of us becoming friends.

Maybe I couldn’t trust her, maybe I could. I would have to learn today. Still I took in a deep breath, a smile forming at the corner of my mouth, “someone has to slay the dragon.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter we met Raven. Now we meet Finn.
> 
> Clarke has 24 hours to find a way to take down her husband.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so here's the deal. I have a few chapters completely written. I will be away from Thursday to Sunday. With that said there will be a short hiatus between posting. I plan on leaving you all with a chapter before I go (to hold you over). I hope that's okay, although I promise you won't be disappointed by the chapter that's posted next.
> 
> Thanks for the comments and kudos. I LOVE THIS STORY as much as you all do =)

The castle was huge, if Raven hadn’t been with me I would’ve gotten lost a few times. There were so many turns, so many hallways that looked the same. It was a maze within a maze and I had no idea how she got around without a map. Still it was nice to have her company, to hear her tell me stories about the people within these walls, the ones who worked for the king and now myself. I didn’t consider myself the queen, because I would only hold that title for a few more hours.

Then there would be someone else to take my place. Another man’s daughter would sleep in my bed, then wake up to face the rope tied around her neck.

“I’m not a spy,” Raven’s words surprised me. We had been walking in silence down the hallway that apparently lead to the gardens. She was pretty excited to take me out to see the beautiful flowers growing around the castle, “I won’t tell him anything you’ve told me. I promise. I want to be your friend, your handmaid, but I won’t abuse your trust.”

I smiled at her, taking her hand in mine and squeezing it gently, “my father always told me I had a good sense of judging people. When I woke up, I didn’t think you were one of the bad guys. In fact I honestly thought you were the first friendly face I’ve seen around here since I arrived. So thank you.”

She smiled, I hugged her from the side. We were almost to the end of the hallway when I heard the noises. There were people out there and we weren’t standing at the garden. It was a field where the guards were training. Raven put a hand out to stop me as I watched one of them lung towards the other, their swords were real. I gasped, the knife barely reaching his shirt before he pulled back.

“Dammit,” she whispered, “I took the wrong hallway again. This castle is too dark.”

I smiled, “it’s okay,” I said watching the men as they moved in sync with each other, “I actually like this better. Is the king out here too?”

She shrugged, “I’m not sure. But I do know he’s the best swordsman in the kingdom. He fought long and hard for that title too, had his cousin and uncle teach him day in and day out how to handle his weapon before he took the throne. He’s nothing if not stubborn and persistent.”

I looked at her surprised, “how long have you been here Raven?”

“I was born into this life,” her voice was small, “I grew up with your king and his cousin. They’re the same age as I am. He’s never treated me like a maid, always a friend. I know you think he’s a monster, but he has his reasons. If it were different circumstances, a different life, I would’ve volunteered to be his wife.”

I bit my lip, feeling a pang of jealousy as her eyes scanned the field for my husband. I hated myself for being jealous that she knew him before I did. It didn’t matter, I came here to find a way to end the monster, not develop feelings for him. I shook my head, turning back to look at the men and their game they were playing.

I jumped when someone appeared behind us, “enjoying the view ladies?”

We both turned around, Raven’s cheeks blushing as she looked at the boy standing there. He was the same age as Bellamy, his dark hair falling into his eyes. His voice wasn’t as deep, his skin wasn’t as tan. He wasn’t built the same way, but he stood up straight and held an air of importance around him. I watched as his blue eyes raked up my body, I shivered under his gaze. He gave me a smile, one that told me he flirted with all the girls.

“You must be the queen,” he didn’t move to bow, he just held out his hand, “I’m Finn, the king’s right hand man as well as his cousin.”

I looked at Raven and she shook her head, looking away from us. I took his hand, thinking he would shake it. But instead he brought it up to his lips and kissed it gently, making me blush now, “Clarke.”

“Oh I know your name,” he dropped my hand, just as I realized he was holding a sword in his other one. He must be getting ready to join them, “it’s not everyday that your cousin finally lets one of his brides live. Everyone knows your name by now. I just didn’t realize you were this beautiful.”

I sensed him before I saw his face. I looked behind Finn and met Bellamy’s gaze. He was staring at me, the circles around his eyes were darker. He cleared his throat, “alright Finn, stop hitting on my wife. Go practice, lord knows you need to handle your weapon better.”

Finn rolled his eyes, “yeah you say that after I taught you everything you know.”

He excused himself and walked into the field, choosing an opponent. Bellamy stood across from me, Raven looking at us and then turning away. I nodded my head, watching as his guards stood around us, “Clarke.”

“My lord,” I bowed slightly but he caught my wrist before I pulled my dress up.

“I told you not to call me that,” his deep voice sent shivers down my spine. Or maybe it was the fact that he was holding my wrist gently, his skin warm against mine. I gasped for a moment, before he released me, his eyes softening as I cleared my own throat this time.

I smiled, the same smile I gave him last night, “I’m sorry. Bellamy,” I raised an eyebrow as his guard looked at me, “I didn’t think I would see you today.”

His eyes swept over me, “well I didn’t know you would find your way here. What are you doing out here anyways? It’s not safe for you to watch the guards practice.”

Raven opened her mouth, but I grabbed her hand to stop her from speaking, “I asked to come here. I wanted to see how powerful these guards really are,” I smiled at him and the stood up straighter, “I wanted to learn how to hold my own weapon. After all I’ve only got a few more hours left.”

Bellamy’s jaw clenched, his eyes haunted, “a lady shouldn’t be handling the weapons. She should enjoy the gardens or the castle. Not swords.”

I laughed, the sound bouncing off the walls, “well see that’s where I’m different from most ladies,” the guard closet to me kept staring, his eyes were hard and cold, “I believe a woman should always be able to defend herself. Do you really want a queen who can’t protect herself? I’m not a damsel, I am just as capable of handling that sword as this guard who’s staring at me.”

Bellamy’s hands balled up into fists beside him as he looked at the guard. His eyes snapped away from me, “Murphy stop staring,” his voice was gruff, he was angry. He looked at me, his gaze still hard. I could see he wasn’t used to being spoken to like this, “alright. I’ll teach you.”

I smiled, little did he know I didn’t need teaching. Wells had taught me everything I had ever needed to know about holding a sword. I wouldn’t let him know that though, I would listen and I would learn his strategy. I would do it better than he could ever do it, and I would take him down. I smiled as he stood there sizing me up.

Bellamy picked a smaller sword, his shoulders moving easily as he threw it up in the air and then caught it easily. He looked at me, that smirk he tried to hide last night playing on the corner of his lips again. He closed the distance between us and handed me the weapon, “alright, princess, let’s see what you’ve got. Don’t worry I’ll got easy on you.”

I raised an eyebrow at him, following him out into the field. Everyone stopped sparring the moment Bellamy was visible. They put their weapons down and watched as he chose his court. I smiled, holding my shoulders square as I stood across from him in the grass of the center court. The sun was bright, I squinted as I looked up at him. I put my feet together, holding the sword upright. I knew that was all wrong, but I had to at least pretend I didn’t know how to properly murder someone with this pointy thing.

“Put your feet shoulder width apart,” his voice was deep and gruff, everyone watching us. Finn cleared his throat, Raven shaking her head at the king’s cousin. I could see something between them, he might flirt with me but there was clearly something between those two.

I did as I was told, Bellamy nodded, the smile fading from his lips, “good. Alright don’t hold it straight, hold it diagonal from you. Like you were going to strike me.”

My eyes went wide, my heart sunk as I thought about striking him. I was supposed to want to kill him, yet the words alone made me stop. It was like he read my mind, like he knew I was plotting his demise before he could decide on mine. I took in a breath and moved the sword, Finn sighing loudly.

“Bellamy I don’t think this is something you should be doing,” he sounded like a child, “I mean no queen should be fighting, let alone one that won’t have to defend herself.”

I looked at the dark haired boy, standing beside my hand maiden. She pulled her hand away from his as my eyes washed over him. I smiled, it wasn’t pleasant, it wasn’t the polite smile of a queen, “what you’re saying is the king shouldn’t waste his time because this time tomorrow I’ll be dead, right?”

Finn’s face paled as he shook his head, stuttering, “no that’s, that’s not what I meant,” he ran his hand down his chin, I could tell I made him nervous, “I just don’t think this is something you two should be doing. What if someone gets hurt?”

I raised my eyebrows at him. I shrugged my shoulders, “what if he ends up killing me? Then the deed has been done and no one has to worry about the mess in the morning.”

“Dammit Clarke,” he spit my name out hard, his eyes narrow, “stop putting words in my mouth. I am not your husband who apparently lets you speak that way to him. I’m trying to make you two see that this isn’t what a king and queen do on their down time.”

I opened my mouth to say something else, but Bellamy beat me, “enough,” he had his hands on his hips watching us, “if this is what Clarke wants, then I will teach her. She won’t even get a scratch on me, Finn. Don’t worry.”

I rolled my eyes, turning back around to face my opponent, who also happened to be my husband. It was strange to realize how twenty four hours about my plan hadn’t taken action. Now I was married, I had survived the first night in the dragon’s layer. My entire life had changed in the course of twenty four hours.

My form improved as I stood up taller, stepping into the circle towards Bellamy. He held his sword out to defend himself, watching my very slow movements, “care to make this interesting, my lord?”

His eyes were dark as the words left my lips, “what did you have in mind princess?”

I hated that word as much as he hated me calling him lord. I smiled, “if I win you tell me a secret. If you win, I’ll tell you a secret.”

We both knew what the other wanted to know. He wanted answers as to why I volunteered, I wanted to know why they had to die. He looked at Finn who was still angry that we were sparring, then smiled at me. In my short time knowing him I learned it was rare to get a smile out of the king, “alright.”

I lunged for him before he realized we were starting our little game. I was fast, my size was my strength. I could move faster than Bellamy, his muscles would slow him down as I threw the sword towards him. I heard one of the guards telling Finn they didn’t like this, but he sighed and stayed quiet. I hit Bellamy’s shoulder, letting the point fall before it did any damage. He was smiling as I fought him.

Bellamy took a wrong step, his foot hitting a loose rock in the soil. He stumbled, I made my move. I lunged for him, pushing him back with my hands, grabbing his arm and twisting it around his back. I had my sword at his throat, one slice and he would be done. I could end this mission right here and now, he would live and I would be victorious. But the guards were watching, everyone was watching.

I couldn’t do it even without the audience.

“I see I underestimated you princess,” he words were strained against his throat as I held him hostage.

I laughed, “must people do,” I let out a breath, feeling pride course through my veins as I stood above him. 

I was just about to hand him another smart comment, before his guard grabbed my waist and pulled me away. I screamed, surprised by the foreign hands touching me. I dropped the sword, it barely missed hitting his knee as he stood up, spinning around to see what the cause of my alarm was.

“Murphy,” he was angry, I could hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes, “don’t you touch her.”

“She was going to kill you, sir. My job is to keep you safe,” his hands were still on me, they were moving down my sides. I squirmed, trying not to let the disgust show in my face, but I hated the way his hands felt dirty against my skin.

Bellamy stepped closer, I pushed Murphy’s hands away as he looked at his king. I took in a deep breath, “I said let her go. She wasn’t going to hurt me.”

His hands fell down and I realized this monster thought I belonged to him. He looked at me like I was an object in this castle that he saw value in. Somewhere during this game he was playing he had decided I was his property, no one else was allowed to touch. Little did he realize I wasn’t his property, I was my own person. I wouldn’t let Wells defend me, I wouldn’t let this monster do it either.

“Are you okay?” whatever had changed my mind earlier about hurting him was gone. I was suddenly angry that he thought I wasn’t his wife, I was his property.

I pulled my hands away before he could touch me, “I’m fine,” I looked at him hard. He looked concerned, “I can take care of myself, my _lord_.”

He looked hurt, “Clarke.”

I shook my head, “I forgot I don’t matter here, sorry,” I bowed for him before he could see the tears in my eyes, “I won’t distract you again, my king.”

I spun away before he could watch the tears fall down my cheek. I wouldn’t let the monster see he had won this round. Because I was already calculating my next move, pretty soon the monster would be put down for good.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke continues to weave her story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize now for leaving you with this chapter this weekend. I am going to a festival, so the updates will resume on monday! Hope you like this chapter =)

I was exhausted from learning how to fight, but I wouldn’t let myself sleep. I waited for Bellamy, the hours ticking by slowly. He showed up earlier than he had the night before, but still later than he should’ve. He didn’t kiss me, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me to the bed. His hands were warm as they ran down my sides. He was gentle this time, he took his time undressing me. His eyes were soft, his body warm against mine. It was like this was our first time, but it wasn’t. Still I was grateful he didn’t kiss me. If he had I might have forgotten why I was here.

Even though we had a disagreement earlier, he still found his way to my bed. It was interesting, the way he didn’t apologize or ask me if I was over whatever had made me angry. He just touched his palm to mine and took me as if I did belong to him. Maybe I was his property, if a marriage was empty did that mean it was nothing more than a legal binding? I had to bit my tongue hard to stop the tears that were caught in my throat.

Once we were finished, I pulled my robe on. I grabbed the pillow behind me, holding it between my legs. I took in a breath, watching Bellamy as he sat next to me, his shirt still laying on the floor. He was handsome, I couldn’t stop thinking about how handsome he was. My mind was yelling that this wasn’t true, he was good to look at but he was a soulless creature. Someone so beautiful shouldn’t be living in this world without his soul.

I thought about our bet earlier, I had been too upset to get my answer. I ran my hand along the seam of the pillow, my heart beating fast, “Bellamy,” he seemed to like whenever I called his name, “do you remember what you agreed to during our sparring?”

He raised an eyebrow, “I never forget anything.”

I tried not to smile at how cocky he sounded. The one side of lip curled up higher than the other side, his hair was tousled from moments ago. Sitting there with him I realized why he wasn’t threatening. He looked younger, he didn’t look like a monster. It was these moments that I felt myself falter, I pulled back, too afraid to slay the dragon when he was taking on the shell of a human.

“So then do I get to ask my question?”

He cleared his throat, “I don’t go back on my word. But I must tell you that if you ask me why they all must die, I cannot answer that. So choose your question wisely or you’ll waste your chance at getting to know me.”

I watched him, his eyes never found mine as he spoke. He couldn’t look at me when he talked about their deaths, I wondered if he hurt to lose them. Before I came here I thought this was a game, a rouse to keep the kingdom under control. I knew now that this was something more, something evil was at work and it wasn’t the king who was doing it. He had no control over what was happening inside his castle.

I wanted justice for Harper, but I also wanted to understand the man who was my husband.

I nodded my head slowly, the question changing as I opened my mouth, “why did you stop the guards? I know I asked, I know I told you the story, but you could’ve lived without knowing the ending. I’m sure the others begged for their lives harder than I did.”

Bellamy let out a slow breath, his fingers grazing the blanket. His brown eyes found mine, like he was searching the air between us for the words he couldn’t find. After more than a moment of silence I thought we were at a standstill. I didn’t think he would be answering my question. Then he sighed loudly, clearing his throat.

“Because you didn’t beg,” he kept his voice low, “you knew what was to come, even before last night, when you volunteered. You had a motive when you raised your hand and took mine for marriage. I am just as curious as you are,” he gave me that small smile, “I like a challenge. You seem like a challenge.”

I gave him a smile, the one I used when no one else around, “thank you. For giving me an honest answer. I think this is the first conversation we’ve had where you haven’t lied to me.”

His eyes went dark for a second, “I’ve never lied to you, Clarke. I promise you that I will never lie to you either. As long as you can promise the same for me.”

I bit my lip, wondering if he was going to stop the guards once more. There was more to the story, I was getting ready to go into the grounders. I smiled, knowing that if I was given more time on earth I wouldn’t spend it lying to someone I was married to. I hated liars, I always told the truth, even when Octavia was heartbroken when she heard the news about our mom.

The truth might be ugly, but it wouldn’t be any prettier if you sugar coated it.

“I will never lie to you,” I whispered, his jaw relaxed as he ran his hands down his chest. I couldn’t help but notice at how good he looked without his shirt on. I had to stop myself from staring, reminding myself that I wasn’t allowed to have this moment for long. Raven’s words came back to me. I couldn’t believe he never came to the room of his wives before. It surprised me, but then again Bellamy didn’t seem like the type to use women that way.

My hatred was slipping, the monster was fading. Bellamy had a face and a heart. Something I didn’t realize could be possible.

“So,” his voice startled me, I jumped as he pulled the blanket over his legs, “will you finish the story you were telling me yesterday?”

There was a touch of excitement in his eyes, like he was ready to hear more about the children from space. I raised an eyebrow at him, “tell me, king Bellamy, why do you like stories so much?”

He shrugged, “I like the way you tell the story. I don’t like a story that doesn’t end.”

I nodded, “you like the endings all tied up neatly, right? Well I can assure you this story doesn’t have a nice, neat ending.”

“Not everyone is fortunate enough to have that kind of ending, one that’s painless,” his words were soft, his eyes staring at his hands, “what happened earlier? Why did you get upset with me?”

I held the pillow tightly, wondering if I should make up a lie and say I wasn’t feeling well. Then again we had just said we wouldn’t lie to each other. I knew I should tell him the truth about Murphy and how I didn’t like him. He was scum, he was a guard waiting for the right moment to take what belonged to Bellamy. I sighed and then brought my eyes up to his.

I didn’t even know what would happen when I opened my mouth, “I don’t belong to anyone, Bellamy. I am my own person, even if that person happens to be your wife.”

This time the king raised his eyebrows as he stared back at me. Slowly he smiled, his fingers tapping against his knee, “I never said you belonged to me.”

“You insinuated it. I didn’t like it.”

He clicked his tongue, something he did whenever he was thinking, “okay. I won’t do it again. Now do you forgive me?”

My eyes went wide, such a big question to ask someone like me. He had killed my family, he was going to kill me come morning light. I could never forgive him, but I couldn’t let him know all the things I was planning. I let out a slow breath and nodded my head. I couldn’t say the words out loud. I couldn’t lie to his face, no matter how much I hated him. 

“Good,” he sat up straighter, “can we finish the story now?”

“Sure,” I scratched my arm, “we uh, we left off with their two choices. Okay so they knew they had limited time to make their choice. The adults in charge thought they could buy themselves more time by sending the prisoners to the ground. There were a hundred children under eighteen, waiting to be reviewed. So they set up a ship and decided they would test the ground. If the kids survived the radiation soaked planet, then they would start their own journey to the ground.”

Bellamy looked surprised, “so they were willing to kill these kids for the sake of an experimentation?”

I ran my hand along the blanket, taking a moment to appreciate the feeling of the fabric against my skin. I wouldn’t be able to feel these things soon. I wondered what the afterworld was like. I wondered if I would find Harper and we could discuss what had happened to us. I wondered if I could watch out for Octavia the same way I did when I was alive.

I swallowed the lump in my throat that always came along with the memories of my sister, “yes they were. Because they didn’t see them as children, they saw them as criminals. Some were murderers, some were thieves. They all committed crimes that would’ve been punished the right way had they been eighteen. So sending them to earth would kill two birds with one stone.”

“Your mom has quiet the imagination,” his voice was soft. He looked like he was going to reach for me, I was shivering in the cold castle. But then he thought better of it and decided not to. I took in a deep breath and realized he had remembered I thought him this was my mom’s story.

I smiled as I remembered my mom, her gentle hands, her beautiful smile. She had always been strong, she had been my rock before the world took her away from me. My dad always told me I looked like her. It was in the eyes, she had the same shade of blue eyes that would light up with any emotion we felt.

“Yeah,” I finally whispered, the lump getting bigger as I realized how much I missed my mom, “she did.”

We were both quiet as we sat there staring at our own hands. I took in a deep breath wondering what his story was. He didn’t offer me anything, he just listened to me as I told my fictional one. I stole a glance at the king, wondering if he was hiding more scars than any of the kingdom knew about.

Bellamy was staring at me, “what happened to her?”

I shook my head, “she got sick,” I pushed down the tears, “we couldn’t save her.”

He nodded his head, silent as we looked at each other. He let out a slow breath, waiting for me to continue. I wiped at the tears that didn’t make it out of my eyes and then took in a deep breath. 

“So they shuttled the hundred prisoners into the ship. They didn’t tell them where they were going or why until they were on their way down. Some of them got scared, saying they were going to die. Others unbuckled their belts, floating around until the ship hit gravity. They were the first ones to die,” I swallowed slowly, Bellamy’s fingers laying really close to mine. I couldn’t help but notice how close we were sitting, “they made it to the earth. Two kids were dead, everyone else shaken up. They opened the doors, met with the beautiful sky.”

Bellamy looked surprised, “no radiation?”

I shook my head, “not yet anyways. The air wasn’t toxic for them, they were children of the sky. They would survive on the ground.”

The light hadn’t yet gathered around the edges of the window, “but that wasn’t their only concern. They weren’t the only ones on the ground. There were people living here. They were angry the ship had crashed, they wouldn’t let these sky people take their land.”

Bellamy looked at me hard, “this is a different story. You’re trying to trick me.”

“No!” my voice went up an octave, “no this is the same story. There’s just more. You can’t end the story with them ending up on earth.”

He shook his head, “you said it was a messy ending. How can this be a messy ending when they haven’t even stepped onto earth? How do they know about these other people?”

“Bellamy,” I said his name, but he looked away. He stood up, his hands were in fists. All the softness had left him, he was the same cold man I had married a few nights ago.

He kept his shoulders square, “I won’t be made a fool. I thought you weren’t like the others. I was wrong, you don’t beg. You manipulate.”

He had his back towards me, his hand on the doorknob. I let out a sob, realizing that it hadn’t worked. Even our conversation earlier, when he told me I was different didn’t matter. For some reason he was going to leave me here to face the wrath all the others had faced. I closed my eyes, the tears gathering in my eyes as I imagined Harper once more. She was the only comfort I found when I realized I was back where I started.

The dawn hadn’t yet arrive, the door slammed closed behind him. The sound cut through the castle like a knife. I jumped slightly, trying my hardest not to fall apart. Just like that I was at back the beginning. I didn’t stop the tears as they fell, I knew now I was just waiting to die. The guards would come, I had survived one night too long. Now I had to face the execution I knew would be waiting for me when the light filled my room.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dawn has arrive and Clarke must meet her fate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I didn't lose anyone with the long wait for this next chapter. Originally they were combined, but I thought a good cliffhanger couldn't hurt anyone! Bare with me you will find out more about the king in the coming chapters I PROMISE! I have to drag it out because the ending is just so much fun.
> 
> Also I must tell you I am not ending my story the same as the one I based it off of. My details and plot twists are different and should you choose to read The Dawn and the Wrath you will not know the ending I promise! thanks for reading. Look for another update tomorrow =)

I didn’t sleep, I stayed awake watching the light fill the corner of the blinds. I took in deep breaths, wondering just when they would come to get me. Finally when the sun had touched the top of the sky, the knock sounded on my door. My heart stopped, I stayed silent. Maybe they would think I wasn’t here, maybe they’d go looking for Bellamy and he would’ve changed his mind by then. I knew it was a childish wish, but I couldn’t stop holding onto the hope that somehow, someway I would survive this monster.

They didn’t knock twice. Instead they threw open the door and looked at me, “Clarke Griffin, it’s time.”

I looked at Murphy, he looked like he was enjoying this, “I won’t beg,” I said standing up and letting my hands drop to my sides. I stood up off the bed and stood up straight, Murphy’s hand going to the small of my back, “where’s Bellamy?”

“He doesn’t like to watch it happen,” Raven’s voice startled me. She was standing there, her eyes red and puffy. She had been crying, she had been crying for me.

I squeezed her hand, “even if it was only for one day, I’m glad I met you. I’m glad you were my friend.”

She hugged me tightly before Murphy pulled me out of the room. The only sound I could hear was the beating of my heart. It was fast and it was loud, telling me that this was the last time I would get to feel anything. The castle tiles were cold underneath my bare feet, the air rushing  through the silk robe. I could feel the sun, barely hitting me through the big windows. We walked silently towards the courtyard. I knew there was a noose waiting for me.

I closed my eyes and prayed that my mom would be there waiting for me. I prayed that Octavia would be okay, that she wouldn’t cry when she heard I was gone. She had to be strong, she was the only family my dad had left. I could only hope Wells was strong for both of them. I knew he could fall apart with the best of them, especially when it came to me.

We came to a stop in front of two large brown doors. They opened easily, welcoming me to my death. There was a woman standing on the far end, near the doors that led outside. I could see the sun kissing the sky as she held up the rope. She looked through me, as if I didn’t exist. It was like I didn’t even matter to these people. I was just another wife, another execution scheduled. There would be another one after me, and then one after that.

My heart hurt as I realized I probably wouldn’t even get a proper funeral. There was probably somewhere where all the bodies were buried, unmarked graves for the girls Bellamy had left behind.

“Mama,” my voice was soft as I stepped towards the woman, Murphy ready to grab me if I tried to run, “I tried mama. I’m sorry.”

I ran my hand over the locket I hid beneath my robe. I always thought I had my mother’s strength, but I was folding in the face of death. She had been strong even at the end. She didn’t let death scare her, she knew that she had lived a good life, she had left behind two daughters who would live to see a future. I wasn’t that strong, I was trying as hard as I could not to break down, the tears were ready to spill as I stepped up on the wooden block. 

I wouldn’t get to see a future. I wouldn’t get to see my baby sister get married to Lincoln, the only man who could handle her. I wouldn’t get to see my father hold his first grandchild. I wouldn’t get to have him walk me down the isle, or tell me he loved me one last time. I pushed all the pain away as I closed my eyes, ready to face what I knew would happen when I stepped into his castle.

I had tried. I might have failed to take down the monster, but I had tried and succeed for longer than any other girls that were in his home. It wasn’t much, but I felt proud that I had lived a night longer than all the others. It was like I mattered to the king, even if it was only for the last forty eight hours. Maybe the time he had spent with me would make him realize how terrible this whole mission was. Maybe he would put an end to it, if only he fell in love with another wife. Maybe he would open his heart, because I had tried to find it inside his chest.

The rope was cold as it touched my skin, or maybe it was the hands holding it. Either way I shivered, still not ready to meet my end. I still had so much to do, there was still so much unsaid. I took in a final breath, wondering what the point was because soon it would be cut off for good. Then I closed my eyes, ignoring the voices around me.

It didn’t take long, the rope pulled as she stepped back. The bruise was forming, I could feel it as I chocked on the air trying to escape my throat. I got light headed, fumbling to find the ground beneath me. I shrugged against the hold, but it was no use. I could feel my body shutting down. I could feel the air leaving my lungs, the blood draining from my head. There were spots dancing behind my eyes.

There was a commotion behind me, I couldn’t see what was happening. I stopped fighting, letting go to the darkness that was starting to find me. The spots faded, my hands falling beside me. Before I could surrender completely, there were hands grabbing me. A deep voice was yelling and I heard a fist hitting flesh.

“Get her down!” the voice belonged to someone I knew, I couldn’t place it. My mind was fuzzing as the air came rushing back into my lungs, my heart panicking for oxygen. My eyes were still closed as I felt someone pulling the rope from around my neck. 

I felt a warm hand against my cheek, “Clarke. Clarke open your eyes.”

I coughed as Bellamy’s strong arms picked me up and cradled me against his chest. I opened my eyes and looked up, “what?”

He shook his head as Finn told everyone to get back. I coughed, my throat burning from the lack of oxygen. Bellamy looked angry, but his hold was gentle, his touch was sincere. His eyes were staring into mine as he ran his thumb gently against my neck. His skin was warm as touched the purple bruise that ran along my throat.

“I couldn’t let them take you away,” his voice broke and I realized we were alone. We had made it back to my bedroom, his eyes were sparkling with what I assumed to be tears. I was surprised, I didn’t know he could cry, “I haven’t felt this way in a long time.”

I couldn’t talk, my voice was gone for the moment. My heart was racing, my body adjusting to the shock of surviving the attack. Bellamy set me down on the bed and took my hand in his. I squeezed his fingers, a thank you for saving my life. He gave me another one of those rare smiles.

“You give me hope,” he pushed my blonde hair behind my ear, “I thought I lost the ability to hope, but then I me you and all it took was one look into these blue eyes and I forgot everything I’ve ever done. I’m sorry.”

I smiled back at him, taking in gulps of air like they were the richest wine in the world. I put my hand against his cheek, “thank you,” my voice was strained.

Bellamy nodded, then stood up, “you should get some rest. I’ll find Raven and tell her you need her.”

I closed my eyes, suddenly exhausted from everything that had happened. I laid my head down on the pillow, listening to his footsteps leave the room. I couldn’t help but wonder what had changed, he had been ready to let them kill me. Then suddenly he was beating up his own guards to save my life. I couldn’t think about it too hard, because the minute I did I would forget why I was here.

I didn’t cry as I fell asleep, instead I dreamt of ropes and nooses, ready to save me from the nightmare I hadn’t prepared myself to step into.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke Survived the Dawn. But can she survive the castle?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so we are MOVING FORWARD with Bellarke... Finally. This chapter is the first glimpse at the king and his softening heart that comes with Clarke. Trust me it's been hard dragging out their love for this long. Patience they will finally realize their feelings soon.
> 
> Enjoy =)

"So he just saved you and hasn't been back?" Ravens eyes were wide as she watched me sketch the outline of the king. When I woke up this afternoon after the execution attempt, Raven was there to greet me. I hadn’t seen Bellamy since he carried me to bed. I wasn’t sure I wanted to see him just yet. I was still processing what had happened. I couldn’t stop thinking about what he said, the way his eyes looked haunted. So I did what I always did when the world got to be too much for me. I started to draw.

I nodded, letting out a slow breath, “yeah, he hasn’t been back,” I looked up and met her big brown eyes, “before he left he told me he was sorry. He said I gave him hope.”

She smiled, trying hard not to squeal, "I knew it! Finn and I, we knew that first night he told the guards to back off there was something special about you. You’ve got something special. You’ve got to tell me what you did to make him fall in love.”

I rolled my eyes, I wasn’t ready to address my feelings about the king just yet. I was still set on taking him out, but something was holding me back from doing it. So I changed the subject, "you and Finn huh? I see you two flirting whenever we're around them.”

She laughed, her cheeks turning bright red, "please Finn flirts with everyone you included.”

"That may be but he has a soft spot for you. You’re his favorite to flirt with," I drew his eyes, putting the light I saw our first night together in them. I smudged the lines under his eyes, making his face more realistic.

She shrugged, "it doesn't matter, I'm just a maid and he's the king’s cousin, second hand man. He would never choose me if he even had a choice. He'll marry a princess, someone of royal blood.”

I raised an eyebrow at her, "I'm not a princess and the king married me.”

She stopped folding clothes, "yes but the circumstances are different.”

Ravens face went pale. Just as I was about to tell her I was kidding, she bolted to the bathroom. I heard her get sick, I stood up and followed. She had her hair wrapped around her hand, her face in the toilet. She looked hot, like she had the flu.

"Are you okay?" I asked when she stood up and rinsed her mouth out, "you should lay down you look terrible.”

She laughed, "thanks," she pressed her cold hands against her forehead, "I'm fine. I just got nauseous.”

I grabbed her hand and pulled her back into my room, forcing her to sit down on my bed. I looked at her waiting for her to speak. When she didn’t I sighed, "you aren't getting up until you tell me what's wrong. You were fine two seconds ago.”

She sighed, "I'm fine. Just overworked. There hasn't been an actual queen for me to care for in a while."

I crossed my arms over my chest, raising an eyebrow. She kept staring at me, waiting for me to let her go. I didn't buy it and she knew it, "Raven I thought we were friends.”

"We are," she looked down at her hands, "I uh. This morning I found out that I might be pregnant.”

I couldn't help myself I jumped up and hugged her, "oh my god! That's amazing, wait," I pulled back and saw how quiet she had gotten, "you're not happy?”

She wiped away a tear, "I'd be happier if I knew things would work out. This is just another child born into the slavery that is this kingdom.”

"Who's the father?" 

I couldn't help myself, I wanted to tell her that things would work out. She didn't look like she would believe me. She shook her head, "I'm not telling you.”

I knew right then who it was, our earlier conversation hitting me all at once, "you need to tell Finn.”

"What? How did you? Ugh I can see why the king gets so frustrated with you!" She threw her hands up in the air. 

I laughed, "and yet I'm still here in the castle. Trust me Raven you need to tell him. It's his baby too," I put my hand on her shoulder, "he'll be thrilled. He loves you.”

She rolled her eyes, "he loves himself and no one else."

I shook my head as the cook brought my afternoon tea into the room. She smiled, her eyes darting between me and Raven, "everything is delicious, my grace. I made it myself.”

"Thank you," I smiled as she bowed and then sent her on her way. I took in a deep breath, going back to my drawing, "my mom was terrified when she became pregnant with me.”

Raven was quiet, her hands in her lap. She was trying not to cry, "she thought I would die during birth, or that she wouldn't be a good mother. Everyone has fears for their children, Raven. The key to making it work is embracing those fears. That way they don't own you, you own them.”

She smiled, "I'm starting to understand just why the king has taken to you," she threw her arms around me, hugging me tightly. I laughed as she kissed my cheek.

There was a knock on my door, startling us both. Murphy walked through the door, "the king wanted me to check on you," his hands were fiddling with something I couldn't see. Raven rolled her eyes.

"I am perfectly capable of keeping an eye on my queen," she didn't like him, I could see it in her eyes. I’m glad someone else felt the same as me, "go away.”

He laughed, walking towards me and the drawing, "well I don't disobey orders. So Clarke can tell me if she's okay then I'll report back to the king.”

"Why didn't he come and ask himself?" I looked down at my drawing wondering when I would see him again. He had left me alone for more than half the day after saving me from his execution. I wanted to ask him what that meant.

I wasn't ready to wander the halls of the castle again just yet. 

Murphy was watching me, "he is very busy, my queen. I came on his behalf.”

I glanced back at Raven and she sighed. Murphy's hands were still once again as I looked back at him, "please tell my husband I am fine. But next time he should come and ask me himself, no matter how busy he is.”

Murphy nodded and then turned to leave as quickly as he came. Raven stood up and walked to the table, "do you think I could share your tea with you? Maybe it'll calm my stomach down.”

I nodded, "of course mommy.”

She laughed as we set out plates for the food and then I poured the tea into my cup. It looked different as I poured it into hers. The sugar I added dissolved quickly, giving it a hint of green coloring. I ate a piece of bread, watching Raven drink her warm liquid slowly.

"How come you never talk about your family?" she asked setting the cup back down.

I shrugged, "my mom died when I was young. I took it upon myself to take care of my little sister. My dad, he threw himself into work to avoid the grief that comes with losing your best friend. It wasn't perfect, but we were still a family.”

"I'm sorry," she grabbed my hand, squeezing my fingers gently, "I bet she'd be so proud of you. You're so strong and beautiful.”

I blushed, "my dad told me before I married Bellamy that I have my mom’s strength, her will to make things right. Sometimes I can feel her guiding me.”

I picked up my cup slowly, the green color was gone. Raven watched me, I sniffed the tea. It didn't smell different, but I kept staring at it like it had two heads. She pulled her hand away from mine quickly, grabbing the cup.

"Don't drink that!" She moved so quickly the tea spilled over the top and onto the table. 

I looked at her surprised as she put it down. Her voice had been so loud the guard outside came running in. It was Miller, followed by Finn. They both looked panicked as they took in the scene.

Ravens voice was shaking, "someone poisoned her tea," she looked at Finn.

"That can't be possible. The cook brought it herself. I watched her make the food," Finn looked nervous. He was watching me, I wasn't sure how to react. Maybe he thought I was going to fall over dead and he would have to find the way to tell Bellamy. I knew the entire castle was wary of me. After he saved me everyone wasn’t sure how to handle my presence.

Raven stood up taller, the guards looking between each other, "you drink it then.”

Finn looked at Raven and she stood up taller. She put her hands on her hips and he shook his head, “it looks weird.”

She smiled, knowing she was right, “I am certain that someone within these walls just tried to kill the queen.”

 

—-

 

I ran my hands up and down my arms, the castle was suddenly freezing. My body was shaking, from the lack of sleep and the attempt on my life this morning I'm sure. I wasn't scared, I wouldn't let myself be scared. I knew the risk when I volunteered for this. I just never thought I'd make friends. I never thought I'd be afraid to eat my food. I never thought my feelings would start to confuse me.

I never thought I would want Bellamy to comfort me; but I did.

I sat down on my bed, Raven had been gone for a while now. I shivered again, trying to warm myself up. I closed my eyes, footsteps stomping outside my door. Before I could open my eyes the door flew open and I heard his voice.

"Clarke," my heart stopped, for reasons I didn't understand. He was alone, his guards weren't with him. I heard the click of the lock, I opened my eyes as he knelt in front of me. I was staring at the ground, his hand reaching for me. The tips of his fingers hovered under my chin, like he was afraid to apply pressure and scare me away.

Finally he pushed, my eyes finding his, "I'm fine," my voice was shaking as I let out a shaky breath, "I'm fine, Bellamy.”

He clicked his tongue, "this wasn't my doing. I made it clear this morning," he shook his head, angry at someone that wasn't me, "I told you the truth. I stopped the execution because you are my wife.”

I looked at him, my eyes filling with tears, "well someone else disagrees with that. Because I almost drank the tea. If Raven hadn't stopped me we wouldn't be having this conversation.”

"Trust me I will find whoever did this and they will pay. Attempting to murder you is an attempt on my life as well," my eyes went wide as he squeezed my knee gently.

Bellamy was protecting me. The monster was soft, I had a chance at finding his weakness. He stopped the guards from strangling me, now he was declaring it a capital offense if someone else tried to take me out. This wasn't supposed to happen, we weren't supposed to become friends. We were enemies, unspoken enemies. He had taken away everything from my family.

And yet there I sat, staring into his dark eyes, waiting for him to tell me it would all be okay. I struggled in a breath, "you don't have to protect me. After all we both know I volunteered for this.”

His hand fell away from my face and I watched as he tried to conceal the emotions that played across his face, "I've been waiting a long time to find someone like you. I don't care about the consequences. I," he paused, his voice harder than before, "this kingdom needs a queen like you.”

I smiled, my hand settling on his cheek, "and to think I was going to be executed this morning before you figured that out.”

His lip twitched, "yeah well it's a good thing I did," he leaned into my touch, his skin like fire against mine. It sent a spark down my spine, a shiver straight to my heart. 

"Thank you for checking on me," I looked behind him, the room was empty, "if it's not too much to ask could we maybe find some more time like this?”

He smiled, it was small, but it was there. His eyes told me more than anything else, "anything for you my queen," his lips grazed my wrist, a gesture I was surprised by.

He stood up, "can I expect to see you tonight?”

Bellamy nodded, watching as I pulled my sweater on, "nothing could keep me away from our story time.”

I smiled, it was real and I couldn't stop it from spreading across my face, "I'll be waiting. I hope you're early.”

He gave me one last nod and the left my room. It was colder without him, I shivered once more. I realized he had warmed me up the moment he stepped into the room. I closed my eyes, this was too hard. I was confused, my emotions were all over the place because I was stuck here alone with no one else to confide in.

I might have survived the dawn, but I knew no matter what happened next, my heart wouldn't survive Bellamy.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Bellamy share a moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This scene was fun to write. I'm loving the slow burn, but of course I can't stretch it out any longer. Bellarke has finally arrive =)

I refused to think about the king as anything other than a monster. Sure he had saved me, called off the second execution that would’ve ended my life. That didn’t mean I would forgive him, I couldn’t forgive him. Not when Harper was all I could see as I walked down that hallway. I wondered if she had been scared, if she had thought of me and the rest of her family as they wrapped the rope around her neck. No I couldn’t let him get under my skin, no matter what he said or did.

I was here to end his torturous reign on this kingdom. 

Raven seemed surprised to see the finished product that was my drawing. She smiled, impressed with my talents as she called them. Drawing was a hobby, it wouldn’t save me. Still I always appreciated someone who told me I had a good eye. My art was important to me, just as everything else I held close was.

As I waited for Bellamy, I wandered out into the castle. I had made my way out into the evening air. The sun was still up in the sky, it was warm and beautiful. The wind was blowing, causing goose bumps to form on my arms. I closed my eyes as I took in the night air, wondering what Harper would’ve done had she been granted more time.

Would she have tried to escape? No, she was brave. I can still remember the day she broke her arm falling out of the big oak tree outside her house. She didn’t even shed a tear, she let her dad pull and prod it as he made the cast. Harper had been fearless, another reason why we were best friends. 

Wells had been heart broken when we found out that the king picked Harper to become his next victim. Wife hadn’t been the right word back then, because it wasn’t reality. She wasn’t his wife, she was his prisoner and then his victim. Wells and Harper were supposed to get married and have enough babies to fill our village. They were almost as sickening as Octavia and Lincoln. They were happy together, they were the lucky ones.

I was the one who held his hand when we received word that she was gone. I remember the way he broke down, his tears falling without a sound. He squeezed my fingers, his best friend was gone. The love of his life would never kiss him goodnight. I couldn’t even imagine what he was feeling, because I had never been in love before. Not the kind of love they shared.

I tried top pick up his pieces before I picked up my own. of course he was half the reason I was here inside this kingdom. Wells’s heartbreak had fueled my hatred and heartache for the king. Now here I was, in his castle, falling for him. At least I was trying to talk myself out of whatever it was I was feeling. I couldn’t possible feel anything but hatred for the person who had taken away my best friend.

Could I?

I willed away the tears that had gathered. I was done crying. My friend was gone, the tears wouldn’t bring her back. All I could do was bring justice to her name.  

I opened my eyes, walking out into the middle of the yard. I wondered if Harper had seen the beauty this castle held, before she was walked out onto that balcony to her death. There was more beauty here than one would realize, if you looked past the evil that clouded every corner of this place. Even Bellamy held some beauty, if you dusted off his heavy shoulders. That was something I never thought was possible.

I sat down slowly, pulling my dress under my knees as I let my legs out hang in front of me. I took in a deep breath, looking down at my hands. As I sat there I realized that killing the king wouldn’t bring Harper back to me or Wells. It wouldn’t solve any problems, it would only cause more. Another body would be added to the count, whatever family he had in this kingdom would mourn him.

He might be a monster, but there was a soul hiding behind his eyes. Finn would hurt if he was gone. People would riot for his title. There would be total chaos within the walls as well as outside them. No killing Bellamy wasn’t the answer to everything he had done. But now I wasn’t sure what the answer was.

My plan was slowly changing. Before I even knew it, I no longer wanted him dead. Now I wanted to understand. I wanted to understand him and everything that had happened before he saved me. If he offered me the truth, maybe we could find a way out together.

Somehow I had let him get to me. Even before he saved me from the execution, I didn’t stop myself from imagining his strong arms wrapped around me. I didn’t forget the way he touched me, ever so gently, our first night as husband and wife. The memory was still burned inside my head.

I smiled to myself, imagining a different life with Bellamy, one that didn’t have secrets and stories that kept us alive. I thought of a life where I could actually fall in love with my husband because he was a man everyone respected. My heart yearned for that life, for the man I imagined Bellamy to be. This kingdom was holding him back. Maybe I could find a way to bring that man to me.

I heard the door open and I knew he was there behind me. I had started to sense him, my body asking for him to touch me, or talk to me. Sometimes I thought about kissing those freckles that lined his face. I shook my head, blushing as he walked towards me. 

How long does it take for people to fall in love? Some believe if it’s the right half of your soul, it takes no time at all. I was started to wonder if they were on to something. Because one look from Bellamy was all it took to make me forget every single reason why it was wrong to fall for him.

"Clarke," his voice was deep, but it was soft and sincere. Even though I had been waiting for him, but this time I didn't fear the dawn, "you weren't in your room. I got worried. After this afternoon, I thought something happened.”

I smiled as he sat down on the grass across from me, "I'm fine Bellamy. I just wanted to enjoy this beautiful evening. I've been shut up in my room for too long now.”

He sighed, bringing his knees up to his chest, "it is a nice night. Unfortunately it's probably the last one.”

I raised an eyebrow, wondering what that meant. But I knew the moment I asked he wouldn't give me a straight answer. I sighed, running my hands over the top of the grass, letting it tickle my palms.

I looked over at my husband, wondering what had changed his mind. He was squinting as he looked up into the sky, “I’m sorry,” his voice was soft, the wind carried it to me before the words faded away. My heart stopped, his eyes finding mine, “for letting the guards take you this morning.”

I nodded my head slowly, “I’m just glad you changed your mind.”

“I shouldn’t have had to change my mind about you. I,” he stopped, shaking his head as he took in a breath. His chest puffed up, “I think you’re exactly what this kingdom needs.”

I raised an eyebrow at him, “what about you?”

“Yeah,” his eyes never left mine, “I think you’re exactly what I’ve been looking for.”

I bit my lip, stopping the smile that spread across my face. I didn’t realize how beautiful and intense a compliment from Bellamy could be. I felt like I had finally gained access to an area no one else had ever seen. The king was closed off to everyone, but sometimes he let me into those hidden parts.

Bellamy cleared his throat, and I looked out at the beautiful kingdom that belonged to him, "what's your favorite color?”

He laughed, which surprised me more than anything else, "we've been married for five days now and you want to know my favorite color?”

I shrugged, "I want to know you, Bellamy. I don't want to be married to a man who I've only heard about in stories. Because as you learned the past few nights, stories are deceiving. I want to know your likes and dislikes. I want to understand you.”

I looked over at him and he was staring at the horizon, the sun starting to set. His eyes were glossy, like there were tears gathered in the corners. He sighed, his fingers laying on the grass between us. A desire to reach out and touch them washed over me. After he saved me from my execution, brushed his hand gently over my cheek after the poisoning, I was craving his touch.

"Blue," he turned to look at me, "like the color of your eyes.”

I blushed, "I'm partial to green myself. I love the smell of roses, but my favorite flowers are sunflowers. They're so happy and bright. My mom used to pick them out of the field and bring them home to sit on the dinner table.”

Bellamy sighed, "no one has ever cared to ask me these types of things. I've always been the king, straight to business with someone like me. But you," he turned so he was facing me, "you still surprise me."

I smiled, "good that is my goal. I don't want you to think I've grown soft in our marriage.”

He laughed, "you remind me a lot of the mother I lost. She didn't like being told what to do, or how to live either.”

I stopped getting ready for our banter when I realized he was opening up to me. He never mentioned his mother, or anyone else in his family.

I thought Finn would be the person I would ask about his past. I sat up straighter, his eyes staring at my hands.

"Well she sounds like my kind of Queen," I smiled softly at him, waiting for him to go on.

He sighed, "she was beautiful without even trying. A lot like you," he looked away, hoping I didn't hear that last bit, "but my father was controlling. He hated having a wife who wouldn't be seen and not heard. He used force to make her listen. I always promised myself I would never touch a woman the way he did. I hated him.”

I leaned closer, putting my hand over his, "Bellamy I never thought you'd hurt me. Not like that anyways.”

He nodded, "I know you think I'm a monster," his voice broke, "everyone does. They don't understand what happens here, or why it has to happen.”

"Bellamy," I said his name slowly, waiting for him to look up at me. He sighed, tears in his eyes as they looked at me, "I'm not going to ask you about it anymore. I understand you don't want to tell me.”

He laughed, it was dark and humorless, "I've upset everyone by saving you. It's not supposed to happen this way. You are supposed to die, but I can't let you.”

My heart stopped as he kept staring at me. We were getting close to my answers, but I changed the subject. Right there in the moonlight I didn't want to hear the horror stories of the kingdom. I wanted to live in a tiny little bubble, oblivious to the evil that surrounded me for a little longer.

"So your mom, did she tell you stories when you were little?”

He nodded, grateful that I didn't pry harder, "she loved telling stories. She was almost as good as you were. I loved our story time. I'd crawl onto her lap late at night and she'd start to weave a tale as amazing as any book I would read.”

I smiled, "I hope your children say the same about you one day.”

"I shouldn't have children," the humor was gone again, "I would only cause them pain. The same way I've caused this kingdom pain."

I knew I should tell him that if he gave everyone an honest answer as to why their daughters had to die, then maybe they wouldn't think of him as a monster. But he wouldn't even tell me the truth, I knew he wouldn't tell his subjects what happened behind closed doors. Although I'm sure everyone had heard that he saved me. Rumors flew around this castle faster than a fly, it had to have gotten out into the kingdom. 

I wondered if Octavia and my father had heard. I hoped they had. Maybe they wouldn't worry as much if they knew I was still alive. 

"I never thought I wanted kids. But when my mom died I took to caring for my little sister. We were pretty young, she clung to me the way she has clung to our mom. One night she looked up to me and told me she's was glad I protected her from the monsters," tears gathered in my eyes as I thought back to the night of that terrible thunder storm, "I realized that's why parents love their children so much. Because they only have unconditional love for each other.”

"Your sister is lucky," he whispered, "to have a sister as strong and brave as you. I wish I had had a sibling like that when my mom died.”

Everyone knew his mom was dead long before his father. But no one knew why. I bit my lip, trying to stop the question as it formed on my lips. After a moment of silence I sighed.

"What happened?" My voice was soft, I was afraid to break the spell we were under. I didn't want to push too hard. I didn't want him to close up on me.

Bellamy ran his hand through his curls, and then sighed loudly, "my dad was paranoid. In the last few years it took all of the castle to convince him his guards weren't going to kill him. Before that he always thought my mom was too good for him. She was, she was beautiful and sweet. She took care of me and gave me love for the both of them.”

I smiled slightly, thinking about my mother and how similar they were. Of course my father wasn't a monster. He sighed, wincing as he remembered her fate, "I was eight. She had just finished telling me my bedtime story. I used to love that, as much as I enjoy our story time," he smiled at me, "but before she could even brush a kiss on my forehead, my dad burst into the room.”

Tears gathered in his eyes as he looked away, "he accused her of sleeping with his first guard. Of course she denied it, but he held up a pregnancy test. I didn't know that's what it was at the time. Anyways she said that it wasn't hers, but he found it in their bathroom. He took her away screaming. She screamed for me, for her life. I can still hear her screaming," he closed his eyes hard, "I followed. I shouldn't have, but I went to their bedroom. He had a dagger to her throat, insisting she tell the truth. She said she was, and then he went silent.”

I gasped as his hands started to shake. I wanted to reach out and steady them, but I stayed still, afraid I would break the spell he was under, "he slit her throat. I can still remember her eyes losing their light. Her screams silenced. Once it was over, he looked at me. He knew I had been watching. He told me that a woman should be faithful, even if they hadn't slept together in three years.”

He took in a breath, "I hate my father. Even when be was dying, going mad and accusing everyone of things that weren't possible. I hated him with a passion, because he took away the one person who loved me as much as I loved them.”

My heart broke as his voice faltered. He was so strong all the time, but he was still a child. He was just as broken as the rest of us. I didn't think about it I reached for his hands and pressed them between my tiny fingers.

"Bellamy," my voice was low, "I know it doesn't matter, but that's not true. Your father took away your mother, but he didn't take away everyone. Finn is your cousin, he loves you. The guards are faithful to you. And now you have me.”

I smiled slightly as my heart started to pound in my chest. He was staring at me like he was trying to figure out if I was being honest. I squeezed his fingers and then he pulled me in closer. He hugged me against his chest, I felt his heart beating under his shirt. Even thought we had slept together twice now, this was far more intimate than we had gotten.

"I knew there was a reason I couldn't let you go," his voice was soft as he ran his fingers through my hair and down my cheek, "thank you. For understanding.”

I nodded, "you can tell me anything, Bellamy. I am your queen, your wife. I just want to understand you. I want to support you."

He nodded, "and I you.”

I started to pull my hands away, getting ready to tell him more of the story. But he closed his big fingers around mine, holding it gently in his lap. He didn't want me to let go, and despite the reasons why I was here, neither did I. I smiled as I looked at our hands, the tan of his skin against the paleness of mine. 

We might not be perfect, we might have ghosts following us. But together we might just find a way to help each other end the wars inside of us.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke finds out who tried to poison her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FAIR WARNING: this chapter features violence. It is important to the story.
> 
> All your comments are awesome and make me smile!
> 
> Someone asked what time period this is set in. I don't have a time period in mind, it's more of a fantasy story that takes place in it's own world. 
> 
> thanks for reading and if you have suggestions or theories please don't be shy and leave some love! I just love reading your thoughts on my writing and this story =)

Bellamy had been gone for two days, attending business outside the kingdom. After our night in the yard I wasn’t surprised to find I missed him and our time at night. I had started to look forward to sitting with him, to hearing his story as much as telling mine. The castle was quiet without the king. It was intimidating ever since someone had tried to poison me.

Finn took it upon himself to keep me safe. He came to my room every morning along with Raven and checked up on me. He was sweet, but I could tell he had it bad for my hand maid. I smiled when they would bump into each other, their embarrassed cheeks filling with blush. It was just as sickening watching them dance around their feelings as it was cute.

Bellamy made it clear someone was to check my food before it was brought to my room. I fought him over it being Raven, for reasons no one but the two of us knew. She thanked me when he finally agreed the cook would test it in front of Finn. I knew no one else would be foolish enough to try to take me out again. 

The king had been furious, he made it clear if anyone touched me they would face his wrath. I didn't want to know what he would do to them. I'm sure they would be begging for death by the end.

The last two days passed slowly. I missed Bellamy and his deep voice, I missed his warm hand holding mine. I stopped fighting myself, I realized after he saved me this wasn't going to be as easy as I thought it would be. He still wouldn't tell me the truth, but every time I got closer to it I realized this mission was useless. Because this boy King wasn't a monster, he was surviving whatever it was that was haunting him.

It had been hot these past two days. So hot no one left the castle except the guards. Finn complained about the heat, walking around without his shirt on whenever he was forced out into it. Of course he murmured about how we all knew this would happen. He would look at me whenever he said that.

They declared a drought the second day when the kingdom’s water system ran dry. Finn made the decision to start getting water from the outside river since Bellamy wasn't inside the castle. I worried about Bellamy, he had promised he wouldn’t be gone for a long time, but what if something happened? I worried, but I didn't understand what was happening. Whenever someone mentioned the drought or the heat, they usually look at me like it was my fault. 

Maybe this is why I wasn't supposed to live. Maybe my death was supposed to satisfy the kingdom and keep the world in balance. Or maybe I was trying too hard to connect two situations that clearly weren’t related.

It was dark, a noise sounding from across the room. My eyes snapped open, my door slamming shut. I sat up, pulling the blanket up to my chin. I wasn't a scared person, but without Bellamy here I worried someone wouldn't care about his threat. They could flee before he figured out who it was who hurt me.

There was a dark figure standing at the foot of my bed. My heart stopped, “Bellamy?"

"Wrong," the voice was off, it wasn't as deep. It was as angry though. I couldn't see his face but I felt like I had heard him speak before.

I squinted against the darkness but nothing happened. I couldn't see who it was. I pulled my legs up as he figure moved slowly around the bed. They were getting closer to me, "see you're the problem. You're supposed to die. But Bellamy can't see that because he's thinking with the wrong head. So before you cause this kingdom to fall, I'll set things right."

"Murphy," the voice clicked into place just as his hands grabbed me, "don't do this. Please.”

He laughed, it was evil and made my skin crawl, "I promise it'll be quick. Not before I have my own fun with you. Bellamy seems to enjoy his time spent here in this room with you. I want a turn, I want to see what all the fuss is about you.”

I screamed, his hands tight around my neck. The rope burn had healed, but I could feel his fingers causing new bruises, fresh bruises. He cut off my scream, my legs kicking out. He crawled onto the bed and pinned me down. His face was inches away from mine.

"Stop," my voice was barely there. I was struggling against his hold but he was stronger than I ever would be, "please. Bellamy said —”

He cut me off, "screw Bellamy he's going to get us all killed. I'm going to set things right. Not before I get my turn with you.”

I stopped struggling so he would loosen his hold on my arms. He didn't, he pushed his face towards mine. I held my breath, wondering if Bellamy would believe anyone when they told them it wasn't my fault. I swallowed my tears, realizing the monster living here might not have been as obvious as I thought. 

Murphy pushed his mouth against mine and I went still. My body pulled away as his pressed harder against mine. He was grounding me into the mattress. I waited until his lips moved and then bit down hard. He cursed, pulling away as he wiped the blood off his face.

"Bitch," his eyes were hard as I screamed again. He was distracted, I kicked my legs up, hitting his groin as he fell backwards. I didn't waste any time  I rolled over and ran towards my bedroom door. I didn't make it, Murphy cut me off, his eyes looked crazy in the dim light.

"Please," I whispered again, his hand coming to rest on the back of my head, "don't do this.”

"I have to make things right. It wasn't supposed to be this way, the poison was supposed to do the trick," he whispered back, his hand sliding towards my robe.

My eyes went wide as he pushed hard against my back, "it was you. You’re the one who tried to kill me.”

"And I failed. Now I have to try harder," his knee was pressed into the small of my back and I cried out from the pain. He wrapped his one hand around my hair, pulling as his other hand snaked further under my robe. The thin silk couldn't protect me from his dirty hands.

I shivered as he laid his fingers flat on my stomach. He used his knee to push me hard against the wall, my ear listening to the hallway. I heard the footsteps outside the door. I closed my eyes, waiting to for the right moment to make my move. I could get out of this. I could get Murphy off of me.

The door burst open, Finn came in first. He looked surprised when Murphy grabbed me, pulling me in front of his body as a shield. I whimpered, his hand pulling my hair out of my skull. Finn had his sword ready, just as I saw Bellamy come into view.

"Bellamy," my voice broke as he stepped in, my robe barely hanging together. I was wearing a thin night gown underneath, the other guards were trying to pretend they weren't looking.

His eyes were wide, his mouth set in a line. He looked nervous as he stepped towards me. Before he could grab me there was a dagger at my throat, "don't take another step or I'll slice her throat.”

Bellamy's eyes looked into mine and then he looked behind me at Murphy, "just let her go, John. This isn't worth it.”

"It's worth saving my kingdom. I will die knowing my family won't because you let this whore live," his words were right in my ear. Bellamy's hands were in fists as he watch me pull at his arm.

Bellamy held up his hands, laying the sword down on the ground at Murphy's feet. He took in a deep breath, "let her go and take me.”

Finn moved to the right of Bellamy, his sword at the ready. Murphy wasn't watching anyone but Bellamy, because he had his full attention. The dagger’s pressure was getting weaker. I had to wait until the right moment to make my move. Bellamy looked different. It had been two days and he looked different than the man I married.

Murphy's grip slacked, "tell me why I should. Tell my why I should let you be happy with someone when the kingdom is suffering.”

"Because she's my wife," his words were hard, "she doesn't deserve to die.”

Murphy laughed, "neither did my sister, but you didn't even care to get to know her. You didn't go see her or sleep with her. You didn't care, you let me take her to her death sentence.”

Bellamy closed his eyes, "I'm sorry. John I," he shook his head, "this is hard for me too.”

He laughed, "this isn't hard for you, you get to sit back and let us do all the work. By some grace of God you actually feel something for this girl. The same way I cared about my sister. So I'll do what you did.”

He pressed the knife harder against my skin, drawing blood. I didn't waste any time, I kicked his shin right as Finn lunged forward, knocking him in the head with the dagger. He let go of me, I fell forward into Bellamy's arms. I could see the anger in his eyes, he wanted to pound Murphy too.

I put my hand against his cheek, his eyes coming to mine. I smiled, "you're home.”

He laughed, the guards pinning Murphy to the ground behind us. It didn't matter, all I could focus on was my husband, "I wanted to surprise you.”

"Well this was a good surprise," I whispered as Finn called Bellamy's name. 

"What should we do with him?”

Bellamy's gaze never broke from mine, "take him to the prison cell. I'll deal with him later.”

They took him out of my room, my hands holding my robe closed. I closed my eyes, the fear leaving me all at once. Bellamy was still holding me against his chest. I took in a deep breath, opening my eyes and looking up at him. He smiled, his hand brushing over the bruises Murphy had given me.

"I'm fine," I whispered putting my hands against both his cheeks, "I missed you.”

Before he could say anything I raised up on my heels and pressed my lips to his. He didn't hesitate, he pulled me in closer, his lips working with mine. He wrapped his arms around my waist, mine going around his neck. I smiled, this kiss was soft and slow, it was the perfect first kiss.

Bellamy broke away first, his eyes wide and full of light I hadn't seen before, “Clarke."

I shook my head, "don't ruin it, Bellamy. Please.”

He smiled, half his lip raised higher than the other. I smiled back, letting my finger run over his bottom lip, "I heard you scream and my heart stopped. Finn told me not to come, but the thought of you in danger was worse than the thought of my life being put in danger.”

"He said he had to make things right," I whispered, leaning my forehead against his, "it doesn't matter. You got here in time, I'm still in one piece.”

His hands ran down my sides slowly, the thought of keeping my robe closed long gone by now, "I missed you too.”

I laughed as he looked at me, feeling vulnerable in this big room. I laced my fingers through his before he could walk away, "will you stay with me tonight? I just, I don't want to be alone right now.”

I knew he could offer to find Raven, or even find another guard to come stand watch outside my door. But I wanted him, I didn't want to admit it, but I wanted Bellamy to be beside me when I woke up. I waited for his answer, squeezing his fingers gently hoping he could get the message.

"If that's what the queen wants," he smiled, dipping down to kiss me once more, "I need to post Miller outside the door. I don't want another surprise like that happening.”

I nodded, "hurry back," I whispered, his lips barely away from mine before he kissed me again. My body felt light against his, his touch sending shivers down my spine. 

Bellamy waited until I got back under the covers and then left to find Miller. I grabbed a cloth from my nightstand and wiped the blood off my neck. It wasn't more than a scratch, thankfully. I didn't lay down until the doors opened again. I jumped, startled by the noise until I heard Bellamy's voice instructing Miller to stay put and not let anyone inside.

I relaxed once he shut the doors behind him, coming to join me in bed. Sure we had slept together before, but the thought of laying beside him without doing more than touching or talking was more intimate than any night we had previously. My heart was racing as he pulled his shirt off and crawled in beside me. He reached for me before I wondered what would happen next. His warm tan arms wrapped around my waist and held me close.

"Sleep my queen," his lips pressed against my temple, all the fears and doubts chased away, "I promise nothing will get you.”

I closed my eyes, using him as a pillow. I knew he would protect me. But I couldn't stop wondering just why I was the one he chose to save, when there were so many others he could've chosen.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy and Clarke share a nice moment. Because those are few and far between.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy fourth of July!
> 
> This is an added chapter I wrote today for you all. I love your comments and wanted to give you something to hold you over until the next chapter. Plus today is a holiday and I love fireworks. 
> 
> So enjoy the Bellarke moment and please keep commenting and sending the love to this story. I wouldn't enjoy writing it so much without all you beautiful readers =)

The castle was different after Bellamy arrested Murphy. No one talked about me or the fact that I was still alive. The guards looked after me for Bellamy, but they didn’t touch me. They hardly looked at me unless they were having a conversation with me. I had a feeling Murphy wasn’t getting special treatment and they didn’t want to be at the wrong end of Bellamy’s wrath for harming me. Part of me was glad he was getting his punishment, the other part felt bad because he had been doing what I came here to do in the beginning.

Getting justice for his sister.

I pushed those thoughts out of my head as I looked out the window of the castle. I was sitting in the common area, watching the sky darken. Bellamy had called me down, telling me there was something special being put on. Raven was there with Finn, they were sitting together talking. I wondered if she had told him yet, but I wouldn’t ask until we were alone. I wouldn’t put her on the spot like that.

I gave my hand maid a smile as she looked at me. She excused herself from Finn and hugged me tightly, “you’re okay?”

I nodded, even though she had seen me this morning and afternoon she still kept asking me if I was okay. It was nice to have a friend, nice to have someone who truly cared about me. I knew Bellamy cared but it was different with Raven. She was my friend. 

I sat down on the couch running my hands over my knees. The night air was still heavy and thick with heat. But watching out the window I could still see the stars up in the sky. I smiled as they sparkled, reminding me of my village. I used to take Octavia out to look at the stars. After our mom died it was the only way to calm her down. We would look up at the bright lights and she would know our mother was up there watching over us.

I missed my sister. More than I thought I ever would. We fought like crazy, but we were still family. She was my baby sister, she was practically my child. I had taken care of her for so long it was hard to remember what I could do without her following me around. My heart hurt, I could only hope Lincoln was looking out for her. I kept wondering if he was holding her hand or if he was letting her cause trouble the way she always seemed to do.

“So what’s the big surprise?” I asked Finn as Raven sat back down beside him. 

He sighed and then shook his head, “I have no idea. But Bellamy’s pretty excited. I haven't seen him this excited since he got back.”

I smiled, knowing that he was excited for me. Last night had changed things between us. We had been moving in that direction, towards friends and then maybe more. Now we were in the gray area, afraid to touch our feelings but we knew there was no more hostile feelings towards each other. It was nice to know that he was on my side.

I saw Finn reach for Raven’s hand and I smiled again. They were adorable. Raven blushed as her eyes caught mine, “well I hope whatever it is happens soon, because I was looking forward to looking through the big bookshelf in his room.”

Raven laughed, “I’m sure you’ll like his surprise. I hear when he gets like this, they’re the best surprises you ever get.”

I looked around, Bellamy wasn’t here. I felt a little jealous of Raven, her hand sitting in Finn’s as I sat there alone. Whatever this surprise was wouldn’t be the same without Bellamy here with me. I ran my hands over my knees once more, swallowing the lump in my throat. I was becoming homesick. I loved the castle, I loved Raven and I was warming up to the idea of falling for Bellamy. But that didn’t mean I didn’t miss my family. It was nights like this, when we were all together as if we were a family, that the ache opened up.

My father used to gather us around the bonfire on warm nights and tell stories. They weren't the same as my mom’s stories, but he was trying to fill her place in our lives. He would tell ghost stories, the shadows would dance across his face. He would laugh and cackle, he would take on another persona. My father would make us laugh and cry all within one night. Octavia would hide in my side as we forgot about our problems and remembered how wonderful family was.

Miller came into the room, snapping me out of my trance. Bellamy followed behind him. Finn and Raven both stood up, I stayed seated. He nodded his head at his cousin and then smiled at me. I stood up as he came to a stop in front of me, his hands holding my face gently as he kept staring at me. I hadn’t seen him since this morning, when he asked me five times how I was. Then Miller had summoned him for some business and I was left alone to wonder what exactly had happened last night.

I smiled at him, “my king,” I whispered so only he could hear. 

His smile was crooked, it felt out of place. I had only seen him sulk and smirk, never a real smile coming to those lips. It was beautiful, a smile any girl could fall in love with. I couldn’t stop staring, it reached his eyes and lit them up from within. He didn’t look tired or drained. He looked alive and dare I say it — in love.

“My grace,” he kissed my cheek and then I turned my face towards his.

I pressed my lips to his gently, testing out his reaction. He didn’t pull away, he wasn’t afraid to let his castle know we were finally together. I smiled as he pulled his hands off my face and wrapped his arms around my waist. I hugged him close, realizing the time away from him had made me crave his touch, his scent.

Finn cleared his throat and we pulled away. Bellamy laughed, “don’t be jealous Collins,” his voice was deep and harsh, “just because my wife is so beautiful and breathtaking I can’t keep my hands off of her.”

I blushed as Raven raised an eyebrow, watching us together. I shook my head, laughing as I buried my face in his shoulder. This was nice, it was a real moment between us. Ever since I had arrived at the castle I had been moving. I had been thinking of a way to stay alive, I had been trying to outsmart the king or his guards. I never had a moment to stand still and realize I was here in this beautiful place with a handsome husband. I never got to slow down and see how truly amazing it was here.

This was the first moment we shared together where we weren’t trying to find each other’s motives. We weren’t trying to pry into each other’s secrets. We were standing together in the castle that was our home as husband and wife. It wasn’t forced, it was a choice we had made. I wanted to be here in his arms, I wanted to kiss him and tell him how I felt. 

“So,” I cleared my own throat as I pulled my head back up and looked at him. He was still smiling as he laced our fingers together, “what’s this big surprise you have for all of us?”

His eyes lit up again, “oh just wait. They should start soon.”

He waited for me to take my seat again and then took the cushion beside me. He pulled me into his arms, clasping his hands together at my stomach. I smiled as he pressed a kiss behind my ear. I couldn’t stop smiling. Despite what had happened yesterday there was nowhere else I wanted to be. I was still here, I was happy and alive. I never wanted to leave this moment.

I jumped when the first firework started. The noise was loud, it shattered the silence that had settled around us. My hand clasped his tighter, my heart jumping into my throat before I realized there as no real danger. My eyes went wide as the colors bled into the night’s sky. I had heard about these things, I had seen them in dreams. But I had never seen real fireworks. Our village didn’t have the same celebrations as the kingdom. Sometimes we could hear the booms from the show, but we never saw the colors.

“Bellamy,” I whispered his name as we all watched the sky fill up with lights and shapes made by the fire raining down around us, “I’ve never seen fireworks.”

He smiled, kissing my cheek, “I know what happened last night has to be dealt with. I know that we can’t pretend like we aren’t racing against an invisible clock. But for now, I just wanted a moment where you are my wife and I am your husband. I want to be eighteen for a few minutes.”

I smiled as Finn laughed I could feel his eyes watching us together. His voice was full of something I couldn’t quiet put a name on. Admiration, or maybe jealousy, “happy birthday Bell.”

Bellamy pulled me closer and looked at his cousin, “it is a happy birthday,” he said as the fireworks got higher and the world seemed to fade away, “probably the best birthday yet.”

My heart fell when I realized I didn’t even know my husband’s birthday. I ran my fingers over his hands, they still held me close against his chest. It didn’t matter, the little things would come to us. All that mattered were the big moments, the moments when I couldn’t imagine having anyone but him standing beside me. Like this moment, the first time I saw the kingdom’s fireworks everyone raved about. 

The colors melted together, the stars blended in with the show. I laid my head back against his shoulder and I looked into his brown eyes. I didn’t beg for things, I didn’t believe in begging for something you had no control over. But when he looked back at me, I asked him silently to never ever think about letting me go.

The slight nod of his head before he pressed his lips to mine, told me he had no intentions of ever letting me get away.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke has a nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is pretty long, but I think you guys will be happy to see where it's going. The truth is coming soon!

It had been three days since Murphy had attacked me. I hadn't slept in my bedroom since. It was hard to think about going back there, so I started moving my things into the room I was now sharing with my husband. Bellamy didn't seem to mind. Every night I would feel him crawl in beside me. He would pull me into his arms, pressing a kiss against my neck, then my shoulder. I'd smile and listen to his breathing as I fell back asleep in his arms.

Raven wasn't the only one who noticed, all the guards were posted outside his room now. They knew we were just sleeping in the same bed, although I'm sure they thought more was going on. She wasn't the only one who noticed, but she was the only one with enough sass to question me about it. 

I had been a little jumpy after that night. I would walk the halls holding the wall for support, like they would save me if Murphy was there. I couldn't find the strength to stand up taller, to know that he wasn't worth my fears. Raven was the one who suggested we find the garden. She knew I craved the sun, the air. She knew if anything would bring back the old me it was the world outside these walls.

"So spill," her voice was filled with worry and anger as we sat down on the chairs in the middle of the flower bed. Miller was positioned by the door. I could only assume another guard was walking around the grounds, "you've been on edge ever since that night. You can't bottle it up.”

I sighed, closing my eyes and seeing his beady eyes staring at me in the darkness. I felt his dirty hands on my skin and shivered, "I wasn't even that scared when Bellamy's guards took me to the balcony at dawn.”

Raven picked up my hand, "Clarke he didn't get to do what he wanted. Don't let him break you down. You're stronger than this.”

I nodded, "I just keep reliving it. The only time it stops is when Bellamy comes to bed. He makes me feel safe," I laughed at the irony, "the monster who killed all those girls is the only person I find comfort in.”

Raven smiled, "I've never seen me as happy as he is in the mornings when I come to his room. He's smiling, watching you sleep. Usually he's playing with a strand of your hair. Then he sees me and says I should let you sleep, his face forming that mask again.”

I squeezed Ravens hand, "I'm happy. I never thought I would be happy here, but I am.”

"Good. I'm glad you're happy," her face was pale and she took in a deep breath, "ugh do you smell that? It smells like something died and I think I'm going to be sick.”

I squeezed her hand again, "Raven focus on me, not the smell. Breathe in the flowers, breathe through the nauseous feeling.”

She closed her eyes and did as I told her. The color returned to her face. Her hands stopped shaking, "I think you should follow me around for the next seven months.”

I laughed, "you'll be fine," I whispered running my hand up and down her arm, "I promise. Plus you've got me to help you."

There were tears in her eyes, "I'm really glad you're here," her voice broke as she hugged me tightly. I hugged her back, wondering if she would be this emotional through the entire pregnancy, "I don't know if I can do this alone.”

I pushed a long strand of hair behind her ear, "have you told Finn yet?"

She shook her head, "I'm scared," she looked so young as she said the words. My heart broke for her, because I could see how much she wanted to tell him. I could see how much she loved him as she sat there holding my hand.

I swallowed my tears, I would be strong for her. I might not be able to find strength for myself, I would do it for Raven, "I'll come with you.”

She shook her head, "no I should do it on my own. I'm just so scared he'll tell me it's not his. Or worse that he doesn't want it, he'll disown his child. I'm afraid," she stopped, looking down at her lap and away from me.

"Raven what? Tell me.”

She sobbed, her head shaking as she pulled her hands away. She wiped at the tears that had fallen down her cheeks, "I'm afraid he'll tell me this was all a game. That he never loved me, he was just bored. I can't hear that, not right now.”

I smiled slightly, putting my arm around her shoulders, "well first of all he won't tell you that. Second of all you always have me. I won't disown you or reject you. I’ll love that baby as much as any auntie will.”

She smiled, "thanks Clarke. I really am glad you're the queen. But it's even better that you're my friend.”

I squeezed her shoulder, Finn was standing by the door watching us. He was shaking his head, someone was standing beside him. I had a feeling I knew who it was. 

"You should tell him now. The sooner you do, the easier this will all become. He'll take care of you, he'll help you and hold your hand. You won't be alone anymore.”

Her eyes followed mine, Finn smiling at her. She smiled back, her eyes still glistening with tears, "I brought you out here to take your mind off Murphy. Not to rain on your parade.”

I laughed, "well it worked. I'm not worried about him anymore. I'm worried about you.”

"I'm fine," she stood up. I thought she was standing to go towards Finn, but then a shadow crossed over my shoulders. I turned to see Bellamy standing behind me, "I'll let you two talk.”

"Raven," she didn't stop or turn around. She walked right past Finn without stopping, her shoulders shaking from the tears. He went after her, I smiled. 

Bellamy took her place, "it's really hot out here," he sighed and I realized he was right. The drought was still in affect, everyone was conserving water. But it was a nice change from inside the castle.

I didn't say anything as we sat there. Miller was watching us. I smiled, Bellamy's eyes met mine and I leaned towards him. I surprised him by placing a long slow kiss on his lips, his cheeks blushing red as I pulled away.

He raised his eyebrow, "what did I do to deserve that?”

I laughed, "I wanted to make Miller blush.”

It worked, Miller had turned away, his cheeks bright red. Almost as red as Bellamy's. I sighed, sitting back in my chair and looking at my husband. I still wasn't used to that word. I still wasn’t used to looking at him and feeling something other than hatred and anger.  

"I went to see if you were okay, but you weren't in my room," I opened my mouth to tell him he didn't have to keep checking on me, but he didn't stop. He pulled out a piece of paper, "I did however find this. Do you happen to know the artist?”

I laughed, rolling my eyes, "you weren't supposed to see that. It's just a rough sketch.”

"I think it's a masterpiece," his voice was soft and I watched his eyes move over the drawing. I could tell he was seeing himself in a different light. In the light I saw him in, "as is the person who drew it.”

I couldn't help but laugh as his hand came towards mine. He laced our fingers together, placing a kiss on the back of my hand, "you know some day those corny lines aren't going to work.”

He raised his eyebrows, "but that day is not today.”

I shook my head, laughing as he kissed me softly again. This was a new side to Bellamy, one I was sure no one else had seen yet. He was playful, he was happy. He still looked tired, but he was here with me. We were holding hands, kissing in public and acting like teenagers. For the first time in a long time I finally felt like I was seventeen.

Bellamy sighed, the light was fading from the sky, "we should get inside. The bugs come out at night. We’ll get eaten alive out here.”

I stood up, following him towards his room. My feet were bare and made no sound against the tile. He ran his hand down my back, I smiled as he touched the back of my hair. Once we were outside his room Miller stopped following. He turned to face the hallway and Bellamy kissed me. 

He pressed me up against the door as I fumbled for the knob. I pushed it open, the only thing that kept me from falling backwards were his arms. I smiled as he held me tightly against his chest, our mouths saying so much more than our words ever would. Bellamy shut the door, still kissing me as we walked towards the bed.

"Wait," I whispered as he ran his hands down my side, “Bellamy."

He stopped, his eyes dark and he pulled away. I sighed, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pressure you.”

I smiled, "I want to. It's just," I shook my head, "too soon.”

He nodded, balling the sheet up beside him as we settled into the mattress, "I could kill Murphy for what he did to you if I had the chance.”

His knuckles were white from holding the sheet tightly in his fingers, "he doesn't deserve it, but I pity him. He lost his sister, he thinks you should lose me. I felt that way once.”

Bellamy looked at me surprised, like I had just told him all the secrets I had been hiding for the last few days. He sighed, his eyes no longer held the humor they had in the garden, "he doesn't deserve to breathe the air anymore either, but he still is."

"So what are you going to do to him?" My voice was low as I leaned back against he pillows. Bellamy didn't reach out and touch me again. We had found a place between strangers and lovers now. We were still getting to know each other.

He sighed, "well I wanted to rip his arms off for laying a single hand on you. But Finn stopped me," I smiled despite how violent it was. No one ever defended me, "right now he's locked up. Finn thinks we should interrogate him. He's not working alone. I want to banish him.”

I wondered what I would do if the situation was reversed. I wanted him gone, but I wouldn't say I wanted him dead. I took in a breath and nodded slowly.

"I know it goes without saying, but thank you for defending me. I uh, I've always been the one doing the defending. I forget what it's like to have someone care that much.”

Bellamy smiled slightly, "you are my wife, I will always defend you. I promised you the day we married.”

I didn't remember our vows, I only remembered fear, "still I'm glad you were here. I thought of getting away and I realized that you were the person I wanted to run to. I wanted you to tell me it would be okay.”

Bellamy pulled me towards him, hugging me into his side. I felt his lips press lightly against my cheek, "it will be okay. I can't promise it'll be easy, but it will be okay.”

I wiped away a tear before he could see it fall. Then I sat up, thinking of the stories we had shared with each other. I let out a slow breath, thinking back to our first night together. We had been strangers, I had been ready to kill him. Now here we were, not quiet strangers, not comfortable as husband and wife.

I pushed my hair out of my face, watching as Bellamy got caught up in his own mind. His eyes were soft, like he was remembering a good day. I wanted to ask him what day it was, what memory could make him smile like that. But then another question popped into my head.

One he had asked me almost seven days ago now.

"Do you think you want kids someday?" My question surprised me. Bellamy stopped what he was doing, raising an eyebrow at me.

He coughed, "I uh. I'm not sure," he looked away, his hands in his lap as we sat in his bed. I refused to go back to my room after Murphy's attack, "I mean I never thought I'd finally have a wife, children seem impossible.”

I picked up his hand, we were more open with each other ever since we kissed, "I think a little boy with your curls would be adorable.”

"And your blue eyes," he whispered, squeezing my hand gently, "maybe we can have a happy ending.”

I yawned and Bellamy kissed my cheek, “I’m sorry, I promise you aren’t boring me.”

He laughed, running his thumb across my chin, “you look tired, Clarke. Get some sleep, I promise Murphy isn’t going to get to you ever again.”

I nodded my head as he pulled me into his arms. I laid my head on the pillow, feeling safer as his sigh hit my shoulder. I smiled as I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

 

I was pretty sure I was dreaming. I was laying in Bellamy’s bed, his arms around me again. It was exactly the scene we had fallen asleep in. Something was different, the room was darker. The shadows were blue, the air was stale. Bellamy was asleep beside me, his lips twitching as he spoke to the empty room. I felt off, my body wasn’t mine and yet I was there watching us sleep together.

The room was quiet, eerily quiet like the night Murphy snuck in. I could feel everything, I could feel the tension, I could taste the air around me. It was too real to be just a dream; too hazy to be reality. My mouth was dry as the shadows moved, my hands clenched the blanket at my shoulders. I couldn’t move, I was stuck on the bed, watching as the dark corners came towards me.

“Clarke, Clarke,” they started taunting me. The voice was high, the same as Murphy’s. The shadows chanted my name, letting out an evil laugh as I shook and closed my eyes, begging for this to be over. Whatever was happening right now was too real. It was more than a nightmare, it was black magic.

The shadows called my name over and over again. I reached out for Bellamy, he had been asleep beside me only a few seconds ago. But his side of the bed was empty. The blanket was folded up against the pillow, as if he hadn’t been there at all. My eyes filled with tears once I realized I was alone. Something fell off the shelf to my left, my eyes catching the curtains blowing in front of the window.

We didn’t leave it open before we went to sleep. It was too hot outside, there was no wind. I knew this was a dream, I pinched myself but it hurt. I shook my head, this wasn’t real and yet it felt real. I closed my eyes, “I’m not afraid. I’m not afraid.”

I channeled my inner Octavia, trying to be stronger than I felt in that moment. I shivered in the cold that followed the curtains, my mind screaming at me to run out of the room. I still couldn’t move, I was frozen in place. My legs wouldn’t listen to my brain, my body was fixed on the mattress.

“You though you were special, didn’t you?” his voice was beside me. I looked towards my left, his face hidden by the shadows. All I could see was the deep brown of his eyes, his body hidden by the dark. Before I could ask what was happening, he pinned me down on the mattress, his body pressed into mine.

I shook my head, “Bellamy stop, please,” his hold was hard and painful. I wanted to scream, but his eyes alone were enough to stop me. This wasn’t the man I married, this wasn’t the husband I had grown to care for. This was a monster, the shadows were feeding off his negative energy. The monsters were fueling whatever delusion I was suddenly under.

He wore an evil smile, “you aren’t special. What’s done is done, we must strode the balance.”

I struggled against him, trying to fight him off of me. He was stronger than me, he wouldn’t let go of my hands. I started to scream, the sound was cut off before it reached my ears. An invisible hand squeezed my neck, my throat closed off from making any sound, from breathing in any air. Bellamy kept staring at me as he choked me. My eyes went wide as I coughed out through the pain. His nails dug into the palm of my hands. I couldn’t make a sound, I couldn’t cry out for help.

This wasn’t a dream, it was a nightmare.

My legs thrashed out underneath the covers, visions of the dawn came back to me. I was drowning again, my heart pounding as I realized I would die by the hands of the monster I thought had been tamed.

I heard my name off in the distance. I kicked my leg out again, hitting something hard and body like beside me. My eyes went towards my right, the bed was still empty. There were spots flashing in front of my eyes. Bellamy’s body was still on top of mine, and yet his hands weren’t around my throat. I gasped for air, my hands batting at my own neck. There was nothing pressing against my skin, I still couldn’t breathe.

“Clarke, wake up,” his deep voice was soft, filled with exhaustion. It sounded nothing like nightmare Bellamy and the boy king I had started to care for. 

My eyes flew open, the air rushing in as his arms found me. I coughed, gasping for the cool air that filled my lungs, the spots fading as the king held me against his chest, “shh,” he ran his hand down the back of my head, “it was just a dream. You’re okay. You’re safe.”

I shook my head, “I was drowning, Bellamy,” my hands reached for my neck once more. There was nothing there to indicate what had happened, but I could still feel the invisible hands cutting off my air, “it felt so real.”

He sighed, his eyes dark as my breathing returned to normal. I tried to settled my heart, holding onto his warm arms for support. Bellamy was quiet as he watched me. It was like he was trying to process what had happened. I had been asleep, I had been attacked in my sleep. It was real, I could tell by the way he was staring at me. He was trying to figure out a way to play off the nightmare. But there were hot marks on my neck, this wasn’t a simple nightmare. There was something in the castle I had no idea about.

Bellamy pressed the palm of his hands against his eyes, then shook his head. He let out a long groan, cursing under his breath as he looked back at me, “Clarke I’m so sorry.”

I wasn’t sure why was apologizing, I knew it wasn’t him. It was a dream and yet it wasn’t, but he would never hurt me. I know he would never lay a hand on me. After what he told me about his mom and dad, I knew Bellamy was one of the good ones. I shook my head, “it’s okay. I’m fine.”

“You can stop telling me you’re fine,” his jaw was tense, his shoulders sagging, “you shouldn’t have to live this way. Constantly fearing for your life, under the attack of real and invisible demons. I shouldn’t have let you stay. I should’ve sent you away before this happened. First Murphy and now this,” his voice broken, tears filling his eyes, “I care about you too much to let them do this.”

I had been asking for the truth since we were married. I told him stories, I told him my story and he had told me his. I could see in his eyes that I was now going to get the one story he never wanted to share with me. The one story I had been asking for that would solve all my problems.

I could tell by the look on his face that this wouldn’t solve our problems, it would only cause more.

“Bellamy,” I pressed my hand against his forearm.

“I didn’t want you to become a pawn in this game. But I can’t protect you unless you know everything.”

He sighed once more, fighting himself, “I told you I wouldn’t ask anymore. I respect you and this castle. I won’t make you tell me something that isn’t mine to know.”

He brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it gently, “I hope you still feel the same way after the conversation we’re about to have,” he let my hand fall back down onto the bed and then looked into my eyes. 

“Nothing you tell me will change what we’ve started. I promise,” I laced my fingers through his, showing him that we were stronger than whatever this was. 

He sighed, ignoring my affection, “you’ve been asking since you married me, so I guess I can’t hide anymore. It’s time to finally tell you the truth.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy tells Clarke the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HERE IT IS!!! the truth will set you free right? maybe. just maybe. Don't worry now that we know the truth the story isn't over yet! I hope you like this chapter and I hope you finally understand Bellamy a little better!
> 
> Thanks for all the comments and love =)

Bellamy made sure I was calmed down then he pulled away. I felt cold without his arms around me, the pressure still tingling on my neck. I pulled at the blankets, watching him as he gathered himself up back. I could see the mask of the stranger I had first met fall back into place. He was pulling away, just when I thought we were finally moving to something more than friends, something less than strangers.

I hurt to realize he closed off so easily. I just wanted him to know that I was his wife no matter what. Even if this had been more than a dream. It had been so close to real I could hardly handle it. The worst part was it was a memory of that dawn a few weeks ago. When I had almost met my death.

Dying once was hard, but constantly being attacked was worse. I closed my eyes and tried to put on a brave face. I wanted Bellamy to tell me the truth. He said he would. It looked like he was closing down on me now. 

I stayed quiet as he gathered his thoughts. I took in a deep breath as I watched him twist his ring around.

It was a gold band with two swords interlocked together. I wasn't sure I had seen it before, "have you always worn a ring?"

He nodded, relieved at the change of subject, "I have. It's my wedding band," he swallowed, "I actually have something for you.”

Despite everything that had just happened I laughed, "really? A present?" I looked at him through my eye lashes and blinked, "for me?”

Bellamy's smile was short lived and small. But it was still his smile that I was starting to fall for. I watched him reach towards the drawer beside the bed and he pulled something out. He sat up straighter and then cleared his throat.

"I uh. I thought of you when I found her ring. It belonged to my mother and my grandmother before that," Bellamy handed me a vintage diamond ring. I gasped at the beautiful piece of jewelry. It was breathtaking, but it meant so much more that he was giving me a piece of his past.

A tear slipped down my cheek, "Bellamy it's beautiful. Thank you," I held out my left hand and he slipped it onto my ring finger. It fit perfectly, the diamond catching the light. 

"You should have a wedding ring too," he picked my hand up and turned it over. On the other side of the band there was the same emblem. Two swords crossed over each other, "we share the same emblem of he kingdom.”

I couldn't stop smiling. This was the sweetest gesture he had given me since arriving at the castle. I leaned up and kissed him. He smiled, but it was fast. It disappeared as quickly as it had come, "Bell what's wrong?”

He shook his head, "I need to tell you the truth. But once you find out you aren't safe. I just," he looked up at me with tears in his eyes, "I can't lose you. Not after I only found you.”

I reached out and put my hand against his cheek. I waited until he was looking at me again. I kissed his lips softly, "I don't care about the danger. I care about you. I love you," he smiled as I said the words slowly, "I am your wife, I will stand beside you no matter what.”

He was quiet as we sat beside each other. The nightmare from last night was long gone. I could tell he was getting ready for me to run. He was afraid if I knew the truth I would take Octavia up on her offer. I wasn't going to leave him, no matter what I would stay with him.

He pulled away, leaning against the backboard as he sighed. He closed his eyes, the silence was making this worse. I grabbed his hand and he opened his eyes.

Bellamy looked at me, spinning his wedding ring around on his finger. I smiled down at mine, the one he had just given me, "it started with my father. He died when I was fifteen, he never prepared me to lead this kingdom. He was already mad by the time I was of age to start learning to become the next king.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat as he went on, "I became the king with the help of Finn and my uncle. He died when I turned seventeen. He was more my father for three years than my own. Anyways I met Roma when I was sixteen and we married. We were happy, I thought I was in love. But the pressures of being a king were more than I expected and I didn't spend a lot of time with her.”

I hadn't realized he had an actual wife before I came along. He squeezed my fingers gently as he looked away, "she grew distant. I'd come to bed and she'd shy away from me. One night she decided to give us a try again and we were together. A few months later she was pregnant. She was so excited, more excited than I was. I wasn't ready to be king let alone a father.”

He wiped away a tear, pausing his story. I ran my finger over the back of his hand and he looked down at our fingers tangled together. I moved in closer, but I felt him go tense as my leg touched his.

"She lost the baby three months into the pregnancy. The doctors said she was too stressed, she wasn't happy and her body couldn't support both of them. She got even more distant after that. She was depressed and I never tried to talk to her. She never tried to talk to me either. One morning I went to the balcony where Raven told me she was, and I found her hanging there."

"Bellamy," my voice broke as we sat there, "I'm sorry.”

He shook his head, “I really did love her. No one believes me when I tell them that, but I was young and new to everything about this life. Taking a wife in the beginning wasn’t the best choice any of the advisors around me made,” he cleared his throat, “I went to visit her father a few days after it happened. I felt like he deserved to know that his daughter had been unhappy with me. He was more than upset, he hated me. I could see it in his eyes, I had taken away his only child. So he grabbed my sword, sliced open his wrist and chanted a few words I didn't understand.”

I gasped, thinking about to the shadows that had held me hostage, choking me in my sleep. Murphy had tried to poison me with nothing at all. Was it possible there was magic within the kingdom? I looked at Bellamy, he looked so tired.

"He wanted my kingdom to hate me as much as he did. So he damned my name, I had to kill one hundred innocent girls, daughters of my people, in order to being justice to Roma's name. They had to die by the rope at dawn on the balcony, the same way she did. I wasn't allowed to be happy, not when he lost his little girl," he cleared his throat, "before I could beg him for a cure or a loophole he stuck my sword through his chest and he was gone.”

I let out a slow breath, my heart was heavy. It made total sense and yet no sense at all. Bellamy was cursed, he was forced to execute his brides. He wasn't the monster, Roma's father was. I closed my eyes, thinking of Harper and all the others who would never learn the truth behind their deaths. 

"You saved me. I'm not even close to one hundred," I whispered, my finger reaching out and running over the circle under his eyes, "I'm supposed to die to keep the balance.”

He shook his head, "I won't sacrifice you. I can’t. It’s selfish and I know it, but now that I have you, I know you, I don’t want to let you go. I will find a way out of the curse or a way to break it before I let them take you away. I need you, just as much as the kingdom does.”

I smiled slightly feeling torn between wanting him and wanting what's best for the kingdom, "that's why you can’t sleep.”

Bellamy nodded, his jaw tense, "the curse was put on my family a long time ago. Roma's father just altered it. My father went mad because of the curse. This castle is programmed to drive every king mad before their fiftieth birthday. I knew that when I was born, but her father made sure I wouldn’t go mad. He wanted me to suffer every single day. Insanity is release compared to the pain I feel.”

I forced him to look at me, "we will find a way out of it. You and me," I pressed my lips against his hands and tried to believe with all my heart and soul we would find our way out, "I love you. There has to be something that breaks the evil he put over you.”

"Finn and I have exhausted every avenue we know of. After I met you I started searching harder. I knew I couldn't just let you walk to your death at dawn. But every wizard and sorcerer we've found hiding in the shadows tells me this curse is tangled up in too many lives.”

I took his face between my hands and kissed him softly. His brown eyes were full of sadness, he was exhausted, "we will find a way to break this curse. You and me, we will I promise.”

I closed his eyes, "God I hope you're right.”

I ran my thumb below his eye, “that’s why you never tried to get to know the brides. The curse forbids you a moment of peace. No sleep, no happiness. Nothing.”

He nodded, "if I sleep I dream about them. The nameless faceless girls I've killed. I dream of Roma and the child we never got to have. I dream of you," his voice was soft and broken, "of losing you. So I don't sleep, it's easier to avoid the demons that way.”

I thought back to my village, to the whispers of magic I had once heard. Octavia had paid more attention, Lincoln had always been interested in that kind of thing. I wondered if he would know. He knew everything about history and the supernatural most people shied away from. If I could get word to him maybe he could help us.

Lincoln wouldn't question, he wouldn't pry. He would listen and he would promise to stay quiet. Everyone trusted Lincoln because he was that kind of person. I was happy my sister had found someone like him. I knew if there was anyone who could help us it would be him.

I would find a way to get to him tomorrow. Maybe Bellamy would agree and we would ride out to our village together. Maybe he would meet my family and they would see I was happy. I wanted my father to know I was happy. I wasn't in danger anymore because we had fallen for each other. Maybe they would be able to forgive him for Harper and everyone else, the way I had forgiven him.

I ran my hand across his chest, pulling him in closer to me. He didn't resist, he wrapped his arms around my waist and I kissed his shoulder. I felt him shiver under my touch, making me smile once again. The mask was slipping, the man who saved me was falling back into place beside me. I took in a deep breath, pressing my lips against his neck. I wasn’t ready to admit just how deeply I felt, but I knew I was close to falling in love with him.

"I know it's useless to tell you to sleep, but maybe you should try. You have to be exhausted," he sighed as I felt my own eyes get heavy. The dream had scared me, but now that Bellamy was here with me I was fine. 

I was safe in his arms, safer than I had ever been. 

He smiled, "I'm fine. You sleep, Clarke. I'm just glad you're still here in this castle, in this bed, with me.”

“A tired king can’t run a kingdom,” I whispered, a yawn falling through my parted lips. He shook his head, running his fingers through my blonde curls. He held onto me tightly, as if he could keep me safe by pulling me into his chest and making us into one person. I wasn’t fragile, but I liked being able to rely on someone else for a change. I liked having Bellamy there to fall back on.

He pressed a kiss to my forehead as I closed my eyes. I couldn't stop thinking about Lincoln and my family. I had a new plan, one that involved reaching out to my family and bringing them to the one place I never thought I would. It terrified me to let them back into this world, but I had to save him. My family would finally get to see the castle, or in a twist of fate, my new home.

Bellamy was my family now. Even if I was battling invisible forces or a curse that had been set years ago, I wouldn’t let him go without a fight.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke gets a surprised visitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so glad you guys finally know the truth about the castle. They're going to try hard to break the curse and trust me it won't be easy. Thanks for the comments =)

Bellamy and I started to search for a loop hole, a white flag, anything that would stop the curse. The drought got worse as our search got harder. Bellamy left the kingdom for hours trying to find anyone that could possibly help. He even contemplated seeking out Roma’s distant family. Finn sought out wizards who were wanted for black magic, I sent a letter to Lincoln. I didn't tell Bellamy, I did it hoping somehow someone would be able to help us.

Two weeks passed after I learned the truth. The wells ran dry, the king brought water in from an outside source every day. Finn and Bellamy worked to construct a system to pump it from the river. The heat was getting worse, the sun was burning the ground. Crops wouldn’t grow, people were starving. I felt like a failure waiting for something to break.

I had learned the truth but at what cost? I couldn’t help my people, my family, without finding out a way to break the curse of the castle. I didn’t have magic, no one in the kingdom seemed to. We were all searching for an answer we didn’t know actually existed. All I knew was that I wanted to live. But I would sacrifice myself for Bellamy and the rest of his people if that’s what it took.

Bellamy wouldn’t talk about that option. Whenever we were sitting in bed I would bring up the option we had and he would go silent, he would shut down on me. He wouldn’t think about it, he wouldn’t let me go. He promised we would find a way to break the curse without ending my life or any other women in the kingdom. He really was a different man from the stoic figure I had married.

I started to look through Roma's old belongings, maybe she had been into magic and vengeance like her father. All I found were old journals of her writings, talking about how much she hated the kingdom, how she loved Bellamy and hated him all the same. There was an entry about the miscarriage, it brought me to tears. I felt pity for this woman and hatred. Because of her death we all had to suffer.

I stopped looking at her things after reading the journal.

I was looking at Bellamy's book case when I stumbled upon the old worn leather journal. It looked so different from all the other books, I pulled it out. I thought it might be useful, until I opened the first page and saw the writing. It was a letter, addressed to Roma. My eyes went wide as the script curled around the lines. I sat down on the big chair that was in the corner, my heart pounding as I started to read.

 

_Roma,_

_I don’t know the right words to express how truly sorry I am to lose you. I loved you, once upon a time I thought you loved me too. We were too young to start out this life together, I was too young to become a king and a husband in the same year. I’ll admit this to you now, it was too much for me to bare._

_You would’ve been a beautiful mother, a beautiful wife to the man who truly deserved you. I don’t know how to change the course of what happened, but I will change. I won’t let someone else grow distant because of the monster I have become as king._

 

I stopped reading, the words blending together. This letter was intended for Roma and her family. Bellamy changes the wording halfway through and talks about the beautiful woman Roma was, the daughter he took away from her family. A tear slipped down my cheek as I turned the page, another letter for another family. 

This journal was filled with a dozen letters, each addressed to the family of the brides he took from them. I turned the pages, reading half of some and none of others. Then I stopped as I found the name I was looking for. My hands were shaking as I held the book tightly, waiting for the words to change, for them to disappear completely.

I wasn’t supposed to be reading this, I wasn’t supposed to know this existed. But it gave me another side of Bellamy I thought had been lost. He was here, in this book, finally showing me he did care about the girls he had to murder. I took in a deep breath, running my finger over her name. Her letter was short, but I knew I couldn’t get past it without reading the entire thing.

I let out a shaking breath and my eyes focused on the words.

 

_Harper_

_I am so sorry for taking away your beautiful daughter. She was a light this kingdom needed, a spirit that should not have been taken away. She was as beautiful inside as she was outside. I have never met a girl as beautiful, as caring and sincere as Harper Griffin. It pains me to know I am the reason she no longer walks the earth we share._

_Harper was brave, she took my hand and never faltered. She knew her fate, they all seem to know these days, and she still smiled at me. She was happy, throughout the ceremony she seemed to take the words to heart. She held my hand, she smiled at me, and then when the minister said the words, she bowed her head and said a silent prayer for the family she was leaving behind._

_No one else had ever asked for mercy on the souls of their loved ones. Harper was truly a special person._

_I wish I hadn’t taken her away from you. I wish I could change the way things had happened. I wish I could’ve sent her back. But I cannot change the actions of the past._

_Just know that she went to her death with her head held high, her chin set in determination. She never let her tears fall, she held her hands together and asked my guard to tell her family she would miss them. She asked you not to cry for her, but to know that she has gotten peace, and someday you all will too._

 

The letter wasn’t signed, I wasn’t even sure it was completely finished. But it was there, in black and white, the words I never thought I wanted to know. Bellamy took away Harper’s life for his own. The curse would keep the kingdom safe as long as each bride died by morning. I closed my eyes, fighting off the fresh set of tears. He wasn’t a monster, he was keeping everyone alive the only way he knew how.

Even if he didn’t kill the girls the kingdom would suffer. They would die by starvation, dehydration. There was no alternate to this curse, it was either die by the hands of the king and have the entire kingdom hating him, or die by the curse and the lack of power from the kingdom. It was a double edge sword no king should have to bare.

I flipped the page, my name was at the top. 

 

_Clarke_

_I never once went to visit with the girls I marry. It is too hard to bare the thought of getting to know them when I will only lose them in the morning. There was something inside those blue eyes that drew me to her room that night. Something that begged for me to know more. I went without the consent of the guards, my own cousin told me I was being stupid. I went to her nonetheless and found myself mesmerized by more than just her beauty._

_Your daughter is a spirit this kingdom needs. She weaves the stories inside and out, her words holding my attention, my desire for far longer than I ever thought necessary. Had things been different I could’ve fallen for her. I could’ve been happy with her. Looking at Clarke is like breathing in a breath of fresh air —_

 

The letter cut off, tears filled my eyes. He must have written this before they took me. He must have stopped and went to save me. He didn’t finish the letter, the last word was there staring at me. My heart stopped, it hurt to realize he had saved me but not the others. Why? Because he thought he could love me and not the other girls? He didn’t even think to talk to them, he left them alone, waiting to die.

He came to my room because he liked me. I told him a story to bide my time. It is not the start of a perfect romance, fairytales often start differently. But maybe this is a story we will tell our grandchildren one day. How we fell in love even though we were supposed to fall apart.

I shut the book, running my hand over the leather cover. He wouldn’t need this journal anymore. Not if we could find a way to break the curse. We could have the happy ending he keeps talking about. I took in a deep breath, staring at the empty room around me. 

I heard the scream before I registered what it was. Then there were boots running down the hallway, towards the owner of the noise. I jumped up, throwing the book back on the shelf. I knew that scream, my heart raced as I ran out of the room and into the hallway. 

My feet were faster than ever as I ran down the dark hallway towards the guards. I heard them talking, I heard someone trying to fight them off. I came to a stop just outside my bedroom door. My heart jumped into my throat when I saw my baby sister in the hands of Bellamy’s guards. I swallowed the lump, trying not to let them see me upset. Her eyes were staring at Miller, she was angry. 

This was a fight she couldn’t win, but that didn’t mean she would back down. She had always been the one to fight until the very end, even if she was losing. My sister was tough, something she didn’t get from me. I took in a deep breath and took a second to collect myself before I walked towards them. 

I stepped forward, into the light as the guards started to walk in my direction. Octavia’s eyes went wide when she saw me.

“Miller,” my voice was even, it didn’t shake like I thought it would, “let her go.”

He shook his head, always obeying orders, “with all due respect my grace, all intruders are to face the king to receive their punishment.”

I looked at my sister, her brown eyes met mine. I could see she was scared, I could practically hear her thoughts chanting _I’m not afraid, I’m not afraid_ the way we used to when we were younger.

“She belongs to me,” I said before I realized what I was saying. I was admitting to aiding a criminal in the castle. Miller looked surprised as Bellamy appeared beside me, “please let her go.”

Miller looked to the king, “all trespassers must face death,” Bellamy’s deep voice was hard, “what makes her any different?”

Octavia struggled against the guards, her dark features so different from mine. Her long hair was braided away from her face. It reminded me of Lincoln’s sisters, they would braid their hair when they were ready for battle. Her skin was darker, her eyes were harder. Bellamy watched her try and reach the dagger at her waist, Miller’s hands were holding her tightly. 

I swallowed my fear, “she’s my sister.”

Bellamy looked surprised. I had told him stories of my sister, how I cared for her after our mother died. I had mentioned her without a second thought when we were honest with each other. I could see he realized how important she was to me. I looked back at him, waiting for him to give his next move.

He nodded to Miller, telling him to let her go. He released her arms and I let out a sigh of relief. I couldn’t stop the smile that came to my face as she lunged towards me. Her arms came around me and she hugged me only the way a little sister could; hard and long. She gathered up the broken pieces and tried to put them back together. This was the hug I had been missing, she was the person I needed.

“Clarke,” her voice broke in my ear, “you’re still alive. I can’t believe it.”

I pulled back hitting her arm, “what were you thinking sneaking in here? They could’ve killed you on the spot, no questions asked! Does dad know you’re here?”

She shook her head, “I didn’t tell anyone, not even Lincoln.”

I rolled my eyes, typical Octavia, always thinking with her heart and not her brain. I shook my head, hugging her once more as I realized just how happy I was to see her. She looked just as relieved to see me in once piece as I was to see her. Bellamy cleared his throat behind me, Octavia’s eyes snapped open.

She stepped in between me and the king, her hand grabbing the dagger she had so desperately wanted earlier. She held it towards him, her other arm in front of my waist. I grabbed her shoulder, trying to push her away. The guards went towards Bellamy, but I saw him shake his head. He knew he wasn’t in any real danger.

“Octavia stop,” I said as she stood staring at my husband. Her eyes were dark, her mouth was set in a thin line. She was trying to see how hard it would be to take him out. I had been in her place once before, I had felt the same way.

She huffed, “this is the man who was going to murder you, Clarke. He murdered —” I squeezed her shoulder before she could say Harper’s name. I shook my head, Bellamy watching us there together. She held the dagger tightly as she looked back at me. 

“No, he’s not,” I said quietly as I stood up straighter and walked around my sister. She kept the dagger pointed at Bellamy, I stepped in between them. Now it was pointed at me. I took his hand in mine so he wouldn’t push me behind him like I knew he wanted to, “king Bellamy meet my stubborn and impulsive sister Octavia.”

My blue eyes met hers, “O, meet my husband, Bellamy Blake.”

Her face was full of shock as she slowly lowered the weapon. She watched us together, his hand holding mine gently. There was no force in his grip at all. She saw me take his hand, she knew I wasn’t under his control. Slowly she reached out and took the hand he offered, shaking it gently. I smiled, feeling his fingers squeeze mine gently.

He had been waiting to meet my family. I guess now was as good a time as any.

“It’s so nice to put a face with the name. Your sister has told me a lot about you,” he smiled as Octavia winced. I could tell she wasn’t taken by his charm. We were alike that way, I hadn’t been fooled at first either, “you’re beautiful, just as your sister said.”

She blushed, surprising me, “thank you,” she stuttered. She dropped his hand fast and then looked at me, “do you think I could speak to you, alone?”

Bellamy looked to me, waiting for my answer. We were supposed to go out of the castle tonight. He had promised me we would sneak out without the guards and try to someone who could help us. I convinced him that I could help in the quest and I thought I could find someone who would trust me. They might not have been able to trust the king, but I wasn’t as stoic as he was.

I nodded at my sister, “let’s go to my room,” the words alone sent a shiver down my spine. I had refused to set foot in there since the Murphy thing happened. I had moved into my husband’s room. Preferring to fall asleep beside him, after learning more about each other. Still I knew we needed a moment to have our reunion.

Octavia walked ahead of me after I pointed in the door. We weren’t far and she was ready to get away from their prying eyes, I could tell. I took in a breath, Bellamy grabbed my hand before I could follow my sister, “everything okay?”

I looked at him, wondering if everything was okay. After a moment I let out the breath I had been holding, “you promise to keep us safe right?” he nodded his head, bringing my hand to his lips, “then everything is fine.”

His eyes sparkled as he smiled, letting me go, “good. Because it looks like I have a family dinner to put together.”

My heart stopped as he stood there watching me walk towards my bedroom door. I knew what Octavia wanted to talk about, I knew why she asked to be alone. Which meant I wasn’t sure a dinner with the two of them would go over smoothly. She had already tried to kill him once, I wasn’t sure I would be able to stop her if she tried a second time.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sisters are reunited, a marriage is under strain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this chapter was so much fun to write because I wanted to make Octavia use a fork as a weapon...
> 
> Keep the comments coming! I can't wait to post the next chapter. =)

I closed my bedroom door behind me, Octavia was too impressed with the big room to notice that my hands were shaking. I crossed my arms over my chest, watching as she spun around staring at the big open space. Our house back in the village could’ve fit in this room alone. I smiled, she looked like the little girl she had once been.

She was always so full of life, so happy even with the little my father could give us. She laughed at the stupid jokes I made, she held my hand whenever I was upset. I never realized how hard it would be to go through life without her beside me. I loved her, but I never wanted her to come here. I wasn’t ready for her to see the life I had stumbled into, the life I wasn’t ready to leave just yet. 

In the beginning I just didn't want her to know my plan. Now my plan had changed and I knew she would hate me when she realized how different I was. I didn’t want her to get tangled up in the web that was the curse, the castle and the king. I didn’t know how to explain to her the feelings I suddenly had, or tell her that I wasn’t going to bring justice to Harper’s name. I knew she wouldn’t understand why I no longer wanted the king dead.

She was too loyal, too headstrong to listen when I told her that Bellamy wasn't the monster we all thought he was. He was caring and kind, he was sweet and charming. He was my husband and I was in love with him. 

I crossed my arms over my chest, the idea of her dying by the hands of the guard came flashing back to me, "Octavia what the hell are you doing here? How did you get here? What were you thinking? I swear someday you’re going to get yourself killed.”

My sister narrowed her eyes at me, "I intercepted your letter to Lincoln. I thought you needed help and I wanted to see you," tears filled her eyes, "I missed you Clarke.”

I sighed and fought off my own tears. I wrapped her up in a hug, feeling my heart pull back together as we stood there together. I smiled through my tears and shook my head, pulling away to look at the woman who now stood in front of me. It felt like years had passed since I had seen her last, when in reality it had only been a month. She looked so different, she looked so much older.

"How's dad?" I asked wiping a tear off her cheek.

She sighed, "a mess without you. We thought you were dead and then people came through telling us the king finally spared a wife. We couldn't believe that you did it. You found a way to outsmart the king,” she laughed, “dad was so proud.”

I nodded, "yeah. I can't believe it either.”

She looked around my room, "so what's the plan now? I mean surely you still plan on taking him down. I want in,” she set her chin up, “I want to help.”

I bit my lip, looking down at my hands, "the plan has changed a little," I said quietly. 

Her eyes went wide, "Clarke," she drew out my name, "don't tell me you like him now. It's been a month since you married the monster. A month since he took away our cousin, your best friend!”

My eyes found hers, "it's complicated, Octavia. He's not a monster," I stepped forward and she pushed my hand away.

"You aren't my sister. He brainwashed you, convinced you to spare his life, something!" Her voice was getting louder, "Harper was your best friend. She was my second big sister. Think of Wells," her voice broke as she screamed at me.

I looked away from her, "it's not that easy Octavia. I've been here, I've learned the truth.”

"You've slept with him," she spit the words out hard.

I balled my hands into fists, "Octavia you don't know what's happened here. You don't know anything so don't go throwing around accusations. I've made up my mind I will not go after him and neither will you.”

"I won't pretend to like him. I won't pretend to be his subject because you ask me to," she was angry at me. I could see it in her eyes.

I sighed, "don't be a brat Octavia. Please.”

"You aren't my mother, you never were so don't pretend to be. You're under his spell, you aren't thinking straight. I came to help my sister, not the king’s wife.”

I shrugged, stepping forward, towards my sister. She was reaching for me. She slapped me across the face. I gasped as the door opened and Miller stepped in. I pushed down the tears that came with her anger, she always had a temper. Especially when things didn’t go her way. I closed my eyes and then let out a slow breath.

When I opened them Miller was staring at me. Octavia looked angrier than before as I smiled at her, "maybe you'll find you like the king’s wife," I spoke softly as the guard took a step in front of me.

"I doubt it," her words were cold, she rolled her eyes, "I see you don't even defend yourself anymore.”

Miller watched Octavia as she started to pace. I put my hand on his arm, "it's okay. I can handle her, she won't hurt me.”

“Bellamy asked me to make sure everything was okay,” he said, “we heard you two yelling. We uh, he thought maybe you two were having problems.”

I squeezed his arm gently, “it’s okay Miller, thank you. Please tell my husband we will be out in a few minutes.”

Octavia rolled her eyes at me as the guard left us alone again. "I can't believe you call him your husband," Octavia muttered as I changed into a different dress. I knew dinner was important to him, so I wanted to wear something nice. I would make sure things went smoothly, even if I had to sit on my sister to get her to behave while we were in the same room as Bellamy. 

I stared at my sister, "did you really think I would go with you? Octavia you read my letter, I was begging Lincoln for help. I wouldn't be begging for his knowledge on magic if I didn't care about the kingdom or the king.”

She rolled her eyes, her shoulder set, "I thought you were speaking in code. I thought you needed my help, I didn't read what you wrote, I read between the lines. I thought maybe you wanted to come home.”

I grabbed her hand the anger I felt before was gone. I wanted her to understand now, "this is my home now, O. I like it here, believe it or not. I like the king and he seems to like me too.”

She snorted, "until someone better comes along. The he'll toss you on the balcony like he did all the others.”

I shook my head, "that's not true, Octavia. Please just put aside your grudge and get to know him at dinner. I swear you'll like him," I smiled as the knock sounded telling me the dinner was ready, "he already likes you.”

She mumbled something as I turned us towards the door. Miller was the guard waiting, Raven looked surprised as she stopped in the doorway. Octavia walked with me, I sighed, "he doesn't know about Harper. Please don't mention her.”

She looked surprised, her eyebrow raised like I had shared a secret she was interested in. Miller followed us towards the dining room. I realized we hadn't actually shared a meal here in the time I had spent with him. This was nice, using it for the first time with my sister. 

Finn found his way to the table first, followed by Raven. I sat down next to the king’s chair, Octavia sat across from me. Raven was to my right, Finn was next to my sister. She looked at me, unsure why she was here. I was unsure as well, but I wasn't going to let her think she wasn't welcome.

"Raven this is my sister Octavia," she actually smiled as Raven took her hand across the table, "O this is my hand maiden and friend, Raven Reyes. She's pretty awesome.”

Raven blushed as Octavia laughed, "I've heard a lot about you Octavia. Your sister seems to think very highly of you.”

I smiled as Octavia looked amused, "yeah well I always thought highly of my sister too," she paused her eyes finding mine, "until now.”

Bellamy came stomping into the room last, before I had a chance to tell my sister to cool it. He glanced at me before throwing himself down in his chair. I couldn't help but notice the mask was back. He had closed himself off to me and the rest of the people gathered around the table. I reached towards him, my hand grazing my plate. He pulled away before my hand could find his.

"Bellamy," he didn't look at me. His jaw was stiff, his shoulders tense. He watched the cook bring in the food and Finn watched us. I could tell his cousin had something to do with his sudden anger towards me. I looked at Finn, his smile small but it was there. I could see he was trying to get in between us. I thought he had liked me, but apparently he didn’t want his cousin to be happy.

Because Bellamy was clearly upset with me. He wouldn’t even look at me as I cleared my throat. 

Fine two could play that game, "so Octavia how is dad? Tell me he's doing better than when I saw him last.”

She broke her bread and ate it slowly. I could tell it pained her, but she was starving. She was too thin, I could tell she wasn't eating right, "he's trying to find a purpose. Him and Wells have taken to practicing their swordsmanship every morning. I usually wake up to one of them screaming.”

I laughed, "Wells was always good with a sword. Taught me everything I know.”

Bellamy's eyes went wide, his ears perked up. That hit a nerve I could tell. Good, he was going to shut down so was I, "you wanted to learn to hold a sword.”

I shrugged, "yes, I never said I didn't know how. I wanted to give you some confidence my lord.”

His eyes darkened as I used the name he hated the most. I smiled as I took a bite of the food, feeling his eyes burning a hole in my skull. Octavia looked interested as we had our silent disagreement. She was smiling, happy to have caused problems in what was our otherwise happy marriage. She didn't realize we had bigger problems than her pettiness.

Finn cleared his throat, "so Octavia do you know why your sister volunteered for this? I mean she wouldn't tell anyone.”

It had been a while since someone asked me that question. I looked at Finn, wondering why he was bringing it up now. Octavia wouldn’t tell him, I asked her not to. No matter how much we fought or how mad we were we would never betray each other. We were loyal to a fault, it was something our mom had instilled in us at a young age. The one lesson I held onto long after she died. Finn was up to something, I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I knew the reason Bellamy was angry with me was because of him.

My eyes went wide as she shook her head, "no. All I know is one morning I woke up to find her gone. She left a note, all it said was please don't follow.”

Bellamy looked at me. His deep voice was harsh, "care to share your motives?”

"I didn't have any motives," I whispered taking a drink from my cup, "I told you that.”

He scuffed, his fingers drumming against the wooden table, "you know I promised I wouldn't ever lie to you. I told you the truth.”

He threw his fist down causing the table to shake. Finn’s eyes went wide as Bellamy stared at me. I wasn't frightened this was all a show. Octavia gripped her fork tightly, I knew exactly what she was thinking. For a second I thought about letting her go through with it. The man I had married reappeared. The hatred I held for him wasn't too far behind.

"Bellamy you didn't," Finn’s voice broke through the tense silence. Apparently he hadn’t told his right hand man that I knew about the curse. I wondered if he had questioned why the king had suddenly taken an even bigger interest in finding a way out of the curse, "you've ruined everything.”

He nodded his head slowly. His eyes were dark as he looked at me through his lashes. My heart fell at his stoic expression, "apparently I have. Because I chose the wrong girl to save.”

I bit my lip, the anger subsiding as the hurt set in. I wouldn’t keep fighting him. Not when we had made so much progress together. I swallowed my pride and then let out a slow breath, "Bellamy I'm sorry.”

"No," he pushed my hands away. Raven gasped, from any other angle it looked like he was getting ready to strike me as he held his hand up in the air. Octavia flew out of her seat as I stared at him, daring him to hit me. She had the fork positioned at his throat, Miller was too far behind. Finn didn't move as we all watched my sister threaten him.

"Don't you dare lay a hand on her," her voice was even, slow and dangerous, "or I'll end you.”

His eyes found mine and before I could help him, he started laughing. It wasn't the laughter we had shared while getting to know each other. It was the laughter he had expressed before he got to know me. The evil kind that held no humor at all.

"You think you'll end me little girl? Your sister thought the same thing once. Then I ruined her for all other men," my mouth fell open as he looked past me, "I'm sure your mother was a whore of a woman too.”

Octavia pressed the tip of her fork hard against his skin. If she applied more pressure she would draw blood. My heart stopped, I wasn't ready for this fight. I couldn't choose between my sister and my king. I screamed, trying to make her stop her attack, as Miller grabbed her hair and pulled her away. I stood up and looked at my husband, "I thought we finally had an understanding," my voice was soft as Octavia got away from the guard.

Bellamy's eyes were dark and hard, "I thought you would never lie to me.”

We stood there staring at each other as Octavia stormed out of the dining room her dinner untouched. I knew I should go after her, but I couldn't move. This wasn't Bellamy, this wasn't the man who had saved me twice, the man who held me in his arms at night. This was the monster I had feared, the monster I had tried to put an end to.

"This isn't you," I whispered as he stood up. I grabbed his face, holding him in place as he avoided my eyes, "this isn't my husband.”

He shook his head, my grip lost as he sighed and turned away from me. Before he left the room his dark eyes found mine and I could feel the coldness from his words seep into my body as he spoke, "since you can't even tell me the truth, maybe I was never meant to be your husband."

He walked out of the room, leaving me standing there alone wondering how I was going to clean up this mess. I knew I had to tell him the truth, it was only fair. But once the truth was out, I was sure he wouldn't see me the same way. The cold seeped into my bones as I realized how scared I was of losing my husband. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The king and queen finally share the perfect moment together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS! this chapter has been written for a while now, probably the second one I wrote after I knew where the story was heading. I'm so excited to finally post it!!! I know you'll alllll enjoy bellarke =)
> 
> I'm a big sucker for even numbers, so this looks like it's going to have 20 chapters in total (20 being the epilogue)
> 
> Thanks for the comments and I love to see your theories. We're getting close, will they break the curse or will the curse tear about the happily ever after they're both wishing for???

I knew it was selfish and foolish to follow Bellamy instead of Octavia, but he was my husband. After everything we had been through I had to prove I still cared. Bellamy’s shoulders were tense as I closed his bedroom door behind me. My heart was pounding, my throat dry. I hadn't been this nervous or scared since I arrived at the castle. I ran my hands down my dress, hoping I could get through to him. Octavia had upset him. The balance between us was gone.

"Bellamy," my voice was soft, "please talk to me.”

He shook my hand off his shoulder, "your sister has come to rescue you. Apparently everything that I thought was real was a lie," he refused to look at me, "Finn was right.”

I swallowed my tears, "no. I had no idea she would do this. Everything is real, Bellamy. I promise you I've never lied. Octavia doesn't know what's happened between us.”

He was silent when he finally turned around to face me. His eyes were dark, the circles underneath looked bigger. He shook his head, "I know why you volunteered.”

"What?" I was confused, my eyes going towards the wall. I had put the journal back. He couldn't have known I read his letters. He couldn't have known I searched for her name and mine. But then it clicked, the reason why he had been so angry during dinner. If he knew the truth he thought everything I told him was a lie.

He couldn’t possibly think I had fallen in love with him now.

He raised an eyebrow at me, "you want me to be honest with you. I've told you the truth, I told you about the curse. And yet you've never told me why you raised your hand knowing you would die.”

I looked back at him, knowing he was right. I never offered him the truth, but then again the truth didn't matter now. I had volunteered for my friend, I wanted justice. I never knew I would fall in love with the man who took her away. I didn't know what to say. My hands were sweating, my mouth was dry. 

I shook my head, “Bellamy."

He put his hand up, telling me to stop. He closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. I was about to yell at him for interrupting me. I wasn't one of his subjects, didn't obey him like his guards. I didn't get a chance, he beat me to the punch.

"Harper Griffin," the name stopped me, my anger fading as I watched him open his big brown eyes. They were full of anger and shame, they were the haunted eyes that met me at the end of the alter. Tears gathered in my eyes as he threw a dagger at my feet. His eyes were hard and cold, "she was your cousin.”

I opened my mouth, only to snap it shut again. I didn’t know what to say, how to apologize for a plan I never put into action. I felt guilty for keeping this secret, I was ashamed for failing my cousin. But I would never regret falling in love with the man standing in front of me. No matter what happens next, what happens after this fight, I would love him until my very last day.

Bellamy stood up taller, "Finn figured it out. He told me you were dangerous, that I would end up dead if I saved you. So the way I see it is that we have two choices here. You finish what you started and thrust that dagger through my chest. Or you leave with your sister.”

I stopped breathing as I thought about both of those options. I shook my head, "no Bellamy. Let me explain.”

I walked towards him, he backed away from my touch, "Clarke don't. I thought you were different. I thought this would work. Obviously I was wrong.”

"No you weren't. Bellamy I came here to avenge my cousin's death. Harper was more than my cousin, she was my best friend. But then you gave me an extra day, you listened to my story. You saved me not once but twice from an execution. I didn't realize it until it was too late but I fell for you. I don't want you dead anymore," a tear fell down my cheek, "I couldn't do it. I realized you weren't a monster, that you have a soul. I never planned on leaving you either.”

He was staring at me stoically, watching me breakdown in front of him, "then why is your sister here? She claims she wants to take you home.”

I shook my head, "this is my home, here with you. Bellamy trust me Octavia has a mind of her own. I never told her to break me out. I never realized she'd come and try.”

He clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth, "how am I suppose to believe you?”

"Because I'm your wife," I threw his favorite reason back at him, "that's why. I wouldn't have stayed if I didn't want to, Bellamy. But I did. I stayed and somehow you made me care for you. I won't leave, I sure as hell won't kill you either.”

His mask slipped, his hands balled into fists at his sides. I took a step towards him, he didn't back away this time. My hands were steady as I stood there feeling the weight of my own secret fall off my shoulders. I swallowed the rest of my tears and pulled myself back together. I couldn't say the same for the king. He looked ready to fall apart as I closed the distance between us.

"Clarke please. You came here for a reason, to find out the truth. I've given you the truth, now finish what you started.”

I knew he wanted this. He was so full of hatred for himself he didn't believe he deserved to be the king. He didn't think he deserved to live a life with me as his queen. I shook my head slowly, my heart hurting for the boy in front of me. I wondered what kind of man he would've become had his life been different. 

"No," I finally said, my voice stronger than I felt, "I won't give you what you want, death is the cowards way out.”

He looked surprised, "I don't deserve any of this.”

"If you need forgiveness I'll give that to you. I forgive you," my voice broke as I put my hand against his cheek, realizing it was true, "I forgive you Bellamy.”

A tear fell down his cheek, "I don't deserve it.”

I nodded, pulling on his arm, "yes you do, Bell. You deserve forgiveness and love. You deserve a life that you want to live, not a kingdom you have to run. I forgive you. I know Harper would’ve too. Maybe you don’t believe me, but I’m sure that if the rest of the families knew the truth they would too.”

He shook his head, “they’ll never forgive the man who killed their child. I’ve taken away the one thing they’re supposed to believe in.”

I sighed, keeping his eyes one mine, “well I know that I love you. Please find it inside to forgive yourself.”

He kept staring at me, my heart pounding. We had been fighting loudly, I'm sure Miller heard every word we said. I didn't want to leave. I didn't care that he knew Harper was the reason why I was here. I just wanted him to realize that she wasn't the reason I stayed.

He was.

Something changed in the air between us. It was like our hearts clicked into place, the forgiveness hovered over our heads. Bellamy closed the distance between us, wrapping his arms around my waist. I pressed my chest against his, his mouth claiming mine as his own. I shivered as he kissed me, my fingers tangling up in his hair. I smiled as I tasted his tears.

His voice was soft as he pulled away. His ran his thumb across my chin, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have listened to Finn. I just can’t believe you stayed, after everything. I can’t believe you’re still here telling me you love me.”

I laughed quietly, “I was afraid to tell you my truth. I’m sorry too. Finn is only trying to keep you safe.”

Bellamy pressed his lips to mine, kissing me once more. I smiled as his hands held my face steady, my heart pounding inside my chest. These were the moments that made me see just how much I cared about him. I didn’t care that he was the king, or that he was cursed. All I cared about was Bellamy and the way he made me feel. The way I made him feel. He could be poor, living in my village and I still would’ve looked at him like he hung the stars in the sky.

Maybe Octavia was right, we were supposed to be together. Maybe the curse was no match for the feelings we had for each other.

"You make this life worth living," he whispered as he pulled away. He pressed his forehead to mine, his finger drawing circles on my forearm, "please don't ever leave.”

I smiled, pushing my lips against his once more. I wrapped my arms around his neck, telling him I would never walk away. I closed my eyes, reveling in his touch. I could only hope Octavia had turned in for the night. I didn't need her tracking me down now that we were finally both on the same page. 

I pulled at his shirt, the fabric thin behind my hands. I smiled as he held onto my hips tightly, his kisses getting deeper, harder. I knew what we both wanted. I just didn't realize how much we both needed the release until that very moment. I ran my hands down his arms, our lips still connected.

I pulled back, "Bellamy," his name was a whimper, a sigh. It was a air that came at the end of a deep breath that cleared your lungs. He was my home, my person. I smiled as I looked at him, waiting for him to take me and claim me as his wife once more.

“Clarke," he ran his thumb across my bottom lip, "or as I prefer, Mrs. Blake.”

I couldn't stop smiling as he called me that. Now that I knew everything, the secrets and our feelings were finally out in the open, I realized I was really his wife. We were married and we would find a way through this curse together. I closed my eyes, letting his touch soothe the pain I had been feeling for the last few weeks.

Bellamy didn't wait long to continue where we left off. He ran his hand down my back, pressing his body against mine. I smiled as he kissed me, soft and slow. So much different from all the other kisses, this wasn't needy or clingy. We both knew we had each other for longer than one day.

"Clarke," his deep voice startled me as he pulled away. My hands reached for his shoulder, "are you sure? It will be different this time.”

I smiled, knowing that it would be better than the first time around. I nodded my head, biting my lip as I pressed my chest against his. He led me backwards, laying me down on the mattress. Both our breathing was heavy as he pulled down the zipper to my dress, the cold air flowing over my body. I welcomed his warm skin against mine.

"Bellamy," I whispered, my moan caught by his mouth. His hand slid down my side, making me shiver against his touch, "I love you.”

He stopped kissing me, pulling back to look down. His brown eyes were beautiful, a real smile spread across his face. I smiled back, my heart hammering inside my chest. I wasn't supposed to love the man who killed my cousin, the man who forced his brides to die. But somehow I did, I fell in love with the haunted man, who's pain mirrored my own. 

He didn't want them to die anymore than he wanted to die. It wasn't his choice.

"I love you, my queen," he whispered as he positioned himself above me, "I think I always have.”

I smiled, lacing my fingers through his as he brought our hands up above my head. His eyes were sparkling, his heart hammering against his chest and into mine. I felt my desire roll down my spine, I needed him. I moaned as his body moved against mine, his lips pressed against the soft skin of my neck. His mouth caught mine right as he joined us together, my body suddenly well aware of how different this was. 

Our first night it had been physical, no emotions were brought into play. Now he was kissing me, he was touching me, we weren't just having sex. We were making love, and it was way more satisfying than the first time around. 

I sat up, rolling us over so that I was above him. I felt him move deeper, arching my back as I gasped at the feeling. I let out a whimper as he met my hips, thrusting up into me. I closed my eyes, his lips attached to my neck. 

"You're beautiful," his hands moved down my sides as he sat up and pushed deeper, slower. He was teasing me, I couldn't take it anymore. I needed to feel release. I wanted to scream out his name so the castle knew he was mine.

I opened my eyes and looked at him, feeling more for the king than I had since we met. I never knew love could be all consuming, "my king," I whispered pressing my mouth to his. 

His lips devoured mine, "my queen.”

My fingers tangled in his hair as I pulled away. I was panting and whining. I squeezing my eyes shut as he moved a little faster. I couldn't take his teasing anymore. I moaned as his fingers touched my skin. 

"Faster," I breathed into his ear as I rolled my hips and he hit the perfect spot, "yes please. Bellamy, faster.”

He laughed as I felt myself losing control. He rolled us back over, pulling my hands up above my head once more. He laced our fingers together, “Clarke, my Clarke.”

I gasped as he pushed deeper, my eyes closing. My moans got louder, I heard him laugh above me, his lips trailing kisses down my neck, around my chest and back up. As I opened my eyes, his fingers squeezed mine. I was on the verge of losing it all together.

Bellamy's eyes held mine as his movements slowed, “God I love you," he whispered.

My body arched as the build in my stomach released, my eyes rolling backwards. Bellamy followed me, his body tense as we came down from our highs together. He rolled onto the bed beside me, his fingers staying laced through mine.

I turned to face him, pulling the blankets up around me, “I’m sorry,” I whispered after a moment of silence, “I should’ve told you about Harper. I just, things changed between us and it wasn’t the reason why I stayed anymore.”

Bellamy pressed a kiss to my forehead, “I know,” his voice was soft, “I understand. Let’s just promise to tell each other the truth from now.”

I held up my pinkie and he smiled, “I promise,” I said wrapping my finger around his. He laughed as I kissed him, feeling the world fade around us.

“Your sister should visit more often,” he whispered pulling away and looking at me with his beautiful brown eyes.

I laughed as the tips of his fingers ran down my arm, “or maybe we should just fight and make up more often.”

I was staring up at the ceiling as we fell into our own thoughts. I was happy, more than happy to share this moment with my husband, but I was still terrified that I would lose him. This curse was hurting more than just the king now. It was killing the entire kingdom, it was killing the people he was supposed to care for.

I looked at my husband, “promise me we will find a way to breathe curse,” I pulled myself up onto my elbows and let my hair skim across his chest. He shivered under my touch, he looked tired as he laid there beside me.

"We will find a way to break the curse together," he whispered, running a finger along my bottom lip.

There were tears in my eyes, “good, because I can't lose you too.”

He pulled me close, pressing a kiss against my temple, "you'll never lose me. I promise you that.”

I smiled, leaning my head against his chest. His arm came around my waist and held me close against him. I closed my eyes, ready to give into sleep. Except I knew the man holding me in his arms wouldn't be able to sleep, because someone had made it that way. He would never be granted a single moment of happiness, because of a choice someone else had made.

I laid my hand across his heart, feeling the weight of the day weigh down on me, "sleep my love, tomorrow we will fight the dragons. Together.”

"Together," I whispered and then nodded, kissing his skin before I drifted off to sleep.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Octavia put aside their differences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was important to me because 1. there were questions about how octavia felt about the king and 2. because I wanted Clarke to tell the truth to someone other than the people in the castle. This is where she realizes she truly forgave Bellamy and that she can be in love with someone who caused so much pain. 
> 
> We're getting close to the end. i don't want to finish because I LOVE writing this story! and I love all you beautiful readers who comment. Thanks so much =)
> 
> Oh and has anyone seen all the awesome info from Comicon happening?!?! So much season 3 feels!

****When I finally located my sister that afternoon, she was wandering around in the garden. I saw her smiling as she smelled the flowers, she had always loved nature. She had always been running around outdoors, following Lincoln on his hikes. She was more in tune with nature than I was. She was happy out here in the flowers, she was in her element. I watched her enjoy the castle without me knowing. I knew she wanted to hate it here, but I could see her adjusting.

I tried to talk to her last night after Bellamy and I made up. She wouldn’t open my bedroom door. I heard her crying, it broke my heart to know I had caused her that much pain. I hated knowing that she was upset with me. Bellamy came to find me when he found the bed empty. He carried me to our bed and kissed away my tears. I should’ve been happy, Bellamy and I had made a huge step as husband and wife. We were no longer strangers, we were a couple. That was more than enough to call for a celebration.

But we weren’t celebrating. Instead I was trying to convince my sister not to hate me.

I sighed, stood up straighter and walked towards Octavia. We were going to settle this once and for all. She was my little sister, I had pretty much raised her. She was going to listen to me, and I would listen to her. I would hear her out, I would take her feelings into account. But I wouldn’t let her shut down my life, telling me I was wrong for loving the person I did, because of her closed mind.

I didn’t raise her to keep such a closed mind. I knew she was better than this, grudges did nothing but pull you down into the anger.

The sun was high in the sky, it was hot. My mouth went dry within seconds of being outside. I could feel my skin burning, Octavia had been blessed with the dark skin, the dark features. She was kneeling down, a flower brushing against her nose. I smiled as she looked up at me.

She didn’t smile back.

“Hey,” I offered quietly as she stood up. We stood staring at each other, this was the only time I could ever recall feeling awkward around my sister, “can we talk about what happened last night? Or just talk?”

She nodded, squinting at me, “yeah,” she sighed, “I’m done being mad. I’ve missed you for too long to hold onto the anger I feel.”

I hugged her tightly, she didn’t fight me. I was glad she had gotten over our little disagreement last night. I loved my baby sister, she was the only one I had. I held onto her tightly as I tried to find the words to say I’m sorry. I pulled away and felt a tear fall down my cheek. She laughed, wiping her own away.

“I’m sorry,” she beat me to it, “I was a brat last night, I don’t want to believe Bellamy is a good guy. Last night, I was angry that you went after him and not me. I’ve never known a Clarke who doesn’t put me first and that hurt me. It scared me to see you here for more reasons than the obvious.”

I sighed, “it is different, isn’t it? I just,” I tried to fight off the tears, “you’re important to me too, Octavia. You’re my little sister. I just want you to like the person I am with. I want you to know that I’m happy, the way you’re happy with Lincoln.”

She smiled, “I can see how happy he makes you. I can promise that I’ll try,” her voice caught as she squeezed my hand, “I’ll try for you.”

I hugged her close, feeling the calm after the storm settle around us. I was glad she was here, even if she had broken in. I was glad my sister had come to rescue me, because I had been homesick before I even knew I was. I just wanted to know she was strong and that she was taken care of. She just wanted to know I was alive and not being held against my will. We both got the answers we were hoping for.

She just got a bigger truth than anyone outside the castle realized was happening.

"So what happened last night?" Octavia pulled her hair up off her shoulders.

I laughed, "I told him the truth. He uh, he told me he knew about Harper. So I told him everything," I sighed as my sister raised an eyebrow, "then he told me to finish what I started and threw a dagger at my feet.”

She looked as surprised as I had been last night, "what? Wow no wonder you didn't come back to your bedroom."

I blushed, "well actually I don't sleep there anymore. I uh, one of the guards sort of attacked me and I've taken to sleeping with the king.”

She laughed, "I shouldn't be surprised. You seem to really like him.”

I grabbed her hands, "I do O, I really do. I tried to stop it, when it started happening I still hated him. But once I realized he wasn't the monster we thought he was, I fell hard."

She hugged me tightly, "I'm glad you're still alive. I'm glad you're happy.”

I smiled, "thanks little sis," I whispered feeling better than ever now that I knew my sister was accepting of my relationship, "I never wanted you to hate him.”

We were quiet, watching the clouds roll by. I sat down on the grass, the needles tickling my legs. Octavia followed my lead and took a seat beside me. She sighed as I glanced towards her. I realized she was wearing one of my dresses, her battle armor was gone. Her hair was still braided, but her face was clean. She looked younger in the light pink dress.

She looked like my little sister again.

“So why did you write to Lincoln? I have to be honest I was a little hurt to see that given the chance to contact us you choose Lincoln first.”

I bit my lip, "it's complicated," my voice was quiet. My mind was tired of thinking about the curse, running through the motions of the day while trying to find a cure. I knew I could trust Octavia, but I wasn't sure she needed to know. What if she was put in danger because of it?

"Sometimes things become less complicated when they're talked about.”

I nudged her shoulder with mine, "I can't believe you're using one of mom's lines on me. God you're so old now.”

She laughed, something she hadn't done since we were reunited. It was nice, I could see her adjusting, "I'm serious. Clarke I'm not a little girl anymore. I want to help," she looked at me.

I closed my eyes, "the king is cursed," my voice was soft, the wind carried it away as I told her everything Bellamy had told me. It sounded weird, like I was making up another story. The words were weaving together like a fairytale, but they were the truth. I didn't go into as much detail, she didn't need to know everything about Roma. 

Once I was finished I opened my eyes, "Lincoln has always been inquisitive about magic. He's always healed the sick, found a way to make ends meet. I thought if anyone from home could help it would be him.”

Octavia knew better than any of us how capable Lincoln was of helping, "I should've given him the letter. I'm sorry, I just wanted to see you.”

"It's okay," I wouldn't make her feel bad for missing me. She was important to me, "not all is lost. I'm sure Lincoln will come looking for you once he realizes you're gone.”

She smiled, biting her top lip, “he is pretty protective isn't he?”

"It just means he loves you," I hit her with my shoulder again, enjoying this afternoon with my sister. It had been a long time since we sat and talked about our lives. Even before Harper was taken we had started to grow apart. Lincoln made her happy, I stepped into the background to let her find her way with him.

Octavia looked at me with big eyes, "sort of like the king? I've seen the way he looks at you. He looks at you like you hung the moon.”

I felt blood rush to my cheeks as I looked away from her. He had become softer with me. And now after last night he was even more patient. It wasn't like I hadn't noticed the way he looked at me, the way his smile would appear slowly. That didn't mean I wanted to talk about it.

"I wouldn't go that far," my voice caught, "he really does like me doesn't he?”

She giggled, making me feel even more like a teenager, "this is weird, talking about boys with you. You've always been my mom, you've always told me to be careful with my heart."

I pushed a stray hair behind her ear, "I still think you should be careful with your heart. But when it's real, you take a risk anyways. Because you would rather jump in than wonder what it would've been like if you had never given them a chance.”

"You never believed me when I told you that's what it's like with Lincoln. You told me I was too young to know love and that I was going to get hurt," I remembered our fights when they first met. She was right I had been set against their relationship. 

I nodded, "I'm sorry. There is no age for love, Octavia. I realize that now. I guess you have to experience it to realize how amazing and truly special it is to fall in love with the person who's meant for you.”

She hugged me tightly, "oh my gosh, my little Clarke has grown up.”

I pushed her back and she laughed loudly as I tried to tickle her sides. We were both too ticklish for our own good. She batted my hands away as we regained our composure. I wished Raven was here, she would've loved this side of Octavia. Sadly she had only gotten to know the angry side.

“When you were born mom pulled me up onto the bed beside her and placed you in my arms,” I swallowed the memory as I looked away from my sister, “she told me that a sister is the most precious gift you were given and that I had to make sure you were safe. I was responsible for you, I was to look out for you.”

My eyes were filled with tears as she looked at me, “Clarke that didn’t mean you have to give up your life for mine.”

I nodded, “you're my sister, my responsibility. Mom told me one day we would be best friends, we would rely on each other for strength and for advice. I think this is the moment she was talking about. She knew we would need each other in order to face something like this. Sometime bigger than both of us.”

She smiled, wrapping her arms around my neck, “I love you big sister,” a tear slipped down her cheek as I laid my hand on top of hers. If our mom could see us now I knew she would be smiling. She always wanted us to be more than sisters, she wanted us to be friends.

Octavia swallowed her tears and played with the bottom of her dress. For a moment I forgot about the curse and the horrible future I might face here in the kingdom. For a second I imagined my sister here with me, happy and content within the walls of the castle. I saw toddlers tan like Lincoln waddling around, Octavia chasing after them. 

It was a painful picture. Because I knew if we didn't find a way out soon, I could never have a future as beautiful as that.

"What does Bellamy do all day if he isn't spending time with you?" Her voice startled me as I snapped out of my trance. 

I laughed at her question, "he is the King, O. He has business he has to take care of, a kingdom to run. The drought has got him working overtime to find a water source so the crops don't die and everyone starves.”

She nodded, "true. I just imagined him following you around like a puppy," she laughed, "the way Lexa used to.”

I rolled my eyes, "no. He does not follow me around like a puppy. But I'm glad you think my husband would be more fearful of me than the other way around.”

She laughed loudly, "I've seen you angry Clarke, I'm scared of you."

I shook my head, "God I've missed you Octavia.”

She hugged my side as we sat together, the shadow from the tree keeping us cool. The kingdom was beautiful from the garden, it was even more breathtaking at night. I would have to bring her out here, I would have to show my sister how amazing this place really was. 

The sun wasn't as high in the sky, I knew we had been out here for a while. I was surprised Raven hadn't come looking for me. Then again I'm sure she was dealing with her own little secret. She had been getting sicker as the month passed. 

Octavia squinted at the sky, "think we should head in? I'm getting pretty hot and I'm sure that dinner will be ready soon.”

She nodded, "sure. Maybe we can actually eat this dinner without stabbing someone with a fork.”

I laughed as Octavia stood up first, "that was all you.”

"I make use of what I've got handy," she shrugged and then offered me her hands. She pulled me up fast, I felt light headed for a moment. I closed my eyes, her hands letting me go. 

The feeling didn't go away. I was afraid to open my eyes. I was pretty sure if I opened then I would fall down. I shivered despite the heat, my palms were sweaty. I let out a slow breath, opening my eyes.

I was right, I felt worse than when my eyes were closed.

"Octavia," I reached for her, the ground was spinning. My hands started to shake as black spots appeared before my eyes, "something's wrong.”

She looked at me confused. I must have looked terrible because her confusion gave way to panic as she grabbed my arm, "Clarke. Hey, look at me.”

I closed my eyes, "call for Raven or Bellamy," I winced as my stomach turned and suddenly my entire lunch came back up. I puked into the bushes as my sister held my hair back. I heard her call Miller over, telling him to find Bellamy. 

I would've smiled if I wasn't in so much pain. 

She squeezed my hand, "you're going to be okay," she said as I stumbled to stand up a little straighter. I spit, wiping my mouth on the back of my hand. I groaned as the heat hit me.

I shook my head, "I don't think so,” sweat had gathered on my forehead as I felt the urge to puke once again. I grabbed my sisters arm as I closed my eyes, “Octavia."

She screamed as I collapsed, her arms catching me before I hit the ground. My eyes were closed as Octavia yelled for Bellamy. Her grip on my shoulders tightened as my body started to shake. I couldn't control what was happening to me, my body wasn't mine. 

I heard voices, a deep voice yelling for people to get out of the way. I felt a hand press against my cheek, that same deep voice begging me to stay. I wanted to stay, I wanted to tell him I was okay. Every fiber in my body screamed for me to open my eyes and look up at my husband who sounded so worried about me.

But I couldn't open my eyes, instead I stopped fighting exhausted from the pain and surrendered to the darkness that pulled me under.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The curse has gotten worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to love the evil that is cliff hangers. I had an entire chapter written and have to change it around to fit my newest cliff hanger... brace yourselves it's coming.
> 
> Thanks for the comments and love I love it! this story is so much fun and addicting.

My body was burning, my skin felt like it was on fire. The pressure in my head was pounding, my throat was dry. My eyes opened slowly, I felt a mattress under me. My hair was spread out around my shoulders, a pillow supported my head. The heat was gone, I was still sweaty, but the cool air felt like heaven. Someone was holding my hand, a cloth was laid across my forehead. I kicked the blanket, pulling the hand attached to mine, groaning as my stomach twisted in pain. 

"Clarke," Bellamy was the one holding my hand. He looked worried as I turned sideways.

"Bell?" I asked confused as to how I ended up in his bedroom. Octavia was on my other side, Raven was standing by the bed. She looked as worried as the rest of them. I couldn't help but smile at her small bump.

Bellamy pushed my hair off my forehead, "shh it's okay. You fainted in the garden, Octavia sent Miller to find me.”

"Water," I looked to Raven as she handed me a glass. Bellamy helped me sit up, his hand never leaving mine as I drank the entire thing. I could feel it slosh around in my stomach. I was going to get sick again, I already knew it.

I squeezed his hand, tears filling my eyes, "is this part of the curse?”

My husband sighed, I could see the worry on his face. He was just as scared as I was, "I don't know, Clarke. I really hope it's not.”

Raven sighed, "tell me what's wrong," she sounded like a mother already, "Octavia said you threw up before you fainted.”

I nodded, holding onto Bellamy's hand tightly for support as I sat up, "my stomach flipped, it feels like it's in knots. The ground started to spin, my hands were shaking. I felt ready to pass out when she grabbed me.”

Bellamy shook his head, but Raven spoke before he could say anything, "you need rest. You need real sleep.”

"No we need to break this," I stopped as Bellamy closed his eyes. He was blaming himself I could already see it, "hey, Bellamy stop.”

He didn't look at me, "stop what? Hating myself because you're sick? Blaming myself for a curse that I could've stopped had I paid attention to my wife? I can't stop, Clarke," his voice broke, "I love you and it's literally killing you.”

My eyes filled up with tears as Octavia pressed her hand against my shoulder. I could see this was all it took. She knew what we had was real now.

I sighed, "I am stronger than a curse or two. I love you too," I squeezed his hand. It wasn't hard, "we will find a way to break it, we have to. You deserve to be happy.”

"No I don't," he whispered, pressing his lips to my forehead, "but you do.”

"And I'm happy with you.”

The room grew silent as we sat there together. Bellamy kept staring at the empty room in front of him. I looked at him, remembering how lonely I had been before I came to the castle. I thought coming here would give me purpose. I thought avenging my cousins death would finally mean I did something for the greater good. But I was wrong.

Coming to the castle did give me a purpose, but it wasn't the one I expected. I had fallen in love with the king and stumbled into a life I wasn't ready to leave. I loved my husband, I wanted to spend my days filled with his laughter and standing beside him. He might not believe me, but after all he's been through he does deserve to be happy. 

"One day you'll see," I whispered as a commotion sounded outside the room, "you deserve happiness too.”

He shook his head and I winced, squeezing his hand hard as I leaned forward, my arm pressing against my stomach. Raven grabbed the trash can thrusting it under my chin just as the water came back up. There was nothing but water in my stomach. But it came back up, pinching my stomach as it emptied completely.

Bellamy held my hair back, "she needs food. She's not going to get better without something in her stomach.”

Raven glared at him, "she can't keep anything down Bellamy. What do you suggest? We stick an IV in her?”

He muttered something about how she wasn’t supposed to speak to him that way. I smiled at my hand maiden, we had learned a thing or two from each other. I knew he wanted to help, but Raven was right. My stomach was too upset, too tender to even think about housing food. It might help the aches in my head and my body, but it would only end up back in the trashcan. I hated everyone watching me get sick, they all just stood there staring at my face turned red and I stuck my head into the metal bin.

Raven rolled her eyes at the king as Miller came into the room. He looked embarrassed when he saw me laying on the bed. At least someone else felt awkward with the scene at hand, "Bellamy, there's uh, someone at the door. He says he knows the queen.”

Miller barley got the words out before the door opened once more and then someone else came walking through the door. I couldn't see, my vision was blurry as I held onto Bellamy. I didn't want him to leave me, not yet. 

"Lincoln!" Octavia's squeal shattered my ears as I ran my hands through my hair. My stomach was tight, my skin was pale. I felt like death itself and I couldn't stop wondering if it was part of the curse. Everything that happened these days made me question if it was real or magic.

Bellamy held onto me tighter, sensing my need for him. I felt his lips press against the top of my head as I opened my eyes, "I'm here," he whispered softly. His hand was rubbing circles around my back. It felt like heaven, he took the pressure off my headache.

"This sucks," I moaned as I laid back down, my head hitting the pillow. Bellamy kept his fingers laced through mine. I could get used to this Bellamy, the king who truly cared about me.

Raven pressed the cloth against my forehead as I winced in pain. I felt nauseous, but my stomach had already emptied everything. Bellamy was standing on the other side of me. He wouldn't leave my side as Raven tried to make me feel better.

"What's wrong? Why is she sick?" His deep voice was angry. I coughed, wincing as the pain shot to my head. 

Raven sighed, Octavia coming back beside me, "I don't know. It's probably just the flu. She's warm, she has a fever. I'll keep watching her,” her eyes came to rest on his, "it can't be the curse. Magic doesn't work like this."

"We don't know how magic works because it isn't supposed to work," his voice was hard but soft. I could tell he was getting run down by the curse. He was ready to give up on the search, he was ready to sacrifice everything we had to stop whatever it was happening to me. He shook his head, "she's my wife I will stay with her.”

I smiled as he sat down beside me, "I love you, but I don't really want you to see me sick. I don't think you'd appreciate me puking all over you.”

He laughed, his fingers lacing through mine before pressing a kiss to the back of my clammy hand, "I'll take my chances.”

He ran his fingers through my hair, it felt wonderful. I closed my eyes as Lincoln cleared his throat. I snapped them open as my sister and him stood at the door to Bellamy's bedroom. Miller was watching Lincoln closely.

"My king," Lincoln bowed as he saw me, "I came on behalf of Clarke and her family to bring this one home.”

Bellamy looked at Lincoln, then back down at me. I sighed, pulling myself up and laying my head on his lap, "Lincoln. I've missed you.”

He laughed, "yeah, I've missed you Clarke.”

I shook my head, "you were supposed to look out for her," Octavia smiled as I mocked her attempt at saving me, "apparently you didn't watch her close enough.”

He laughed, "you know your sister. If she wants something she won't be talked out of it.”

I nodded as I closed my eyes, my stomach turning over. I closed my mouth, fighting off the spinning feeling that came over me. Bellamy took the cloth from Raven and held it against my head. I groaned as everyone stood around watching me. I hated being sick, I hated needing someone else to take care of me.

Bellamy sighed as he ran his fingers through my hair again, "I think the queen would like her sister to stay for a little longer.”

I smiled at him through my pain, thankful that they had overcome their differences. I did want Octavia here with me. Especially since I was sick, she wouldn't baby me. She would tell me to suck it up and get out of bed. Sometimes I was still surprised he knew me as well as he did.

Finn came to a halt behind them, "Bellamy," his voice was tense, "I need to speak with you.”

"Not now Finn," he was staring down at me. I smiled at him weakly, exhausted from the fever or the pain or just this life in general, "I'm not leaving Clarke.”

I looked up at my husband, ready to tell him to go with his cousin to find out what he needs, but I stopped. Finn came closer, taking in a deep breath. His blue eyes looked bright in the sunlight, “Clarke,” he looked surprised to find me in bed.

I pushed a smile through, “Finn.”

He held his hands in front of him and cleared his throat, “I wanted to find you this morning but you were with your sister. I uh,” he looked nervous, which made me laugh despite being sick in bed. I had never seen the king’s right hand man so nervous, “I’m sorry. For trying to get between you and Bellamy, for putting those doubts in his head. It was wrong and I will mind my own business now.”

I turned to look at him completely, Bellamy still holding my hand. I could only imagine the anger Bellamy had bestowed on his this morning when they met. He was tired of everyone trying to tear us apart, “it’s okay,” my voice was weak as I reached for his hand and nodded my head, “I know you’re only trying to keep your cousin safe. You love him, but you have to realize I love him too. Probably more than you do, in different ways. I would never hurt him. I will never betray him.”

Finn looked to Raven who was smiling. I could tell they had fought about this as well. His eyes came back to mine, “I’m glad he has someone like you.”

Bellamy leaned down and kissed my forehead, “I told you there was nothing to worry about Finn. Now we can have this discussion later, I want to stay with her until she feels better. She might need something.”

I shook my head, "I'm fine and I have Raven. Octavia is here too, they’ll both look after me,” I could tell he didn’t want to leave for other reasons, but I wasn’t going to voice them. This wasn’t the curse, I wouldn’t let the curse take me out this way, “go talk to Finn. Maybe he's found something.”

He shook his head, but Lincoln appeared beside the king, "actually if you would be interested I might have some news that will help you, my king. I found the letter the queen intended for me, not Octavia. I can help.”

I smiled at the boy I had grown up envying. He loved Octavia, more than anyone had loved anyone else. I had always been jealous of that. He loved me like a sister, for that I was grateful. Here in this castle I realized just how lucky my sister was to have someone who looked at her the way Lincoln did. I had finally found the one who was it for me. Lincoln winked as Bellamy kept staring at me.

"I knew you'd come through," I whispered, a yawn escaping my lips, "go find the answers we need, Bell. I'm going to sleep, maybe I'll be better once you're done.”

He looked conflicted as he kept holding my hand. He sighed, pressing a kiss against my forehead, squeezing my hand gently, "I love you," he whispered pushing a curl behind my ear, "if you need me I will come right away.”

I nodded, "I love you," I whispered back, smiling as he kissed me without care if I was sick or not. I breathed him in, feeling my heart fill up. It was crazy to realize just how far I had fallen for someone I thought I hated. 

The door closed behind the boys and I closed my eyes, raven and Octavia started to talk about something, but I was tired. I rolled over on my side and pulled the blanket that smelled like Bellamy up around me. I smiled as I drifted off to sleep, imagining a life without curses and castles. A life where my husband and I could finally be happy.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke's fever breaks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so the next few chapters are short, I'm trying to figure out how to either make them longer or agree that quality is better than quantity. I hope you like this chapter, I think it sums up a lot of what's been happening. Some of you guessed it, which hopefully means you want it to happen.
> 
> we have two more real chapters and then the epilogue that keeps getting longer...

My dreams were filled with shadows and evil laughter. The shadows taunted me, my name falling from their lips with laughter. Their faces were dark, their lips curled, sharp teeth showed. I tossed and turned, my body shivering and sweating at the same time.

My sleep wasn't peaceful, it was restless. I called out for Bellamy, the wrong hand grabbed mine. It wasn't his strong, warm, calloused fingers that gripped mine. The skin was soft, cool to the touch. They belonged to a female, which made my heart sink. I just wanted Bellamy. 

I heard voices fighting. Raven and Octavia, I realized were still there in the room with me. I sighed as I let out a half cough half moan. No medicine would take this away. This was something more than a normal illness. I didn't want to believe it, but the curse had finally gotten to me.

The shadows left, they were replaced by the king. He stood on the balcony, his back towards me. I heard a scream, I walked forward. Roma hung off the ledge, I screamed. Bellamy stood completely still as he watched her die, never reaching for me as I cried. 

I slapped him, "wake up," my voice was different even laced with tears it didn't belong to me. I cried out again as he stood there ignoring my pleas, "save her Bellamy!”

The roped went still, my hands shook as I looked down. It wasn't Roma anymore, it was me. I closed my eyes, fighting the scream that built in my throat.  This wasn't real, I knew I was dreaming. But my heart still hurt watching Bellamy stand uncaring by the railing. 

The scene changed, I was inside the castle. There was a baby crying. Bellamy was there, this time he was awake. His eyes were light, his deep voice was soft. He looked at the baby in his arms with love and admiration in his eyes. 

He still looked terrified as his eyes found mine, "Clarke he doesn't want me. Please take him back.”

"He's your son," I whispered running my hand down his arm, "hold him close and tell him the stories you told me before he was born.”

Bellamy looked terrified as the baby screamed in his arms. He kept bouncing him up and down, the sight brought tears to my eyes. It was a scene I never thought was possible. This was a future I knew we wouldn't have. It was a dream within a dream, the life I always wanted, but would never get to see. 

The dream was still beautiful, for a moment I let it be real. I let my mind shut off, I let go of my fears. Until Bellamy changed. His eyes went dark, his arms got tighter. He walked towards the doors.

"Bellamy what are you doing?" My voice was strangled as he walked out into the morning air. A shiver ran down my spine as I watched him stand with his back towards me. 

The baby stopped crying, I walked slowly towards him. Our child was in his arms, but this wasn't my husband. He wasn't scared or excited. He was the stoic shell of a man I had married. My hands shook as I tried to decide if I should reach out for him.

He turned to look at me as my hand touched his shoulder, "what has to be done.”

The baby dangled over the edge, terror filled my body. He was giggling as he hung upside down, his father only holding him by his foot. I screamed, the sound barely making it through my lips. A tear slipped down my cheek as he let go.

Our son fell, my scream ripped through the dream and out into the open. 

"Bellamy no!" I screamed his name as I sat up, sweat pooling around my waist. The blankets were twisted up around my legs, raven was the one holding my hand. She pushed my hair out of my face as I came back into reality. 

Raven sat up, "hey it's okay. You were dreaming," she let go of my hand and pressed another cool rag to my head, "the good news is your fever went down.”

I winced, "this isn't an illness," I whispered as I laid back down slowly, "this is the curse.”

My heart was in my throat as I remembered my moms warning. Dreams weren't to be ignored, they were important, they knew what was to come. Bellamy wouldn't kill me, he wouldn't kill our child. Would we even have a child? There were so many questions, the list was growing by the day. 

I shivered, covering my face with my hands. 

I was taken back to that night when I was almost strangled by the shadows. They were taunting me now, they were telling me that I might not die by their hands, but I would die by the curse. No I wouldn't die, someone I cared about would. That's what a curse does, it takes away your power. It takes away your ability to live, your will to love.

Somehow I had brought Bellamy back from that place. I watched him learn to open up, to believe in the good the world had to offer. I fought with him, I told him the truth. We had grown to love each other, we had grown into husband and wife. I couldn't lose him, I couldn't let the curse win. 

I still had no idea how to stop it.

My mind wandered back to the dream. My eyes went wide, a new thought entering my head. The dream, my moms warning. It all clicked into place. My stomach tightened and my heart fell. It couldn't be possible, we had only known each other for a month. Maybe a little more. I stopped keeping track of the days now that we actually cared about each other. I closed my eyes, I knew deep down if the curse was real than this was possible.

I felt sick all over again, my empty stomach trying to claw its way out of my body. I groaned as Octavia took Ravens place beside me, "hey Clarke, look at me.”

My eyes found my sisters, "you're still here.”

She laughed, "I was here when you fell asleep.”

My body had cooled down, "how long was I out for?”

"A few hours. It's almost past six.”

"Where's Bellamy?" My heart was racing. I knew I had sent him away, but now all I wanted was him back beside me. I wanted him holding my hand, I wanted him to tell me my fears weren't true.

Of course if they were I wanted him to tell me he was happy, that he was okay with what our future held.

I swallowed my fears, as Octavia sighed, "Bellamy is with Lincoln and Finn. They're uh, trying to break the curse.”

I closed my eyes, "but it's been hours. I just want to see him.”

Raven put her hand on her stomach. I felt my heart stop as I watched her bend forward, her small bump secured by her hand. Octavia squeezed my hand, forcing me to look back at her.

"I'll see if Miller can get him to come here. What's wrong? Raven said your fever went down. Aren't you feeling better?”

I nodded slowly, "yeah I feel better. I just, I have a terrible feeling," I was getting emotional, I never got emotional like this. I hated crying, when there wasn't a real reason to cry. I took in a breath, "I just need to see him.”

Octavia sat down as Raven walked towards the bedroom door. I laid back against the pillows, trying to slow my heart down. I was in Bellamy's room, which was comforting. My sister drew circles around my palm, "remember when I got really sick? The year after mom died.”

I nodded, "you were such a baby. Whining and moaning all night if I didn't rub your back.”

She laughed, "yeah. I hated being sick. But I remember you brought me soup every morning. You held my hand when I was cold then hot. You told me stories of the world, stories that took my mind off the pain," her eyes filled with tears, "you helped me more than any kind of medicine could.”

I rolled my eyes, "that's not true. You think that now because you're better and you don't need pain killers. But I'm sure they would've been nice when you were up all night with only my humming to help ease your aches.”

"Clarke you are an amazing big sister, the only one I would ever ask for. You came to this castle with your head held high, knowing how it would end for you. You're stronger than this illness or curse, whichever it may be. Everyone here loves you.”

I felt a tear fall down my cheek, "I'm so glad you're here Octavia," she kissed my forehead. It wasn't the same as when Bellamy did it, but it was filled with just as much love. I sighed, "I wish dad was too.”

I closed my eyes, exhausted once again. I wasn't ready to fall back asleep, the pain in my gut kicked back in. My eyes flew open, I had to see Bellamy. Something was wrong, my body was screaming at me to go find him. It was like we had somehow connected, like I knew he was choosing the wrong path before he stepped foot into it.

"Clarke you're shaking," Octavia's voice was filled with panic as my eyes shook. 

I couldn't stop the tremors that hit my body. I held onto her tightly, closing my eyes and willing myself to stop shaking. My heart slowed down, my body finally returned to me. Octavia looked nervous as we laid there in silence waiting for something to break.

Raven came back in the room when we realized I seemed to be better. She bit her lip, "Finn won't let Bellamy come to you. He said they're busy.”

I nodded, "something's wrong. I can feel it, I know something's wrong.”

Raven laughed slightly, sitting beside Octavia. She looked at my sister and then at me. She seemed amused by my pain which I didn’t find comforting, "Clarke remember when you came to the castle? You told me someone had to slay the dragon. Now look at you, you're connected.”

"What do you mean connected?" I sat up slowly, watching her lean back in her chair.

She pushed her hair over her shoulder, "it's rare. It only happens when two people truly love each other. Once they're together, they're hearts start to mirror each other. They know when the other is happy or sad. They know when they're in trouble.”

“Magic?"

She nodded, "it's light magic, the brightest magic I never thought would set foot into this castle. But if the curse is real, I believe this is too. Your heart has been linked with your husbands. True love seems to conquer all.”

I shook my head, "not everything. It hasn't broken the curse," I looked at the door, "Finn wouldn't let you in the room would he?”

She shook her head, "Lincoln was chanting something, Bellamy was quiet. He told me not to worry, but not to tell you.”

I pushed aside the covers, letting go of Octavia's hand. I started to stand up, the room spinning slightly. I closed my eyes, waiting for it to pass. When it did, I opened my eyes to find Octavia and Raven glaring at me.

"Get back in bed," my sister sounded like I did whenever she did something she shouldn't have. 

I shook my head, "no I need to find him. Octavia something is wrong, he's going to do something stupid. I have to stop him. Even if he's going to break the curse, I have to make sure he's safe.”

My sister was staring at me, contemplating whether or not she should fight me on this. I looked to Raven, she had to understand. I begged her with my eyes, both of them blocking my way to my closet. 

"You of all people should understand," Octavia raised an eyebrow, "you love Lincoln, you know in your soul you'd do anything to keep him safe. If you felt off about him, you would go to him. Please Octavia, I love him. He's my husband.”

Octavia stepped aside, letting me pass. I grabbed a new dress, slipping off the one I had gotten sick in. I pulled my hand up off my shoulders, my empty stomach had finally settled down. I stepped back around the changing curtain and then raven grabbed my hand. She pulled me into a hug, her little belly hitting mine.

"Congratulations," she whispered, squeezing my shoulder before she pulled away.

How she knew I had no idea. But I smiled at her, trying to believe it was a happy moment. I wouldn't believe it until the moment was shared with Bellamy. 

I looked at my sister. I could see in her brown eyes she understood, "go find your happiness.”

I hugged her tightly before I left the room. I knew I was fighting for him now. The curse wouldn't take me down, I had more to live for. Bellamy had more to live for.

There was a little seed nestled under my heart that needed more than just a mother. They needed a father too.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy finds a way to break the curse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE DON'T HATE ME!!!
> 
> I love this chapter. It's short but it gets the point across. I have two more chapters and then an epilogue. hopefully you won't revolt and stop reading after this one!
> 
> I love this story and all your suggestions, theories, and comments. Thanks for making my first fantasy story so much fun to write!!!

I searched the entire castle, at least the parts I knew. Raven didn't know where the boys were, they were moving from room to room. I went to the kitchen, my bedroom, the gardens. Every room I entered was empty, every step I took my heart fell a little further. I needed to find them, I needed to stop the nagging that was happening inside my heart.

If we were really connect as Raven claimed then something terrible was about to happen. The pain in my gut wasn't the same pain I had felt earlier. It screamed at me to find Bellamy. My heart beat erratically like it was waiting for the moment it all came crashing down. 

I picked up my pace and went to the last place I thought they might be.

I found them on the balcony. Lincoln and Finn were staring at each other, Bellamy was kneeling on the ground with his white shirt open. His chest was glistening with sweat, the sword was positioned in front of him. There was an old gray rope wrapped around his neck. I don't know how but I knew that rope had once been Roma's, it held her when she died. 

It took me a few seconds to piece it together. This wasn't the easy way out, this wasn't going to save both of us. I gasped when I saw his eyes closed. He was wincing, he was in pain as he knelt there, the room filled with tension.

Lincoln watched as Bellamy's shoulders slipped, his body was screaming in pain. He held the sharp part of the sword, it cut into the palm of his hand. Blood dripped down the metal, it glistened in the moonlight. I heard thunder, Finn looked as uneasy as I felt about this whole scene.

Finns eyes came to mine, he stopped, his mouth falling open. I stepped forward, I was going to break the circle. He shook his head, tears filled my eyes as he told me to stay back without speaking out loud. I couldn't just stand there and let this happen. 

We were supposed to break the curse together. 

"Bellamy," his name was soft coming off my lips as lightening struck the center of the circle. He screamed out in pain. I screamed as he fell over, Lincoln nodding his head. Finn looked at me as I ran to my husband.

I grabbed his shoulders before he hit the ground. I pulled his head into my lap, I couldn't feel him breathing. I couldn't find his heartbeat, that's when my heart stopped. I pulled the noose off of his neck, the rope was now black and burned against my skin. I dropped it as soon as I touched it, the rope fell apart as it hit the ground. I ran my hand down his cheek, trying and failing to bring him back to me.

The circle was broken, the sword had fallen down beside me. His blood dripped onto the concrete, his face lifeless. His eyes were closed, his heart was still. He was gone in every sense of the word and yet I couldn't believe it was true. 

"No," I cried looking up at Finn, "no please he can't be gone.”

Lincoln took a step towards me, "Clarke. This is what he wanted. He wanted to save you and his kingdom. He finally found a purpose bigger than himself.”

I shook my head, "no this wasn't supposed to happen. You were supposed to save us, not kill him.”

I had never felt hatred before Harper was taken away. I felt that same angry ball of emotion push its way up my throat. I hated Lincoln for coming here, for telling us he could help when all he did was ruin what we had. I hated Bellamy for choosing the cowards way out, for sacrificing himself when he wouldn't agree to let me consider the same. 

Through the hatred I felt grief. My husband, the man who was becoming more of a friend than a stranger every single day, was gone. I didn't get to hear him say goodbye, or make him laugh when his stupid corny jokes. I swallowed my pride, the emotions building up. They were ready to fall. 

I couldn't let him go. Finn broke the silence, "Clarke he wanted me to tell you he was sorry. I wanted to find you, he said it would be easier this way.”

The entire time I had been at this castle Bellamy had been strong. He was the king, he was the keeper of the kingdom. Now he laid there in my arms like he had never existed, like his life wasn't even worth remembering. It wasn't fair, he had been born into a castle full of secrets, a life he never asked for. 

"He should be here, he deserved happiness. He deserved forgiveness.”

Lincoln closed his eyes, "Clarke I'm sorry.”

I shook my head, looking away from the boy I had known for so long now. I thought he was a brother to me, I thought he would find a way to save us from ourselves. Instead he had been the only one in this castle to find a way to finish what I had started. He had killed the king without laying a single hand on him.

If my heart wasn't in pieces, if this had been before our nights together, I might have been impressed. Now I was left alone with the knowledge of his child and the fact that I would have to find a way to tell them how and why their father would never get to see them. 

I didn't want that burden. I didn't want this life without Bellamy.

A tear slipped down my cheek, landing on his. He looked so peaceful, finding the sleep he hadn't gotten in months. I clung to him, I held him tightly trying to put him back together. I didn't want this life without him. I didn't want to be here in this castle without Bellamy. 

I held him tightly, my tears hitting his skin. He was still warm, but he wasn't moving. Lincoln watched as I fell apart, stopping Finn from coming towards me. I saw the shake of his head, something was going on behind his brown eyes. He knew something I didn’t.

"Lincoln please stop whatever you started, change it, reverse it please," I sobbed, "Bellamy please wake up. Come back to me, you didn't even say goodbye.”

The room felt smaller, the sky felt darker. My heart broke when I lost my cousin, but now it was fractured beyond repair losing Bellamy. He was half my heart, I didn't realize it until now. I had given him the pieces, he had put them back together. I didn't want to lose him. I gasped for air, wishing I could trade places with him.

"You promised," my voice broke as the two men watched me mourn the love of my life, "you promised I wouldn't lose you.”

The dreams, the shadows, nothing was as suffocating as this moment. I felt like I was caught up in a nightmare. I closed my eyes, trying with all my might to bring him back. If I woke up and felt his arms around me. If he was there smiling that lazy smile he had given me this morning, maybe the curse would be bearable.

If we were connected, I should've felt peace. There was peace on his face, his restless nights were over. He wouldn't see the brides who died, he wouldn't feel the weight of his sins on his shoulder. I didn't feel peace, my heart was at war with my head. I knew the truth, I held it in my arms. But my heart refused to take a single answer. 

I was begging for something that wasn't possible. I was still wishing for a life I knew would never happen.

I knew it was no use. No magic, no curse could bring the man I loved back from the grave. He had made his choice and now I had to live with the consequences. He could rest easy now, he was at peace with his sins, with his choices. I would spend the rest of my life trying to clean his name.

Bellamy Blake would be remembered for more than the mass murders he committed. He was a king who should've been loved, not feared.

I ran my hand down his cheek, my heart breaking as I let him go. He wasn't coming back, there was nothing I could do to change that. I leaned down and kissed him, my lips gentle against his forehead. I never thought I would come to love this man, but I loved him so much my heart shattered as I imagined the life I would now have to face without him.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke faces the aftermath of Bellamy breaking the curse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HERE IT IS!!! I feel like it's been torture enough waiting for me to be confident in this chapter. So I'll post it now before I go on vacation. 
> 
> This isn't the end! I have two more chapters they both wrap the story up! thanks for the love and the comments. I loved taking this journey with you all =)

The boys couldn't move me from the spot inside the circle. There were no guards in the room, no one else knew the king was dead but the three of us. My chest was on fire, I didn't even want to tell my sister or Raven. I didn't want to move, I just wanted to hold him in my arms until he was back here with me. I wanted to wake up from this nightmare. None of us moved, no one went to tell anyone. We all stayed quiet, mourning the beautiful man that was Bellamy. Another tear fell down my cheek, there were few people who truly loved him.

Finn was the only one trying to get me to move. Out of the two of them he seemed like the only one to care what had happened. Lincoln just kept staring, like he was waiting for something to happen. His eyes were dark, his arms crossed over his chest. He was always a quiet man, but now he stood stoically, holding his breath as I cried for the man I barely got to know. Finn was trying to hide his own tears as I held my love in my arms. I knew I was walking on thin ice, but I couldn’t leave my king there alone while he left this earth. Someone should hold his hand, he had been doing this alone for far too long now.

Lincoln didn't seem to be in any hurry, he stood watching me, nodding his head every once in a while as I murmured to the king’s empty skin. His lips moved as he murmured something, my own heart break was too loud for me to figure out what he was saying. He had a secret, he was letting me bide my time for a reason. 

Finn closed his eyes, he was letting himself mourn for his cousin. I didn't think to comfort him, I was too caught up in my own grief. Lincoln kept watching, his dark eyes bright in the moonlight. The world outside around us seemed peaceful. The sky was dark outside the window, but I could see every single star perfectly. 

Maybe Bellamy was finally happy, up there with all his stars, watching down at the kingdom he had left behind. 

I thought back all those years, watching my mother die in her bed. I thought that had been hard, I thought watching her wither away to nothing was the worst thing that would ever happen to me. I can still remember her skin as cold as ice as she held my hand, telling me I had to watch over Octavia now. Even through my tears and her illness she was beautiful. I stayed strong for her, I promised to watch my sister, to take care of my dad. It was easy to say the words when she was depending on me.

Watching her take in her last breath was hard, but it was nothing compared to the ache inside my chest as I held my husband in my arms. My husband who was no longer breathing, my husband was as still as a statue.

We had known each other for long enough to know that there was nothing I wouldn’t do to trade places with him. We had met under circumstances that weren’t ideal, but we had made each other happy. Somewhere along the journey to what I thought was revenge and justice I found a second path, one that brought me to Bellamy and his beautiful smile. I pulled him out of the darkness and reminded him of the light we could live under.

I wish I had gotten here sooner. Maybe I could’ve saved his life if I had tried just a little harder.

I closed my eyes, praying to whoever was up there that he was safe and finally at peace. I prayed that my mom found him and told him that everything that had happened between us was real. I wanted him to know no matter what he thought everything I said, everything I gave him was the truth. He had to know I loved him, I loved him with every single piece of my heart.

I opened my eyes, tears staining my cheeks as I tried to stop the pain, “I love you Bellamy Blake,” my voice caught, “no matter how stubborn or rude you could be. I loved you, I didn’t care what anyone else said.”

A tear fell down Finn’s cheek, I wondered if he was caught up in his own memories of the boy who was his cousin first, his king second. I knew if the roles were reversed Bellamy would be angry, he would be demanding a way to reverse this, to put the spell back into order. He would do anything to save me, but he wouldn’t let me do the same for him. His life ended the way it started, he sacrificed himself for the people who truly cared about.

If only he would have let someone do that for him.

I sighed, I didn't want to be queen without a king. No, I didn’t want to be a queen without Bellamy as my king. A sob escaped my throat as his curls fell into his eyes. We had been joking about giving him a haircut last night. It hurt to remember how happy we had been. We had a moment of happiness before the castle and the curse took it away.

I pressed my face against his, the lightening striking the room once more. The entire room lit up like the sun was outside the window, the curtains blew out, the thunder sounded loudly outside the glass. My tears stained his cheeks as I felt it happen. 

Finn let out a loud curse, his hand stopped mid air as the darkness fell once more and I stayed still. My arms were still wrapped around his shoulders, I wouldn’t let them take him from me yet. I needed one more minute, I would be here this time. My blood ran faster, my heart skipped a beat. Bellamy’s skin was still warm, I looked down at his face. Lincoln smiled as it all fell into place. 

My hand fell against his chest. He gasped. Then his heart started to beat once more.

"Clarke," his voice was soft, I jumped back. His eyes were still closed. He closed his mouth loudly and then opened his eyes to look at me. His brown eyes were lighter, the dark circles underneath were gone. His deep voice was broken, "you saved me.”

Lincoln smiled at us. I was so stunned I couldn't find my voice. My eyes were wide as I waited for this dream, vision, whatever it was to disappear. I had to be dreaming, this couldn’t be real. The dead didn’t just come back to life before you eyes. I pinched myself, nothing happened. But he was alive, his eyes were open and he was breathing again. I felt tears of joy gather in my eyes.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. I didn’t waste one moment, feeling his hair tangle between my fingers. He laughed as I pulled away, it was the best sound I had ever heard. His arms were wrapped tightly around my waist, “Bellamy. You're alive.” 

Lincoln cleared his throat and we jumped apart. Bellamy didn’t let me go, he pulled me closer into his chest as Lincoln walked towards us, "it was a test. Because she's fallen in love with you, because you sacrificed your life for the lives of the hundred women you were to kill, the balance has been restored.”

I watched as he nodded his head, “thank you Lincoln.” 

The tan boy smiled, his nod the only encouragement he gave, “you get one second chance Bellamy Blake. Make sure you use it wisely.”

His eyes found mine as Lincoln’s voice cut off. The tension left his shoulders the moment he smiled. I was his second chance, there was no way I was letting him go this time.

I slapped his shoulder hard, the grief I felt earlier had given way to anger now that he was back with me, "don't ever scare me like that again.”

"I'm sorry," he whispered running his hand across mine. He sat up slowly, his eyes going around the room. Something was different about him. He looked lighter, like the weight was finally off his shoulder.

Bellamy's smile was slow as we sat there together, Finn watching us as he put his hands on my cheeks. He kissed me softly, my heart racing as his cousin and Lincoln watched us together.

"I thought I lost you," my voice was weak as I fought off tears. Bellamy's hand was warm and strong, holding mine tightly.

He shook his head, "you'll never lose me.”

I laughed, his lips close to mine, “you promised me we would do this together,” he ran his thumb across my bottom lip, “which means no one sacrifices for the other. We take on whatever comes next together.”

He nudged me with his shoulder, “yes, my queen.”

I shook my head and we stood up together. I held onto my husband refusing to ever let him go. He took in a breath, I realized the sky outside was getting darker, "we saved the kingdom."

I laughed as he kept staring at me. It was like he had been reborn, his smile crooked, “I can’t believe it, but we did. But I didn’t want this kingdom without you. I’m serious Bell, please don't do that to me again.”

His brown eyes were bright as we stood together, my hands pressed against his chest. He sighed, leaning into me as he spoke slowly, “before Lincoln gave me this option, the one with less chance of staying here with you, we found a different one," his eyes sparkled, "I am to fall in love with someone with no royal blood in their veins," his arms tightened around me, "and have a child produced from that love. Roma's father left that part out because he wanted the kingdom to hate me. He didn't want me to have a choice in saving it.”

Blood fell to the ground, "Bellamy you're still bleeding. Let me see your hands.”

He sighed, keeping his arms around my waist. I rolled my eyes as he ignored me, "yes. As you saw Lincoln's other option, which broke both curses on the kingdom, involved a little more than just true love," he smiled as he ran his uninjured hand down my cheek, "I sacrificed myself for you.”

I looked at him confused, "you wouldn't let me sacrifice myself for you," I whispered feeling a tug on my heart, "you know I wouldn't have asked you to do it either.”

He shook his head, "I know but I can't live without you. You can live without me. I did what I had to do for this kingdom, for you. I love you Clarke Blake," I smiled when he used my married last name, "and I will spend every moment of our life together proving it to you. A promise is a promise, I intend to keep this one.”

I leaned in and kissed him, the rain falling against the glass. My heart was racing as I pulled away and saw the love in his eyes, "well it's a good thing you love me, and that somehow you came back to me. I can live without you, but I don't want to," I whispered my forehead pressed against his, "neither can our baby.”

The room fell silent except for Finn's small gasp. Bellamy looked up at me confused, his forehead wrinkled as his deep voice went up an octave, "a baby?”

I smiled, a tear slipping down my cheek as he processed the information, "I'm pregnant.”

The smile that spread across his face was bigger than any I had ever seen. I laughed as relief washed over me. He was happy to become a father. Bellamy hugged me tightly, picking me up and spinning me around. I kissed him, the rain outside was the answer to our prayers. The kingdom would be saved, the curse was broken. I thought I had lost him, but by some miracle I had been wrong. He was still here with me.

He set me down, "I told you if what you need is forgiveness I would give it to you,” my voice broke as I put my hand against his cheek, "I love you, Bellamy. You sacrificed yourself for me. You gave up your life for the girls you never knew. Now we can save our people.”

A tear fell down his cheek, "I love you, both of you," his hand resting against my flat stomach, "so much it hurts.”

I kissed him again, knowing no matter what had happened in our past, this man was my future. He was my husband, the only one I wanted to wake up beside. I couldn't wait to meet our baby and live happily ever after.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pre Epilogue that gives you a glimpse into the castle post-curse.
> 
> Bellamy and Clarke are going strong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was originally going to be the end, but I have another little scene I want to play out. So this is the epilogue before the epilogue. I hope you enjoy. The ending will have to wait until I get back from vacation =)

When the sky finally opened up and the rain fell we knew the curse was broken. The kingdom rejoiced at the rain, Bellamy and I smiled. He took my hand and we knew our futures were set. We were a family, I loved him and he loved me. It might not have been a perfect start, but it would be one hell of a happily ever after.

The day after the doctors checked me and confirmed I was indeed carrying his child, Bellamy decided to release a statement to his kingdom. He stood out at the gates, everyone gathered to see the king. It was the first statement he had ever given. I stood beside him, holding his hand and smiling for the world to see. We were happy, there was nothing more to fear.

"My people I would first like to apologize for what you have been through these last few years. I never wanted to harm you, or cause you pain. I only wanted to be the king you needed," he paused as a few people scoffed, "I cannot bring your daughters back, but I can offer you the promise that it will never happen again.”

I squeezed his fingers gently, the crowd staring at me. I stepped up as Bellamy fumbled with the paper in front of him, "I know you all think it's my fault. You look at me with anger because I am not your daughter. She didn't get to live and I did. You think we don't deserve to happy. That's true, but if I am able to forgive the man who murdered my cousin, then I believe you are capable of it too.”

Bellamy smiled at me, "the drought is over, the curse has been broken," he was a different man. I could only hope the kingdom could see that too, "and I am happy to tell you all that soon we will have a little heir running around the kingdom.”

A few people cheered, Raven shook her head on my right, her own stomach bigger than mine. I couldn't wait for our babies to grow up as best friends. She had been pretty happy when I told her about about the heir. I’m so glad to have found a friend as beautiful and real as her inside this castle. 

Bellamy finished his speech and then Finn stepped up. He wore a ring on his left hand. The same as Raven, his wife.

Their wedding was beautiful. I was her maid of honor, Bellamy was his best man. Neither one of them could stop smiling like kids on Christmas morning as the preacher said you may kiss the bride. I shed a tear at how much they loved each other. 

Bellamy watched me throughout their vows. He smiled, his eyes told me that he remembered our wedding better than all the others. He said he couldn’t stop staring at the girl who had volunteered to die. He knew the moment he took my hand that day he had to try harder with me. I couldn't believe the life we had made together. I never thought I would fall in someone like him, but I did.

We spent our days together, his duties were less now that the spell was broken. He told me I was more important than clauses and paperwork. Miller had been taking on some duties while Finn took care of Raven.

As happy as we were, there were still nights when Bellamy's nerves got the best of him.

I woke up and the bed was empty. For a second I forgot that the castle wasn't cursed. I got scared, visions of Bellamy dying came flashing back. I sat up quickly, looking around the room. It was dark, he wasn't there. But the doors that led to our small balcony were open. The breeze hit me as I pushed my legs over the edge of the bed.

He had his back towards me, his shoulders were stiff. He was still shirtless, which made me feel like a giddy teenager. I loved when he slept without a shirt. He would wrap me up in his arms, pressing my back against his warm chest and the world stopped turning.

Of course I loved falling asleep in his shirt even more.

I sighed as I walked forward and wrapped my arms around him from behind, "come back to bed.”

His smile was slow as I kissed his shoulder. He was always so warm. Bellamy turned to look at me, his face was full of worry and fear, "I just needed a moment.”

"What's wrong?" I asked running my hand through his hair. I could tell something was bothering him.

He sighed slowly, his eyes going towards my growing stomach. He shook his head, "I just, I don't know how to be a father. My own father was terrible, and I'm terrified I'm going to screw them up. What if I do? What if they hate me or worse—"

I pressed my lips to his silencing his fears. I felt him wrap his arms around my waist, holding me close as I eased his worries, "you are going to be the best dad there is. They will love you just as much as I do.”

He sighed, "I'm sorry I'm such a mess," he whispered as he pressed our foreheads together, "I just didn't realize this would all happen so quickly. Raven is due any day now and Finn’s freaking out.”

I laughed, but then stopped. Because as he spoke, his deep voice hit something. As I stood there I felt the little tiny movement inside my stomach. It was like it had filled with butterflies and suddenly they were trying to get out. My eyes went wide and I went still in my husbands arms. 

"Bellamy," I took his hand off my waist.

He looked ready to pass out, "what's wrong?”

I laughed, "the baby just kicked," I laid his palm flat against my stomach, "keep talking. They did it when you were talking.”

He blew out a breath, "hey baby. I know you can hear how scared I am. Don't worry, I will get over it and be the best dad you've ever —"

His eyes went wide, the baby kicked again. This time it was hard and fast, two little hits to my stomach. I laughed as Bellamy's nerves went away, his smile spreading slowly. 

"See they already love you," I whispered, pressing my lips to his, "now come back to bed. Baby and I are tired. We want you to tell us another story.”

He followed me back into the room and closed the doors behind us. I curled up under the covers as he laid his hand on my stomach once more. He started to tell us a story of the first castle. Bellamy loved history, he loved to tell a story of the time before now. I was still learning things about my husband but this was my favorite one.

I closed my eyes, the baby's tiny feet still going as their father spoke slowly, his voice soothing to both of us. Before I fell back asleep I felt him kiss my stomach, and promise to always love them and their mother. I smiled, I knew he was still afraid the curse wasn't broken, that he would be driven mad and kill me.

I knew it was broken. Because every time I looked into his beautiful brown eyes all I could see was the love he had finally found with me. 

My stomach expanded overnight. I was five months pregnant when it finally made an appearance. I woke up and I couldn't see my feet. Bellamy was laughing as his had laid flat against our baby. He kissed my belly, the stubble scratching my skin.

"There's a baby in there," he whispered as he kept staring at me. I laughed, he baby's foot kicking out, "I can't believe it.”

I picked up his hand and pressed it against the bottom of my stomach. No matter how many times he felt them kick, his eyes went wide every single time. I smiled, "the baby we made together.”

He pressed his lips against my wrist and then pulled himself up. His hand touched my stomach as he kissed me softly. My heart swelled with love as he held us both in his arms.

"Are you happy?" I asked quietly as I ran my hand down his cheek.

He laughed that deep beautiful sound I fell in love with, "I am more than happy, Clarke. I love you," he pressed his lips to mine again, "are you happy?”

I nodded, my hands running over my stomach. The baby kicked once more, "I love you too.”

As my stomach got bigger and the days got longer Bellamy started to lessen his load even more. Finn was busy with his new baby, so Bellamy appointed Miller to become his second. He asked for his help on duties outside the kingdom. He didn't want to leave me alone. I loved how much he cared, but I knew I would be fine if he continued to work.

Between the swollen feet, the aches in my back, and constantly wanting to jump my husband, being pregnant was harder than I thought. Watching my mom carry Octavia made it look easy. She kept working, she kept laughing. I was exhausted by mid afternoon, Bellamy always laid with me while I took a nap.

Bellamy fell in love with his nephew fast. When he wasn’t with me he was with Finn holding the little boy, bouncing him lightly in his arms. He claimed he needed practice, but I knew he really loved that baby. I knew he was scared of becoming a father and he wanted the reassurance that he was doing okay with someone else’s child.

I watched them together whenever we were all in the same room. I could see it in his eyes, he wanted a son. It was easy to tell, his eyes lit up whenever Adam grabbed his finger and giggle at his deep voice. He would sing the boy a song and everyone melted at the beautiful scene in front of them. I could only hope he fell as in love with our child as he was with Raven’s.

I didn’t care the sex of our baby as long as they were happy and healthy. I would love a boy or girl all the same. Of course I liked to imagine watching Bellamy bounce a little girl on his knee. I would dream of him kissing her bruises, pushing her long hair behind her ear, scaring away the boys who wanted to date her. Deep down I wasn’t ready to admit it, but I wanted a little girl.

I wanted to watch Bellamy a raise a daughter.

Finn and Bellamy were dealing with one of the guards on the afternoon it happened. The boys had figured out who helped Murphy with attacking me and much to Bellamy’s dismay, they had to deal with it. He hated when business pulled him away from me, but I always told him that I would be right here waiting. He kissed my stomach and went on his way, promising that the business would never keep him from coming home.

Raven brought little Adam to my room, we passed the time together a lot these days. We were the best of friends, she wasn’t my hand maiden anymore. 

She walked through the door holding her baby against her chest. He was almost a month old and she had already lost the baby weight. I needed to know her secret. I was due soon and I was dreading the baby weight that would stick around after the baby was born.

I clapped my hands together, excited for both of them to visit with me. She placed him in my arms, “hey buddy,” he had a head full of thick black hair, “you’re so big!”

She laughed, “and heavy. I think all he does is drink his weight in milk these days,” she sighed as she crawled into Bellamy’s side of the best beside me.

I ran my finger down his cheek, his little eyes closed, “you and your cousin are going to be best friends. Just like your mommy and me.”

Raven laughed as she leaned back against the headboard, “yes they are. So how are you doing today? Bell said you’re still tired.”

I sighed, “I’m not as tired as yesterday, but hopefully that doesn’t pass. Maybe that’s because my two favorite people are visiting me,” I smiled down at the little baby, “but enough about me, how has it been adjusting?”

Raven blushed, “I should’ve told Finn the truth a long time ago. Between the baby and his work I hardly get to see him. But when we are together we can’t keep our hands off each other.”

I laughed, my baby kicking at my stomach. Adam’s eyes opened at the movement beneath him, “I know what that’s like. Even with my enormous belly Bellamy still looks at me like I’m the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.”

She ran her hand over her son’s hair. She had so much love in her eyes for that little boy. I couldn’t believe I would be in her shoes soon. I would be falling in love with my baby the way she had already fallen for hers. The baby Bellamy and I had created. I still couldn’t believe it was real, this future we never thought was possible.

“You saved him Clarke,” Raven looked up at me smiling, “I don’t know how, but you did. Because of you the kingdom was saved too.”

I smiled, thinking about how he had saved me. We had saved each other in more ways than one. I knew we would never be able to repay the other. It was a silent agreement that we knew we were more than lucky to be given this second chance at happiness, this second chance at life.

Adam started to fuss as a pain ripped through my stomach, “hey, can you uh, can you take him back?”

I felt the blood drain from my face as I let out a slow breath. The pain didn’t live, it ripped through my body and I felt my arms go weak. I fought off tears, biting my lip as hard as I could to stop the scream that was building in my throat. 

“Clarke, hey what’s wrong?” Raven looked worried as I closed my eyes.

“I think the baby is coming,” I swung my legs over the side of the bed, “find Lincoln and Bellamy, please.”

I whimpered, the last word more of a plea than a polite request. I stood up, my stomach felt way too heavy as I laid a hand against it. I gasped just as my water broke, spilling all over the floor as I cried out in pain. I couldn’t handle it anymore, it was too much to keep the screams inside.

“Octavia!” Raven yelled for my sister as she walked towards the door. Adam was crying when my sister’s face appeared.

I was bend over, holding my belly. Her cheerful voice made this all seem like a dream I couldn’t wake up from, “hey what’s up—” she stopped when she saw me,  “oh. Lincoln! Get in here! I’ll take Adam.”

Raven handed Octavia her son as Lincoln came to my side. He took my arm as Raven held onto the other. We had had this plan set before my stomach extended over my feet. Still there was something, no someone missing. We had never really thought Bellamy would be working when this happened. He was always at my side, we just assumed he would be there when the baby came.

Now he wasn’t and I needed him.

“Bellamy,” I looked at Octavia. She was a natural with Adam, “get Bell, please.”

I wanted my husband now more than anyone else. We had gotten into this situation together. We were going to get through it the same way. My sister nodded her head, watching as we passed her on our way out the door. She went in the opposite direction, towards Bellamy’s office. We turned to the left, going towards the balcony.

We had set up a make shift medical area for both Raven and me. The bed was clean, the room away from everyone else. Hopefully they wouldn’t hear my screams. I didn’t want everyone else to know I was having the baby until after it was over.

Raven and Lincoln sat me down on the bed slowly, “breathe, Clarke. Big deep breaths, you can do this. After all this pain you’re going to have a beautiful baby. A little baby Bellarke.”

I laughed at the name the guards had given us. They claimed we were a team and we needed a name that was strong. They decided we were royalty so they combined our names to make us into one strong person. Raven and Finn had taken to using it once it got around. Usually it was a joke, but soon it became a nickname for the two of us. 

I gritted my teeth, “get the midwife,” I squeezed Raven’s hand, “I want this baby out.”

It hurt more than I anticipated, I tried the breathing but it wasn’t working. It wasn’t doing shit to ease the pain that was tearing at my stomach. I looked at Raven as she stood there, she was the only one who understood how I felt, “tell Bellamy if he’s not here I’ll kill him myself.”

Lincoln laughed as another contraction washed over me. He held my hand as I fought off tears and then the door opened, “Clarke,” his deep voice chased away the pain. The moment his lips grazed my forehead I relaxed just a little bit. 

I smiled, “it’s happening, Bell. We’re going to be parents.”

He laced his fingers through mine, “I know, sweetheart,” he pressed his lips against my forehead and I closed my eyes as he sighed, “I can’t wait to meet our baby.”

 

—-

 

Bellamy was in awe a Raven took our baby from the midwife. His jaw hung open, his eyes glazed with tears. I smiled as he kissed me, both our hearts bursting with love for our child. He kept my hand in his, squeezing it gently as he leaned down and pressed a kiss to my lips. Our lives had changed the day we married, we just never knew this was the change we had been waiting for.

“It’s a girl,” Raven laughed as she swaddled her in a blanket and placed her in my arms.

“I don’t know anything about girls,” Bell’s voice was low as we looked down at her beautiful little face. She had his dark curls, that hair had given me heartburn for months. His freckles lined her nose, brushing up towards her eyes. The only feature that told me she was my little girl were the blue eyes that were staring back at me.

I watched her tiny fingers reached for his, smiling as they wrapped around his big warm finger, “I think you did pretty good with me.”

Bellamy laughed, his daughter yawning in my arms, “she’s so tiny. She’s so beautiful,” he sighed, his voice getting lower as he spoke quietly, “like her mother.”

I shook my head, “and she’s all ours.”

Bellamy couldn’t seem to grasp the fact that we had created this life together. Somehow we had been given the future we never thought was possible. I would be forever grateful to the man upstairs, or the woman, who watching over us. I had a feeling there were two women involved, making sure both their children were looked after.

Lincoln had been right, we had been so lucky to be offered a second chance. I was lucky to have Bellamy here beside me. I would never stop thanking the world around us for letting both of us finally be happy.

“Here take her,” I handed our daughter to her father, smiling as his arms went stiff. He held Adam so many times, but now his confidence was shattered. He was nervous as he took her and cradled her against his chest. She cooed, reaching for his finger once more as he swayed slightly with her in his arms. I leaned back against the pillow, exhausted, but happy.

Raven and Octavia were smiling as they came back into the room and watched our family moment. Octavia had come in the moment the cord was cut. She smiled as she looked at me, the sweat matting my hair to my forehead, “so does she have a name yet?”

I looked at my sister, my heart stalling as I nodded, “meet your niece, Aurora Abigail Blake.”

Bellamy stopped fawning over her. His brown eyes went wide as his body stilled, he was staring at me. There was a smile playing on the corner of his lips, but I could see the emotion inside his eyes. I could see he was trying to decide what emotion to play out as I looked back at him. 

He swallowed and then finally let his smile pass, “really?”

He had told me one night while taking a break from story time how much he missed his mom. I knew right then that if we had a daughter, that would be her name. I nodded slowly as Octavia stood beside him, looking down at her niece.

“I mean if that’s okay with you. I just believe both of our mother’s will always be with us,” Octavia took the baby. Bellamy sat down on the edge of the bed beside me, “they helped us become who we are. They deserved to be remembered for raising strong children. For helping us find each other.”

A tear slipped down his cheek as he leaned in and kissed me. My sister held our baby in her arms as I felt the world turn in the right direction. Everyone was happy, everyone was healthy. I loved my husband and he loved me. We were finally a family, complete with no curses or strings attached to the castle.

Bellamy squeezed my hand as our eyes met, “I love you my queen.”

I leaned my head against his shoulder. When I closed my eyes I still saw by family, happy and smiling down at the newest addition, “as I love you my king.”

It was crazy to realize none of this would’ve happened if everyone knew the truth. I never would’ve found Bellamy if the curse hadn’t been in place. In a way Roma’s curse had been a blessing, if not a saving grace. Our love was stronger than magic, it was stronger than everyone who was against us.

I smiled as Bellamy held me against his side. I never knew this level of happiness was possible, but here I was happier than I had ever been.

No one thought it was possible, but the monster never lived in the kingdom. The monster was never real, everyone was just too scared to find out the truth. I wasn’t like everyone else, I had pushed my way into this world. I thought I would take down the dragon. But there was no need to slay a dragon that didn't exist in the first place.


	22. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time has passed and the kingdom has healed. Bellamy and Clarke are happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS! i love this epilogue i love it so much. I love happy bellarke and I love all of you for loving my story! thanks so much for making this so easy to write with your feedback =)

**Three years later.**

 

The kingdom thrived under Bellamy's rule. Aurora grew too fast, her brother came along a year after she did. Jax was my mirror, his blonde curls always falling into his blue eyes. Bellamy couldn't believe how beautiful they both were. Aurora was his baby, she was a daddy's girl. 

I loved watching them together. They were two peas in a pod, learning the whole parenting thing together. He was hesitant at first, but the first time he made her laugh all his nerves were eased. They were adorable, I couldn't stop watching as they grew together.

"Look, mommy," his voice broke through my thoughts as I came into the living room. I had just put the baby down, I was ready for bed myself. 

"Mommy!" She ran towards me and tackled me as I fell onto the couch.

I nuzzled her nose as she giggled, "my baby," I kissed her cheek as she hugged me.

"Daddy's teaching me to dance," she was so excited as she jumped back up.

I smiled, her little feet fit perfectly on top of her dad’s. She placed her tiny hands inside his and he spun her around. It was a beautiful sight, watching a father dance with his daughter. I knew it would be even more beautiful when she wore her gown. She even talked her father into getting her a crown. 

Like I said he was wrapped around her little finger.

I clapped when they finished, "brava," Aurora jumped into my arms as Bellamy fell down beside me on the couch, "your first dance will be perfect.”

Bellamy leaned in and kissed my cheek, "almost as perfect as ours.”

The ball was scheduled for tomorrow. We never let the public into the castle before. We had been too busy with the baby or the kingdom. Now that Jax was here and aurora was three we decided it was time for the walls to give. We were going to let our people see how happy we were, how happy they should be. 

I leaned into his shoulder, lacing my fingers through his, "I can't wait for my father to get here.”

My dad had yet to meet his grandchildren. Octavia went to visit him after the curse was broken. I stayed behind, too tired and pregnant to make the journey. When she came back she brought presents for the baby and a kiss for me. I missed him, he didn't have the means to make the trip here himself.

Bellamy had sent one of the guards out to get him for the ceremony. He knew about much I wanted him here for their first ball. I wanted him to meet his grandson, to hear Aurora’s beautiful laugh. I wanted him to finally meet the husband I sent him letters about, to shake the hand of the man who had sacrificed himself for me. 

I wanted him to see the love we shared, to know I was happy and healthy here in the castle. 

"Time for bed," I tapped the little knee next to mine as she groaned, "I bet if you ask real nicely, daddy will read you a story.”

She perked up, "the one about the three headed dog? Or what about the girl who fell in love with the stars?”

My daughter had gotten her love for history from her father. He told her endless stories throughout her childhood, they bonded over mythology and history. I loved how nerdy they were about it. I smiled as Bellamy scooped her up and carried her up the steps.

I closed my eyes, tired from a long day, content with the quiet around me. I felt the cushions slump beside me, I sighed. Always interrupted in this big castle.

"Clarke," Octavia poked my shoulder. I opened my eyes and glared at my little sister. She waved her fingers at me, "he finally asked.”

I sat up, no longer annoyed as I grabbed her left hand. She laughed as I gasped, her ring was beautiful. I shook my head, "Octavia," my sister had been waiting half her life for Lincoln to propose. I couldn't stop smiling.

She laughed, wiping away a tear, "he just got down on one knee and told me he wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. I can't wait to tell dad.”

I hugged her tightly, "I'm so happy for you.”

Octavia was staring down at her ring, so eager to marry the man who's been there through everything. He was there for me, the brother I never had, "he's pretty perfect huh?”

I laughed, "yeah, only second to my husband.”

She shook her head, "we got lucky.”

"Now you can give Aurora and Jax some cousins to play with. I mean Adam can only handle so much of that girl.”

She laughed, "no rushing it," she was blushing, "but I can't wait to have some baby Lincoln’s."

My sister was so happy, so in love. I couldn't stop smiling for her.

It was bittersweet to realize we owed all our happiness to the cousin we would never get to thank for bringing us here to the castle. I closed my eyes, praying that Harper was at peace and somehow understood the circumstances that lead me to falling in love with Bellamy. I was hoping she forgave me and that she was watching out for Wells.

I found my way to our room after Bellamy put Aurora to sleep for the night. I saw her nightlight shining as I passed by her bedroom and I smiled. Bellamy was a good father, one of the best if you asked me. He loved that little girl with a fierceness that ran this kingdom. He loved that little girl as much as he loved me.

I shut our bedroom door behind me and found Bellamy standing on the balcony looking out at the night. His shoulders were stiff, his arms were crossed in front of his chest, he had his back towards me. I walked quietly towards him, breathing in the night’s air. Ever since the curse was broken the kingdom had beautiful weather year round. We were lucky to have found such a beautiful place to call home.

Once I was behind him I wrapped my arms around his waist, pulling him close to me. I closed my eyes, taking in the moment. We rarely had a alone time these days between the kingdom, Aurora, and Jax constantly needing our attention, we were lucky to fall asleep in the same room. Still I wouldn’t trade either of my children for the world. That didn’t mean I didn’t miss my husband. I wanted him even when we were in the same room together.

I pressed a kiss against his shoulder as I let out a slow breath and opened my eyes, “I love you my king.”

He gave me a small, deep laugh, “I love you,” he turned to face me, his arms coming around my waist. He was smiling as he picked up a hand and ran his thumb across my cheek. I kept me eyes on his as he pulled me closer to his chest.

We were both quiet for a moment, “a penny for your thoughts, Bell.”

“I was just thinking about how I’ve used my second chance wisely. I mean, would you agree? Have I used it wisely like Lincoln told me to?”  
I smiled up at my husband, the need to know he wasn’t wasting his second chance sparkling in his eyes. I took in a deep breath and then shook my head, “no,” he looked surprise as I laughed at his expression, “we haven’t had nearly enough time together yet.”

He laughed, the tension leaving his body, “well the castle is quiet now,” he raised his eyebrows at me, “what did you have in mind?”

I bit my lip as I laced my fingers through his, pulling him back towards our room. I smiled as he kissed me the moment the doors to the balcony closed. His hands ran down my sides as his mouth moved with mine, my heart pounding inside my chest. I could never get enough of him, there would never come a day when I wouldn’t want to kiss him or touch him. He was the only one for me.

“Someday when I see my cousin again, I’ll have to thank her. She helped me find you, my new best friend.”

Bellamy smiled as he trailed his kiss down my neck, tickling my skin with each breath he let out, “I don’t know what I did to deserve you or your love. But I am forever grateful.”

I pulled his face back to mine as we fell onto our bed. I laughed as he pulled down the strap to my dress, his fingers tickling my sides. He knew every move to use, every line to say that would get me to do what he wanted. No matter how many times he used them, I would melt in his arms. I couldn’t stop smiling as he kissed my shoulder.

Three years we had been together and this still wasn’t enough. Before he pulled my dress of my leg I grabbed his hand, waiting for his eyes to find mine. When he stopped and looked at me confused I nodded, “you used your second chance and became a hero,” I whispered as he hovered above me, “you have two children who adore you, a wife that doesn’t know how to keep her hands off of you. Trust me, Bell. Your second chance was not a mistake.”

His smile was beautiful as he pressed his lips to mine once more. He pulled my dress off slowly, his big hands working this way down my thigh. I knew no matter what was thrown at us next we could handle it together. 

After all we were Bellarke, we were stronger than the magic used against us.

 

——-

 

"Aurora Abigail Blake stop moving!" The braid was lopsided as she spun around in her dress and giggled. She would not stop moving no matter how hard I tried to keep her still to do her hair. She was going to be such a mess if she didn’t let me finish. I sighed, bobby pins sticking out of my mouth as I secured the little up do at the nape of her neck. 

She smiled, "my crown.”

I laughed as I placed the tiny tiara on her head and her face lit up. She spun around, hugging me before she ran out of the room looking for her aunts. She loved showing off her new dresses. She loved how Octavia mooned over the fact that she was a princess with a real crown now. 

Octavia took to Aurora almost as fast as her father. She loved that little girl and took her out of my arms whenever she could when she was a baby. As she started getting bigger she would dance her around the castle, she would have tea parties and dress her up in dresses. Octavia was the perfect aunt I never really thought she could be. It was adorable the way Aurora looked up to her.

I was so happy to have so many people in my children’s lives.

I stood up, my robe falling off my shoulder, "hey you aren't dressed yet?”

I jumped at Bellamy's voice, turning to see him already dressed in his nicest clothes. He had a dark button up shirt that fit loosely around his waste. His dark pants flattered every part of his body, his sword hanging on his back would be the final touch. 

I sighed, "I have children to get ready," I stepped forward and kissed him, running my fingers through his hair, "you clean up pretty well, my king.”

He kissed me back, his lips trailing kisses down my neck. He pushed aside my robe his lips hot against my shoulder, "well we could stall just a little bit longer."

I opened my mouth as he nibbled on my neck, just as Jax started crying. I closed my eyes, groaning as I leaned my forehead against his shoulder, "I'm never going to be able to get dressed in time.”

Bellamy stepped back, his hand on my shoulder, "I'll get him, don't worry. Go get dressed," he pressed his lips to my forehead and left the room. 

I ran the brush through my hair when I heard Bellamy enter Jax's room. We kept the baby close, only a door away so we could hear him when he needed something. Bellamy’s deep voice always carried from room to room when they were so close, "hey buddy. What's wrong? Mommy has to make herself pretty, although that shouldn't take long. So you're stuck with me kid.”

I smiled as I imagined him scooping the baby up into his arms. He was in love with his son, he had it down now that Aurora was older. I loved seeing them together. They were precious, they both were.

Jax stopped crying, I knew Bellamy was bouncing him like he always did, "you know we both got it made buddy. We're pretty lucky your moms amazing. She loves you, more than me.”

I smiled, tears in my eyes. I loved my son, I loved my daughter. But the love I had for their father would never be equal to or less than the love I held for them. They were the three most important people in my life. 

I pulled my robe off and stepped into the black dress I had chosen for today. I flatted the fabric against my stomach and then braided my hair. I pulled it up into a bun and decided against makeup. I walked back into our bedroom just as Bellamy brought Jax in.

"I told you she was beautiful," his voice was deep and soothing, Jax always responded to it. Even in my stomach he would settle the moment his daddy spoke. They had a bond I would never understand. A bond only a father and son could share.

I blushed, "now we have get you ready, I tickled under his chin as he giggled. I loved moments like this, where all I needed where my boys. 

Bellamy's eyes found mine, "you always look beautiful, Clarke. But you look nice tonight.”

"I love you the most," I whispered as I kissed his cheek. Jax was giggling in his arms as we pulled apart.

Bellamy changed his son and then I took his hand in mine, "let's go introduce the world to our most precious adventures."

 

\----

 

The trumpets played loudly as the room filled with guests. Everyone was wearing a dress, some were wearing gowns. Aurora was chomping at the bit to get out there and dance with her dad. Octavia and Raven had already made their appearance. The crowd wasn't waiting for them. They were waiting for us.

I bit my lip as Bellamy grabbed my hand, "we should go first and give a little speech about the ball. Then we'll introduce the babies.”

I nodded, "Miller made sure everyone left weapons outside?”

I had had a dream that someone would hurt my family. Ever since then I had been weary. Bellamy had promised to keep it safe. Miller himself had promised to make sure nothing happened. After the curse I took my dreams seriously. I wouldn't risk my family for anything, not if I could help it.

"It'll be fine Clarke, Miller is the best guard there is. We both know he'll take a bullet for us.”

I nodded as Bell pulled me close and kissed my head. I smiled as Aurora squeezed in between us and hugged us both, "I a princess.”

Bellamy laughed, "my little princess," he said as he hoisted her up into his arms.

"Hey that's my nickname," I tickled her sides as she giggled loudly, "taking my man and my nickname. I swear Aurora you're so selfish. It's a good thing you're so cute.”

She kept laughing as I kissed her cheek, nuzzling her nose as she grabbed my cheeks and gave me a sloppy kiss, "mommy."

Bellamy was laughing as he set her back down. There was a chime and everyone stopped taking as he stood up straighter. I squeezed auroras shoulder as Octavia kept Jax, "alright sweetheart. We're going to talk to the people and then we'll call you out, okay?”

She nodded, swirling her dress and smiling as I stood back up. I took in a breath and looked at my husband. He grabbed my hand and then we we walked out onto the steps that lead into the room. 

Everyone clapped as we stood under the lights and I couldn't stop smiling as Bell pressed a kiss to my cheek. I leaned into him, blushing as the crowd calmed down.

"Thank you all for coming," Bellamy's voice echoed against the walls, "we are so happy to have you all in our home. We promised the past is the past, we are all here to support each other. You our not only our people but our friends.”

I smiled, lacing my fingers through his, "which means we are very excited to introduce our two most precious people to you all. Our little princess and little prince.”

Aurora came bounding out as Octavia carried Jax for me. I smiled as the baby settled in my arms, Aurora spinning around for everyone, showing off her dress. I heard gasps and sighs, the woman smiling at our little babies. Bellamy grabbed Aurora and picked her up, kissing her cheek with a smile.

"This is our little princess, the one who saved the kingdom before she was even born," she giggled as he tickled her sides, "wave to the crowd Aurora.”

She waved the way she had been practicing for the last few days. I laughed as she buried her face into her dad’s shoulder. I smiled, "and this handsome little replica of his father is Jax Aries Blake.”

The kingdom had come full circle now. The last baby shown to the people was Bellamy almost twenty years ago. I leaned into my husbands side as we stood there and our people smiled at us. It was such a different life from the one I entered into. But I wouldn't change it for the world. 

"So now that we've introduced you all please dance, eat, have something to drink. Our home is your home for the night.”

We walked down into the room, Jax falling asleep in my arms as one of the hand maidens came to take him back to his room. I thanked her, grateful that he was still young enough to avoid this scene. Aurora grabbed my hand and drug me towards the dance floor.

"Mommy dance!" She giggled as I spun her around. The music was loud and fast, it was easy to dance to. Octavia was with Lincoln. My dad watching us from his table. He had arrived early this morning, tired but so excited to meet his grandchildren. 

Aurora already had him wrapped around her finger. She crawled up on his lap and giggled when he told her a joke. That's all it took for them to become best friends. Jax was asleep, of course my dad loved him like the son he never had. It was bittersweet, knowing my mom wouldn't never get to meet her grandchildren. She had always been so good with kids. 

I smiled at my dad, "hey bud, aunt Octavia is a much better dancer than me why don't you go squeeze in with her and uncle Lincoln.”

He ran towards my sister as I walked towards my dad. I smiled as he stood up and hugged me tightly, "I haven't seen you this happy in a really long time Clarke.”

"I haven't been this happy in a long time. I'm so glad I found him," Bellamy was dancing with our daughter now, "this is a life I never thought I'd want, but I do.”

He nodded, "you got real lucky.”

I put my arm on his forearm, "dance with me.”

I didn't give him a chance to protest, instead I pulled him out onto the floor as the song slowed down. Bell took Aurora, her little feet on his. Octavia was with Lincoln, her ring fingered hand pressed against his chest. I smiled at my dad, leaning in close and feeling the weight of the world fall off my shoulders.

"Your mom would be so proud of you," his voice was soft. We rarely spoke of mom these days, "so would Harper.”

I felt a pain in my chest thinking of Harper. I knew it wasn't wrong to love Bellamy. Sometimes it was hard to remember she would be okay with the way things happened. The curse was the reason for her death, not Bell. The curse was broken, no more girls had to die for a cause they weren't old enough to understand.

At the end of the day that was the most important thing. 

My dad and I danced to half the song when someone tapped my shoulder. Aurora stood there smiling, "daddy told me I should ask if I could cut in.”

I laughed, "of course. Dad someone much more beautiful wants to dance with you now.”

Bellamy grabbed my waist before I could walk off the dance floor. We watched our daughter dance with her grandfather, taking in the sweetest moment we had ever had. I smiled as he turned me around and kissed me in front of the entire room. I smiled as he pulled away, my arms wrapped around his neck.

"I love you Mrs. Blake," his voice was warm in my ear, "always have.”

I giggled, "always will.”

I leaned my head against his chest, our bodies swaying to the music, our minds somewhere else. I knew we wanted to be alone, but this was even sweeter. Being together with our people, showing them the United from we were, they could see how strong we were together. 

I closed my eyes, silencing my fears about Harper. I said a silent prayer, thanking her for bringing this man and these children into my life. Bellamy pressed his lips against the top of my head and everything in the world felt right.

The princess wasn't always a damsel in distress. Sometimes she was strong enough to save the kingdom and fall in love with the prince. By some grace of magic the prince falls in love with her strong willed nature too. 

Separately we saved each other; together we saved the kingdom.


End file.
